Post by Nathan Saniti on Mar 25, 2017 8:26:27 GMT -5
Sunday, March 19th, 2017
Jerry Andrews: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to MASS DESTRUCTION SEVEN! I’m Jerry Andrews…
Ace Anderson: ...And I’m Ace Anderson. Man! Do we ever have a stacked card for the pay-per-view! Every title is on the line, and that just PART of the action happening here in the PCW Arena tonight!
Jerry Andrews: The Faithful are in for a treat, for sure. The World Championship is on the line when the champ “The Fabulous One” Dan Fierce goes one-on-one against Grimm in a STEEL CAGE!
Ace Anderson: Yep, and the only way to win is to escape the cage. No DQ’s. No count outs. No pinfalls or submissions.
Jerry Andrews: Seromine will defend his International Championship against BOTH “Dollface” Kelli Starr and Rick Majors.
Ace Anderson: Another battle for gold is the North American Champion Nathan Saniti defending his belt against High Tide.
Jerry Andrews: Let’s not forget the battle to end all battles, as Eira and “The Asshole” Whitey Ford tear into each other for the umpteenth time. That’s sure to be down and dirty fight.
Ace Anderson: I dunno, Jerry. Whitey’s been turning over a new leaf. Dirty doesn’t seem to be his style nowadays. The Underground Championship will be on the line when Kyle Shane defends against a very determined and capable newcomer; Olivia Xavier.
Jerry Andrews: She may be a newcomer, but she and Kyle didn’t exactly become buddies this last month.
Ace Anderson: Yeah Kyle Shane’s displays at social ineptitude put off the glamorous gladiator and put him square in her crosshairs.
Jerry Andrews: “Ineptitude?” That’s a big word. You sure you should hurt yourself this early into the show? We’ll also see the returning Hiroshi Yukio take on another fan favorite: Andy D!
Ace Anderson: I hate you and I hope you get kidnapped and thrown into a pen filled with horny warthogs.
Jerry Andrews: See? You went and spent all of your wit with one word. What did I tell you about pacing yourself?
Ace Anderson: …
Jerry Andrews: Let’s get this party started with our first match of the night. The brawling Irishman Warwyk…
Ace Anderson: Are there any other kinds of Irishmen?
Jerry Andrews: Welcome. Glad you’re back. Warwyk goes toe-to-toe against a PCW legend, Tyrone “Crazy Boy” Smith.
Sasha Green: Welcome to Mass Destruction Seven!
The crowd pops loudly, ready to kick things off in spectacular fashion
Sasha Green: Our first contest of the evening is for one fall. Introducing first, hailing from Belfast, Ireland and weighing in at 210 pounds… Warwyk!
Silence. The tin whistle begins to play a very captivating melody. Lights fade away.
Just as soon as the lights go completely out a wicked drum best begins to play, the lights pulse with the music. "Devil's Dance Floor" by Flogging Molly blasts over the pa system as a very high intensity young man comes sprinting from behind the curtains with the Ireland flag waving furiously above him!
Warwyk wastes no time talking shit to people in the crowd pointing at his flag yelling, "YOU AINT SHITE!"
He shakes their insults off and turns his attention back to the ring which he sprints too. Leaving the flag he leaps onto the ring apron and just as quick over the top ropes boxing the air. Warwyk climbs a turnbuckle holding his arms above his head yelling insults at the PCW faithful.
Jerry Andrews: Warwyk doesn’t seem like he’s in a very good mood tonight.
Ace Anderson: Is he ever?
Jerry Andrews: Good point.
Sasha Green: And his opponent, all the way from Biloxi, Mississippi… Weighing in at 227 pounds… Tyrone “Crazy Boy” Smith!
The lights flicker and fade out as the pulsating beats of Dope Star Inc's "10000 Watts of Artificial Pleasure" pops on the PA system. Smoke fills the arena as a figure stands in the middle of it. All the sudden, Crazy Boy comes out of the smoke and pumps a fist in the air. He walks down the entryway and climbs the ropes of the ring. He bounces around the ropes a few times, pumps his fist in the air one last time and waits for his opponent to come.
Match One
Singles Match
Warwyk vs. Tyrone “Crazy Boy” Smith
Referee: The Masked Official
Singles Match
Warwyk vs. Tyrone “Crazy Boy” Smith
Referee: The Masked Official
The two men wait for the Masked Official to call for the bell. Finally, they begin to circle each other, closing in for a lock-up when suddenly…
“Gold on the Ceiling,” by the Black Keys blares over the loudspeakers Within a few seconds, none other than PCW’s President, “Mr. Showtime” Michael Wryght pops out from the back, halting the action in the ring, much to the bewilderment of the competitors. Once the crowd dies down, Wryght begins to speak.
Showtime: Before we get too far into this, I’m afraid I have a couple bits of bad news for the Faithful.
The crowd begins to jeer the President, but he holds up a hand to get them to quiet once more.
Showtime: The first bit of bad news is that effective at the end of this program, I will be stepping down as the PCW President.
The peanut gallery reacts with a fairly even mixture of emotions to the revelation.
Ace Anderson: NO! You can’t leave us! You were going to make PCW great again!
Jerry Andrews: Let’s hear him out before the tears flow, snowflake.
Showtime: I know it may come as a shock, but my schedule simply can’t allow me to continue as an effective leader, so it’s only right that I step down and let someone else take over. And that person is…
Showtime gestures towards the stage entrance, but no one comes out.
Showtime: That person is going to be revealed at Trauma 209. So tune in and find out then!
Another mixture of reactions from the Faithful.
Showtime: The other bit of bad news is why I interrupted this match. You see… Neither of you have been cleared to wrestle. So I’m afraid that my last act as President of PCW will be to pull this match. But of course, I have to do it in style. My way.
With that, four of Seromine’s followers emerge from the curtain, beelining it to the ring and surrounding the competitors. Showtime leaves as both Crazy Boy and Warwyk go back-to-back, the cultists stalking onto the apron in unison. Salvation closes in, trading blows with the men who were booked.
Jerry Andrews: Come on! There’s no call for this!
Ace Anderson: CB and Warwyk are taking a beating in the worst way.
Lazarus exits the ring, grabbing a pair of chairs and tossing them to Eli and Josiah. He grabs another pair, giving one to Abraham and keeping the last one for himself. The four men use the chairs to usher in a confessional full of pain when suddenly…
A masked wrestler clad in baby blue and gold rushes the ring with a chair of his own. He lands a few good shots in on the biggest of the cultists, sending the rest of them scurrying like rats deserting a sinking ship. The four make their way back up the ramp, satisfied that they have done well in their savior’s eyes.
Ace Anderson: Is… Is that a superhero?
Jerry Andrews: I dunno if he’s super, but he’s definitely a hero. He’s saved Warwyk and Crazy Boy.
Ace Anderson: It looks to me like the damage has already been done.
Paramedics and officials alike flood the ring to tend to the two wrestlers while the masked man keeps unflinching guard. They manage to assist a barely conscious Warwyk and a hobbling Crazy Boy back to the back to seek complete medical attention, still under the hero’s watchful gaze.
Jerry Andrews: Well, it looks like our second match is going to be what kicks off the action…
Ace Anderson: What the hell was that? That wasn’t action? And who the hell was that masked guy?
Jerry Andrews: I… I don’t know. I’m just as puzzled as you.
Ace Anderson: Well, I hope this doesn’t set a precedent for the night.
Jerry Andrews: Me too. Let’s talk about our next match. Two fan favorites, Hiroshi Yukio takes on Andy D. Ace, do you think Andy D has a chance at this?
Ace Anderson: That’s about like throwing an egg at a wall and expecting the wall to fall.
Match Two
Singles Match
Hiroshi Yukio vs. Andy D
Referee: Manny Cruz
Singles Match
Hiroshi Yukio vs. Andy D
Referee: Manny Cruz
Sasha Green: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from Tokyo, Japan, weighing in at 500 pounds, Hiroshi Yukio!
The crowd looks to the entrance way as Rising Sun roars out and they know who is coming out from backstage and they start cheering loudly almost drowning out the music.
Hiroshi Yukuo steps through the curtain his face lit up with a smile
He walks slowly down the ramp as the cheering intensifies as the PCW faithful don't hold back for the mountain man from Japan.
He waves to the crowd as he walks and when he sees a kid at ringside and holds up his sign and takes a selfie with him.
As he continues to walk down to the ring as the crowd grows louder and louder so even the announcers can't get a word in over the cheering.
He goes up the ring steps and steps over the top rope and into the ring After he does he does a purification ritual by throwing salt in the ring to cleanse it before the match.
The music fades out as Hiroshi stays in the ring waiting for his opponent.
Sasha Green: And his opponent, hailing from somewhere in the U.K. and weighing in at 197 pounds… Andy D!
The arena lights go down as the start of Damn Nation by Lower Than Atlantis starts up. As the first verse kicks in, a couple of spotlights start to scan over random sections of the crowd as the letters AD are emblazoned on the big screen, with various video highlights of Andy's career visible only within the letters themselves.
You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink.
You can lead your lambs to slaughter if it’s what the shepherd thinks
As the chorus starts up on the song, an explosion of Pyro's go off and the arena lights all come back up to reveal Andy standing in the center of the ring. He stands there for a moment, soaking up the reactions of the crowd before he removes his bucket hat and places it on the steel pole part of the turnbuckle, ready for the match.
The bell rings and both men circle each other. Yukio lunges forward but Andy ducks other and delivers a pair of quick kicks to Hiroshi’s legs. Hiroshi turns and swings a massive arm at Andy D’s head but the smaller man ducks under and continues to pelt Hiroshi with kicks to the leg.
Jerry Andrews: I’d say the size and strength advantage in this match clearly favors Hiroshi Yukio.
Ace Anderson: Really, you think so? Well then I’d say that water is clearly wet and fire is clearly hot. Any other brilliant bits of analysis you’d like to share with the folks at home?
Andy continued to duck and dodge but soon finds himself trapped in a corner. He tries to dodge past yet another blow from Hiroshi, but the big man is quicker than he looks. He catches Andy D by the collar of his T-shirt and yanks him back into a bear hug. Andy tries to fight out of the bone crushing hold but Hiroshi responds by throwing Andy with an overhead belly-to-belly suplex. Andy lands hard and Hiroshi is right there for the pin.
1…
Andy kicks out at one.
Jerry Andrews: Hiroshi goes for the quick pin, trying to put this one away early.
Ace Anderson: I don’t think so, Jerry. Hiroshi knew that wouldn’t keep Andy down but he could make him expend some energy early one by forcing him to kick out.
Hiroshi gets to his feet, pulling Andy up with him. Andy counters with a pair of quick shots that force Hiroshi to release his hold.
Jerry Andrews: Andy creating a little separation.
Ace Anderson: He’s got to if he wants to stay in this thing. A stern look from Hiroshi would be strong enough to knock Andy down.
Jerry Andrews: The bigger stronger man doesn’t always win, Ace.
Ace Anderson: No, but it helps.
Working with the newfound space between them, Andy sets back to work circling Hiroshi and chopping at his powerful legs with blistering kicks. Again and again kicks to the thigh echo throughout the arena until finally Andy is a shade to slow and Hiroshi catches his leg. Thinking quickly Andy leaps and lands a hard hitting enziguri upside Hiroshi’s head.
Hiroshi staggers back to the corner, shaking his head and trying to clear his vision. Andy presses the advantage and sprints towards the Japanese giant. Hiroshi has other ideas and explodes out of the corner with a vicious clothes line that somehow fails to connect as Andy D rolls under it. With his opponent momentarily distracted, Andy follows through on the roll, getting right back to his feet.
Without losing any momentum, Andy leaps to the middle turnbuckle and bounces backwards with a middle rope moonsault. Right into the waiting arms of Hiroshi Yukio as he catches the bouncing Brit and plants him back into the mat with swinging side slam. Hiroshi goes for the pin once again.
1…
2…
Andy kicks out right before the ref counts three. Hiroshi looks to Manny Cruz to confirm the count and shakes his head in disbelief. With Hiroshi’s back turned, Andy takes the opportunity to roll out of the ring to try to regroup.
Ace Anderson: If Andy knew what was good for him he’d stay down. You don’t much in the way of career longevity by being a human crash test dummy.
Jerry Andrews: When have you ever known Andy to just stay down?
Hiroshi spots Andy outside the ring but doesn’t give chase, instead he moves to the opposite side of the ring, beckoning Andy back in. Andy looks dubious but shrugs as he slides back into the ring. The two begin to circle again.
Ace Anderson: What the hell is Hiroshi thinking just letting him back into the ring like that? He should have pressed the advantage.
Jerry Andrews: There’s no honor in hitting a man while he’s down and Hiroshi Yukio has always taken his role as an honorable warrior very seriously.
Ace Anderson: Well that’s just dumb; you’re not going to win many matches in PCW with that kind of attitude.
Hiroshi throws another clothesline at Andy but Mister D is able to duck under it yet again, building up momentum he runs the hell away from Yukio towards the far ropes. Rebounding, he leaps at Hiroshi, trying to take the big man down with a running tornado ddt. Hiroshi is ready for him though and pushes him away.
Completely unfazed, Andy rolls backwards and lands against the ropes. Pushing off he charges as Hiroshi Yukio, still going for the Tornado DDT. The second time doesn’t turn out to be the charm either instead of merely pushing him away like before, Hiroshi catches Andy flush with a fierce Osaka Overdrive.
Andy hits the mat hard as Hiroshi charges forward with a full head of steam.
Ace Anderson: The big man is looking to drop bombs like its Pearl Harbor.
Jerry Andrews: I don’t even know what to say to that, Ace, that’s just wildly offensive.
Ace Anderson: Suck it up, snowflake.
Moving faster than a big man should, Hiroshi takes to the air, looking to snuff the life out of Andy D with Bombs Away. At the last possible second Andy rolls out of the way and Hiroshi hits the mat hard enough to rattle the ring. He isn’t down for long but its long enough for Andy to press the advantage, laying into the larger man with a bountiful barrage of bestial blows. As Andy continues to rain down punishment all Yukio can do is block as he staggers backwards towards the ropes. Andy takes to the air and plants a dropkick in the big man’s chest, causing him to fall against the ropes. Looking at the precarious positioning of Hiroshi, Andy grins and starts to run towards the ropes.
Ace Anderson: All of that and Hiroshi is still standing.
Jerry Andrews: Barely. This is the closest that Andy has come to taking Hiroshi Yukio off his feet.
Ace Anderson: Horse shoes and hand grenades, Andrews, those are the only two places that close is acceptable. If Andy D can’t even take Hiroshi off his feet, he doesn’t have the slightest chance of winning this.
As the two announces continue to bicker Andy launches himself from the middle rope and hits Yukio flush with a springboard missile dropkick. The blow is enough to send the sumo tumbling between the middle ropes to the outside.
Jerry Andrews: You were saying, Ace?
Ace Anderson: Well sure, if he wants to win by count out, I guess.
Jerry Andrews: Are you pouting because Andy proved you wrong?
Ace Anderson: Your face is wrong, Andrews!
Hiroshi Yukio isn’t down for long though. Andy looks down in weary disbelief as Yukio pulls himself back up with the aid of the of the ring apron. The two men stare each other down as a smile tugs at the corner of Hiroshi’s mouth as if to say, “Is that it?”
Responding to the unspoken taunt, Andy turns for the far ropes and rebounds off, charging for all he’s worth. Defying expectations as only Andy D does, he doesn’t fly over the ropes. Instead he drops into a baseball slide, again planting both feet into the chest of Yukio. The larger man grunts and staggers back but does not fall. Undeterred, Andy rebounds off the ropes again and this time flies through the rope with a suicide dive. Again Yukio absorbs the blow with his massive upper body and staggers back, this time hitting the barrier. Andy doesn’t miss a step and hops up to the apron.
Taking aim at his target, Andy leaps off the apron and lands on Hiroshi Yukio with a hurricanrana. But Hiroshi catches the smaller superstar and as Andy desperately tries to fight his way out of the sumo’s larger than life grip, Yukio turns and power bombs Andy back first into the barrier.
Jerry Andrews: Good god, we might need Manny Cruz to stop the match.
Ace Anderson: It’s his own fault, Jerry. He tried to get fancy one too many times and it came back to bite him in a big way.
The count moves to four as Hiroshi slides into the ring, leaving Andy to writhe on the floor. Manny Cruz continues his count.
5…
6…
Ace Anderson: I don’t think Andy’s going to beat the count.
7…
8…
Jerry Andrews: No, not like this.
9…
Hiroshi drops to the mat and rolls out of the ring, restarting the referee’s count.
Jerry Andrews/Ace Anderson: What?!
Ace Anderson: Of all the-honestly who just throws away a victory like that? I guarantee this is going to come back to haunt Hiroshi, he should have just taken the damn win and been happy with it.
Jerry Andrews: Hiroshi didn’t want to win via count out, there’s no honor in that.
Andy D finally begins to stir at ringside as Hiroshi rolls back into the ring. Manny Cruz just looks confused and starts to count again when Hiroshi gently lays a hand on his shoulder and simply shakes his head no.
Andy has to use the ropes and the apron to pull himself back into the ring but he’s finally able to do so. Hiroshi moves over to him and to the surprise of everyone, especially Andy, helps him to his feet and dusts him off.
Ace Anderson: What the actual hell is going on here? First Hiroshi screws himself out of an easy victory by breaking the ref’s count but now he’s actually helping his opponent back up and dusting him off? Am I having a seizure, is that toast I smell?
Jerry Andrews: I told you Ace, Hiroshi is-
Ace Anderson: If you say another word about honor I will find something heavy and not secured to the floor and beat you with it.
Hiroshi turns Andy around to dust off his back but Andy has other ideas and flips around, catching Hiroshi with a Pele Kick. The move catches Hiroshi by surprise and takes him off his feet as Andy lays back over him and hooks the leg for a cover.
The referee doesn’t even get a one count before Hiroshi presses out with authority, sending Andy halfway across the ring. Both men are slow to react but surprisingly it’s Andy D to his feet first with Hiroshi still struggling to get to a kneeling position. With Hiroshi in the perfect position, Andy flies in and connects with the Dragon’s Bite.
Jerry Andrews: Dragon’s Bite, this one is over.
Ace Anderson: I knew this would all come back to bite him.
Andy covers the supine sumo and count along with the referee.
1...
2...
And Hiroshi kicks out! Andy can’t believe it! The fans can’t believe it! Andy bounces back to his feet and starts to lay into Hiroshi Yukio again, peppering his chest and back with blows. The ref finally gets between the two men and forces a separation as Yukio slowly gets towards his feet. But no sooner is he up than Andy leaps and wraps an arm around his neck, using his momentum to spike Hiroshi’s head into the mat with a tornado ddt.
Andy is fired up as kips up and moves between the ropes and starts motioning for Hiroshi to rise. The large man is slow to get but Andy is patient. He takes flight just as Hiroshi finally gets back to his base and connects with his springboard blockbuster.
Jerry Andrews: Schmerzilch!
Andy leans against the turnbuckle again, motioning frantically for Hiroshi to get up. Exhausted and still out of it from the schmerzilch, Hiroshi is even slower to get to his feet. But Andy doesn’t need him to be all the way up. With a running leap Andy connects with a second Dragon’s Bite and Hiroshi rocks back but doesn’t quite fall. Andy backs up into the corner and calls for a third one.
With a great running leap Andy goes flying at Hiroshi, who, whether through luck or instinct catches him and drives him into the mat with an absolutely brutal Hiroshima Hammer.
Ace Anderson: I don’t believe it, he caught him!
Both men are laying on the mat exhausted and it’s all Hiroshi can do to drape an arm over Andy’s chest.
1…
2…
3..
Jerry Andrews: After coming so close, Andy D just couldn’t overcome the size advantage held by Hiroshi Yukio.
Ace Anderson: I told you, Jerry, size and strength due the trick more often than not.
Jerry Andrews: It certainly did in this case, but I still don’t think that Andy D has anything to be ashamed off. Both men fought valiantly but this time Hiroshi Yukio came out ahead.
Sasha Green: Your winner via pinfall: Hiroshi Yukio!
The parking garage to the arena was quiet, all except the screeching of tires from the floor above and the dull roar of the crowd anticipating one of PCW's biggest PPV's. Robert King Jr. walked in silence towards the staff entrance, feeling a bit nervous and unsure of his place in such a large establishment. Having grown up in Maine, he had deftly avoided large crowds and events other than rock shows, and then he was half sick from drinking whiskey and his voice was hoarse from yelling the lyrics to the band to the car radio on the way to the venue. Today, his voice was strong but still unused, and his stomach fluttered with a different kind of sickness. Truth be told, he was nervous. Adjusting the strap of the duffel bag flung over his shoulder, Bob plodded forward towards the door in his steel toe boots. I bet nobody ever showed up here in a denim vest with Slayer patches on them...He thought to himself. I bet they all wear suit and ties, and eat caviar, and don't swear, and don't drink whiskey...
All of a sudden, Bob King felt very alone.
"I wish Whitey was here..." He found himself thinking as he opened the double door to step inside the backstage area of the arena. His only friend in South Carolina had assured him he'd meet him in the parking garage, but after half an hour of waiting, he couldn't stand it anymore, and assumed his old friend had gotten drunk and forgot, who was just fashionably late. But he refused to be late himself, and knew that he had to be at his locker room on time. Especially on my first day, dude. Running his fingers through his impressive mustache, Bob continued down the hallway with only the sound of his boots against the tile to accompany him. As he turned a corner, that changed however, as two men in black security T-shirts stood sentry in front of the only door in the hallway.
"Excuse me, sir, I'll need to see your backstage pass." One of them, a balding man who was far too fat to secure just about anything asked him in an authoritative voice.
Bob paused for a moment, holding up his hand as a disarming gesture and dropping his duffel bag to the ground. "Ok, dude, I'm sorry. I didn't know I had to show anybody anything...I'm here with Whitey." He knelt down slowly, respectful of the security guards positions and job, and unzipped the bag.
"I'm here with Whitey, sorry dude!" The second guard said in a voice that mocked Bob's own deep one. He was used to people poking fun at his slow and deep drawl, sounding more like he was down south than of the north east. "I bet he's his coke dealer. Frisk him."
"No, dude!" Bob exclaimed with a shocked look on his face as his hands worked their way through the pile of clothes in the bag. "He asked me to work for him, and for Pure Class Wrestling out of South Carolina. This is the right place, right?" He only got an odd look from his two accusers, so he continued to ruffle through the bag.
"We just need your credentials, sir." Bald man said in an irritated voice, obviously not happy with his career choice so late in his years. A few moments passed and Bob drew out a neat stack of papers, handing them to the younger of the two, expecting that his youth made him think he was more important than his older counterpart. The security guard inspected the papers, and handed them back to King. "Are they good?" The balding man asked.
"Yeah, I guess. But look at this guy; big mustache, denim vest, he talks slow...he's hiding something. Let's search his bag." The young guard said decisively.
"Just because I was growing facial hair since before you were semen in your dad's ballsack doesn't mean I have something to hide, dude." King shot back, but kept his voice calm to quell any sense of confrontation. "I'm sorry, but you can't search my bag."
The guard snorted and reached down to help himself to the duffel bag, and in a flash Bob had him pushed back against the door with an iron grip on his shoulder, and his free hand shoving a thumb deep into his jugular, as deep as he dared to in fear of breaking skin. The older guard put his arm around Bob's neck and tried to pull him back, but the lean muscle of a man who worked all his life didn't budge. "I'm only here to fight one person, dude. Don't touch my things. You have no right, my pass is valid and I can enter if I want to. I know my rights." Bob's voice was still calm and slow, but with his thumb jabbing into the young guard’s throat, the latter couldn't help but see a threat. He pulled weakly against his forearms to no avail.
"HEY!" The door burst open, knocking the older guard out of the way. Whitey Ford stepped out and put one hand on Bob's arm. "Let him go, Bob. Jesus."
"They won't let me through, dude."
"The fuck are you guys thinking?" Whitey asked incredulously as Bob let go of his prey. The guard gasped for air and coughed violently, stepping further away from the duo. Everyone who worked for PCW knew not to fuck with Whitey Ford. "He's with me. C'mon, Bob, I'll show you to your room."
Bob King retrieved the papers he had dropped on the floor, threw them in his duffel bag, threw it over his shoulder, and headed inside through the open door. "Some southern hospitality."
"Trust me, it doesn't get any better the further south you go. They're all kind of a bunch of cunts." Whitey followed Bob, letting the door shut behind him, and leaving the two security guards feeling a bit less than they were before.
Match Three
For the Underground Title
Singles Match
Olivia Xavier vs. Kyle Shane (c)
Referee: Tyrone Little, Jr.
For the Underground Title
Singles Match
Olivia Xavier vs. Kyle Shane (c)
Referee: Tyrone Little, Jr.
Sasha Green: The following match is contested under Underground Rules for one fall and is for the Underground Championship! Introducing the challenger, hailing from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania and weighing in at 157 pounds… Olivia Xavier!
As the overhead lights slowly begin to dim, the blended synth and violin opening of 'Quicksilver' by The Cruxshadows hits the sound system. Amidst the pulsating beat, the deep and resonant voice of Rogue himself makes itself known, intoning over the music as the arena goes dark. The full-blown blackout is timed with when he finishes and the song itself briefly goes silent.
I should be ashamed for what you've done to me.
It's only happened because I let it be...but no more.
It's only happened because I let it be...but no more.
As the instrumental bridge picks back up after that pause, green and white sparks tumbling down from the ceiling to form a veritable curtain of illumination-- and before it stands Olivia Xavier herself, visible only as a silhouette due to the falling pyrotechnics behind her. Even without a clear sight of her, the crowd can be heard cheering for her, albeit not as loudly as they would more established fan favorites. Her shoulders square and her hands at her sides, she remains as still as can be until the sparks taper off to nothing and the chorus picks up with a vengeance.
I'm taking back my love, taking back my pride,
taking back my dreams... and my life.
This is the ground I will defend.
A rage of angels bears the end.
taking back my dreams... and my life.
This is the ground I will defend.
A rage of angels bears the end.
White and green lights flash along both sides of the ramp as the overhead lights come back up to partial illumination to augment the two colors. Spurred into motion by the sound of the vocals kicking in, Olivia's fists thrust themselves into the air for a moment before she's making her way down the ramp. The fans aren't completely ignored, a hand slapped here or there-- but when she reaches the bottom of the ramp, she pauses, her head turning in either direction to take in the crowd.
Ace Anderson: The crowd is HYPED, Jerry!
Jerry Andrews: Gold on the line in this match, Ace; you KNOW this is going to be a fight from bell to bell.
I'm taking back my hope, taking back my goals,
taking back my memories... and my soul.
This brand is forged to my crusade.
Quicksilver, the future belongs to the brave.
taking back my memories... and my soul.
This brand is forged to my crusade.
Quicksilver, the future belongs to the brave.
Once she's seen as much as she wants to see, Olivia suddenly surges forward with a burst of speed in order to smoothly slide into the ring on her stomach. Quickly climbing to her feet, a few strides carry her over to her corner of the ring. She climbs onto the second set of ropes, she once again surveys the crowd before she's hopping down and going through a few basic stretches, her music fading as she waits for the match to begin.
Sasha Green: And introducing the reigning Underground King, weighing in at 218 pounds, from Boston, Massachusetts, “The God of Game” Kyle Shane!
The opening notes of "In The Morning And Amazing" by Circa Survive begins to play. The big screen shows shots of Kyle’s matches. Kyle Shane steps slowly out onto the stage. The Assassin’s hood to his long coat is pulled low over his face. The distinctive voice of Anthony Green hits the bridge:
"And how could anyone
You are in my dreams
Half human, half machine
You with someone else that I have felt and seen
I cannot rest, or my consciousness contest
Looking right through the lens
From winter brings the spring again"
Jerry Andrews: All right, so we’re at the dance Ace. What’re we looking at between these two competitors?
Ace Anderson: Well the champ has a height and weight advantage, which means Olivia is going to have to go to HIM and that’s If he chooses to play it that way. Let’s remember that Shane isn’t exactly a lumbering brute so he can move and get around as he wants to. The speed advantage isn’t so drastic that he needs to worry about running the tank dry.
Jerry Andrews: It sounds like Shane has the advantage in most tangible aspects of this matchup.
Ace Anderson: He does, but it’s the INTANGIBLES that can make all the difference. Olivia is HUNGRY. You can see it in her eyes, in how she carries herself. That drive, that desire will make a person to go to ANY lengths to hit the mark. I’d say that evens the playing field and it’s hard to determine how this one is going to end when the smoke clears.
Jerry Andrews: Excellent analysis, Ace. Let’s --
At ringside, however, Shane hasn’t even made it to the ring before Xavier is all over him and this match is underway!
DING DING!
The two are throwing lefts and rights at each other, a flurry of heavy hands which Olivia manages to get the upper hand on Shane ...doubling him over with a boot to the gut before vaulting him over the barricade into the eager crowd! Shane is quick to try and distance himself from the fight but Xavier is right there on him, sending him headfirst into a guardrail.
The clang of his skull smacking the metal somewhat dulled by the raucous crowd, it’s no less effective. Xavier grabbing Shane, she whips him down a side passage into a closed door that leads towards the outer layers of the backstage area.
The cameras scramble to get to the action and not miss a single shot, and to their credit ... they do a damn good job. As they arrive on the scene, Xavier is battling with Shane but Shane is throwing his own shots into the mix. It’s a back and forth slugfest as Shane manages to get enough of an upper hand to pick Xavier up and ram her back-first into the wall.
Ace Anderson: Luckily, we have an experience and well-practiced chiropractor on staff here. Shout out to Dr. Slajcomb!
Jerry Andrews: A fine doctor, for sure.
A second slam into the wall and Xavier is dropped roughly to the cement floor. As Shane works to shake the cobwebs out, he continues to throw prodding boots at the recovering challenger. Going for a nearby television monitor, he hoists it high above his head but Xavier is quick on the response and throws a well-placed boot to the grundle region ... prompting a falsetto yelp.
As Shane hits his knees on the floor, Xavier punches the almighty fuck out of him ... helping him the rest of the way down.
Ace Anderson: Jee-hee-zus ... right in the wee jolly danglies!
Jerry Andrews: We again caution you , fans - don’t try this at home.
Xavier standing and kicking the dropped television monitor away, she begins to pull/drag the champ by the head along the hallway, randomly stopping here and there to bash his skull into the baseboards. With a fluid motion, Shane is up and over with a hip-toss onto ... THROUGH ... a nearby table. Plastic red SOLO cups jettisoned in every possible direction, Xavier pants and leans back against the wall ... the dull throbbing in her back enough to give her pause.
As Shane relentlessly attempts to make it back to his feet, Xavier scouts around for an implement of suffering. The dreaded foreign object. A philosophical question: what is one to do when foreign objects are no longer foreign, but commonplace? Something to give you pause. As Olivia returns with a broom, Shane springs into action ... nailing her in the face with an electrical cord wrapped around his knuckles. Not a knockout blow, but painful nonetheless. Letting it uncoil from his fingers ... WHAP!
The sound of thick cord striking bare flesh like a whip is enough to give any sane person a sharp jolt, and in crystal clear high definition (YES! PCW is being streamed live in HD!) ... the effects are multiplied. Xavier screaming out in pain, she scrambles to escape the attack even further down the hallway. Upon reaching the end of the hallway, the door is thrown open as she makes it back to her feet with Kyle Shane in hot pursuit.
Ace Anderson: Where are they GOING? Neither of them can win the match out there; they have to be in the ring!
Jerry Andrews: Excellent point, Ace. And if this keeps up, I’m not so sure EITHER of them will be able to make it back to the ring to claim the victory.
As Shane rushes through the door, Xavier is there with a steel trash can! BONNNNNG! The metallic echo sounding off, Kyle Shane goes cross-eyed and drops to a knee before Xavier rushes him, whipping him forward into a parked equipment truck. Grasping at the latch, she lifts the door and begins to climb with Shane into the 18 wheeler.
Jerry Andrews: They’re going into the back of the truck, Ace. There’s probably lots of goodies for a match like this. Wrenches, tools, cable, chairs ... who knows?
Ace Anderson: ... wait. No, Jerry LOOK!
As Ace has so pointed out, in the back of the truck IS equipment ... but ring equipment. Some turnbuckles strewn about, a spare canvas ... ropes hung from the sides and on the floor. Xavier has found the makings of a spare ring in the truck. LOOPHOLE?! Xavier smiles and rushes a staggering Kyle Shane but as Shane pivots on his heel to avoid the impact, he snatches her into a headlock and ...
PIECES OF EDEN!
A headlock driver straight into the floor of the truck! A sickening thud echoing between the four cramped walls, Shane realizes where he’s at and tells ... nay, DEMANDS ... the referee make the official three count . They’re in a ring, not specified WHICH ring they’re in. Tyrone Little has no choice but to agree and drops to make the count.
ONE!
TWO!
...
...
THREE!
DING DING DING!
The bell in the arena sounds out and the crowd roars! Kyle Shane has retained!
Sasha Green: The winner and STILL Underground Champion: Kyle Shane!
Ace Anderson: I thought Olivia had concocted a BEAUTIFUL set-up, and it nearly paid off ... but Shane manages to avoid the trap and the Underground Title slips through Xavier’s fingers! Well done Olivia; damn, that should’ve worked.
Jerry Andrews: An unbelievable plan but Shane just barely makes it out with his title reign intact. You can bet she’s none too happy and I’m sure this won’t be the last time these two square off. Congratulations to the champion, but for now ...
Ace Anderson: For now, we need to keep things moving. Up next is the second title defense for the evening. The reigning champ Nathan Saniti defends against PCW’s resident pirate, High Tide.
Jerry Andrews: Some people might not remember this, but when the tag team division was going strong, Saniti and Tide had butted heads many times, alongside their respective partners.
Ace Anderson: True dat. Wasp had always been by Tide’s side. Nathan started in the tag division with Q and ended with Kelli Starr, retiring the belts undefeated.
Jerry Andrews: We’ll see if Tide can get a little comeuppance and finally get a win over Saniti and take his gold.
Ace Anderson: SO, he’d be turning the Tide.
Jerry Andrews: Don’t. Just… Don’t.
Sasha Green: The following match is for one fall, and is for the North American Championship! Introducing first the challenger. Hailing from Calgary, ALberta, Canada… Weighing in at 195 pounds… High Tide!
"You Are a Pirate," by Alestorm blares our of the sound system. With very little lighting and effects that simulate lightning, High Tide (in a pirate outfit) walks down the ramp slightly crouched over, as if he was sitting. He holds a large pirate flag in one hand, and in the other he is imitating steering a ship. He does this until he gets to the ring where he motions dropping and anchor and proceeds to hop onto the turnbuckle and dive headfirst over the ropes, rolling into a standing position. Then he climbs the nearest turnbuckle and pulls out a spyglass, looking around at the audience. He mimics loading a cannon and as he motions firing it, he jumps off the turnbuckle into the ring (to imitate recoil) as fireworks shoot from all four turnbuckles.
Sasha Green: And hailing from Balance, weighing in at 200 pounds, he is the North American Champion… Nathan Saniti!
The introductory chimes of "Monster," by Imagine Dragons beckon the entrance of PCW resident Madcap Magician as lime green fog coats the runway from the ring to the entrance. Flanked by Rasputin, Naomi, and Neville, the otherwise normal (for him) looking Nathan Saniti leads the group out from the back, Nathan taking point. He and Neville wave their arms with a flourish, calling to the fog to rise and engulf the lot.
The lights slowly fade as it thickens as it envelops the Harvesters, suddenly dissipating just as rapidly as it appeared, revealing that the group has vanished! A thunderous bolt of lightning strikes the center of the ring with a blinding flash. And another. After a third bolt hits, the lights go out completely for a second. A column of spotlighted smoke begins to build at the center of the ring, snaking its’ way skyward. Lime green and purple spotlights dance around the smoke as the lights fade on and the smog evaporates, revealing the Harvesters in the center of the ring!
Match Four
For the North American Title
Singles Match
High Tide vs. Nathan Saniti ©
Referee: Nigel Gale
For the North American Title
Singles Match
High Tide vs. Nathan Saniti ©
Referee: Nigel Gale
The bell rings, and this match is underway! Nathan and Tide circle each other in the center of the ring, each trying to feel out where the first opening is going to come from. Tide initiates a collar and elbow tie-up, and both men vie for position before the pirate ducks low and pulls Saniti in for a knee to the ribs. He connects a second time before whipping his opponent to the corner. High Tide attempts to surprise Saniti by following close behind him, but before he can hit the avalanche in the corner the crafty Nathan Saniti leaps to the second turnbuckle and backflips over him! Landing deftly on his feet, Saniti lets Tide turn around to meet him with a double ear slap that disorients him, and follows up with an irish whip of his own to the opposite corner. Trying to play mind games, it's Saniti's turn to follow closely after Tide...who ducks his head low and hits the turnbuckle with his shoulders, rolling up and over and landing squarely on the ring apron. Saniti is ready, though, and instead of attempting a would-be splash, he vaults to the second rope and hits a springboard dropkick that sends Tide tumbling to the floor!
Jerry Andrews: Uh oh! Tide crashed ashore!
Ace Anderson: And you tell me to “don’t.”
Tide is quick to his feet, but Nathan has already hit the ropes and looks for a suicide dive to the outside. Tide scouts the move and jumps out of the way, arms flailing comically, but Nathan sees his attack thwarted at the last second and handstands into the ropes, bouncing back to the center of the ring. Saniti taunts Tide with a mocking grin, and motions for him to get back into the ring. Tide obliges, but as Nathan charges the pirate simply slides out on the other side of the ring post. Saniti is looking to take chase this time, and follows his opponent. Tide slides back in, and in his zeal so does Saniti, only to be met by a flurry of boots. Saniti weathers the storm and fights his way to one knee, only to be taken down with a surprise hurricanrana that drives his skull into the mat! Tide bounces to his feet, and drops a leg over Saniti's throat...not one, two, but three times! Tide with a quick cover.
1...
Saniti isn't nearly ready to throw in the towel yet and kicks out with haste. Tide refuses to let Saniti recover, and pulls him to his feet, whipping him towards the ropes...but reverses the momentum at the last second, pulling Nathan back in for a short armed clothesline that drops him to the mat. Taking his time now, sensing that Nathan is dazed, Tide pulls him to his feet once more and bullies him into the corner, laying into him with a knife edged chop, prompting the crowd.
WOOOOO!
He follows up with a punch, then another chop, then a punch, and rinse and repeat! The flurry drops Nathan to the floor again, resting his back against the bottom turnbuckle! Taking a risk by leaving the crafty Nathan Saniti alone for a moment, Tide retreats to the middle of the ring, only to charge in and squash Saniti with a running dropkick! Saniti senses he's in trouble, and crawls along the ropes, trying to use them to regain his footing. High Tide is on a roll though, and as Nathan reaches the second rope, Tide charges again, swinging his feet through the ropes in a 619 kick that lands squarely to Saniti's face!
Jerry Andrews: Tide’s going for a cover again!
Ace Anderson: NO! Only a two count!
Nathan kicks out again, a bit slower this time. Tide argues with the referee, a costly mistake for many competitors. The ref assures him it was a clean two count, and Tide turns back to his quarry, pulling him up by his thick red hair. Saniti surges upwards, breaking the hold on his hair and landing a big right hand that stuns Tide! Saniti executes a picture perfect leg lariat that takes Tide off his feet, but only for a split second. Tide rolls away, charges the ropes, and attempts to springboard back with a flying elbow...but to his dismay, he's kicked clean out of the air by a superkick by Saniti! Tide is down and seeing stars, but Saniti is still trying to shake his own cobwebs out of his head, and remains down too.
Saniti is first up, and waits against the ropes for Tide to crawl back to his feet as well. A boot to the midsection is followed by a club to the back of the neck. Saniti executes a chin breaker which staggers Tide, who is taken off his feet shortly after by a standing dropkick. Nathan looks to be contemplating a pin, but decides instead to pull his opponent to his feet and whip him into the ropes first, planting him on his back once more with a corkscrew elbow! This time he goes for the cover.
1…
2...
Tide kicks out after two, and appears to be reeling after the flurry of offense by Nathan Saniti. The latter doesn't argue with the call, but does pull Tide to his feet only to drop him down once more with a snap suplex. Saniti jumps out, and bunny hops in a semi circle around Tide, before readying himself and attempting his standing moonsault. The March Hare harp is avoided as Tide rolls out of the way! Tide is up first, and dropkicks Saniti squarely in the temple as he favors his ribs! It's Tide's turn to use the momentum in his favor, and he stalks Saniti, waiting for him to regain his footing, only to leapfrog over his back and drop him down with force with an over the top DDT! High Tide feels the victory in his grasp, and makes the cover.
1…
2...
Saniti doesn't kick out, but the referee's hand doesn't come down. Tide looks around in confusion, to notice Saniti had the wherewithal to get his foot on the bottom rope! Tide is furious, and pulls Saniti to the middle of the ring to try another cover.
Jerry Andrews: Barely a one count. Tide is frustrated.
Saniti kicks out easily this time, and now Tide is fuming. Instead of arguing with the referee, however, he just shrugs his shoulders and rolls out of the ring. Moving to the announcers area, he kicks the timekeeper out of his steel chair and folds it up with a clap, before sliding back into the ring. The referee is having none of it, and starts a tug of war with Tide of the chair. After a threat of being disqualified that instant, Tide relinquishes his grasp and watches with dismay as the chair is tosses from the ring. As Tide argues with the referee again, trying to foolishly plead his innocence, he eventually turns...and is met by a flying Saniti, who comes off the second turnbuckle and takes him down with a blockbuster neckbreaker! Saniti is too weary to make a cover right away, but crawls over and does so after a moment.
1…
2...
Tide kicks out barely, and the fans are really starting to get into this match. Both men take their time getting to their feet, and arrive at the same time. Tide connects with a big right hand, and Saniti answers back! Tide! Saniti! Tide! Saniti! Tide! Tide! Tide! The pirate pushes Saniti back into the corner and mounts the second turnbuckle, laying into his opponent with big right hands. The referee is about to break up the ten count, but Saniti does it for him, pushing Tide off of him. Tide lands on his feet and turns around, hitting the ropes and attempting a big clothesline. Saniti scouts the move and ducks under his arm. When Tide rebounds, Saniti catches him with a huge tilt-a-whirl back breaker! Saniti is pumped up now, and after laying a few boots to the back of Tide's head, he pulls him up to his knees. As Tide gets to his feet, Saniti propels himself off the turnbuckle for a Will-o-the-Wisp, but High Tide pulls the referee in the way inadvertently, and the zebra takes the brunt of the blow. The referee is down, and High Tide uses the time to recover, still favoring his back from the back breaker. He rolls under the ropes to escape Saniti, who checks on the downed referee.
Ace Anderson: What’s Saniti thinking?
Saniti notices that Tide is still hurting, and plans to capitalize on it. He hits the ropes and dives through towards Tide for a suicide dive...but High Tide was scouting his every move. The chair he had grabbed earlier is in his hands, and he cracks it over the flying Saniti's skull! The ref is still down and doesn't see it!
Tide tries to pull Saniti up to his feet, but he's out like a light, and Tide's lower back is still screaming. It's quite the task, but eventually he rolls Saniti under the bottom rope. Sliding in, the pirate starts to rouse the referee, pulling him up and slapping him a few times until he wakes up. The ref is propped against the ropes, and Saniti is just starting to sir. Tide goes in for the kill, and goes for a spear...but Saniti rolls, using Tide's momentum to circle him around into the Unreality Check!
...but Tide isn't ready to give up just yet, and as Nathan falls downwards for the modified DDT finish, he's caught with a European uppercut! Spinning around his opponent, he attempts the Pirates Code...but Saniti rolls through, and starts shaking Tides head violently! Shaking Baby Syndrome! ...only halfway through the violent spasming, Tide powers out and hits a staggering headbutt that sends Saniti reeling. This time, Tide connects with the spear!
Enough of the half-assed pins, Tide must be thinking. The referee is now standing on his own, so Tide climbs wearily to the top turnbuckle, waiting patiently for Saniti to regain his footing. Nathan favors his ribs heavily, and still looks to be out of it from the chair shot. He reaches his feet though, and Tide flies off the ropes, looking for his shooting star DDT...but crashes and burns, hitting the mat hard! Saniti pounces on Tide, and locks in the Cheshire Grin! Tide is fighting it as hard as he can, and starts to claw his way to the bottom rope. Closer, closer...his fingers are almost grazing the rope itself when Saniti leaps up and lets all his weight fall square on his back! Nathan drags him back into the middle of the ring and reapplies the hold. Tide is still fighting! His hands are trying to pull Nathan's fingers out of his mouth, but to no avail. High Tide fought valiantly, but eventually taps out in defeat.
Jerry Andrews: Nigel Gale calls for the bell! This one is over!
Sasha Green: Your winner by Submission: Nathan Saniti!
Ace Anderson: Man! What a battle! Saniti and Tide can sure take it to each other when they want to.
The power cuts off inside the arena. No lights. No audio. Nothing but the sounds of silence. Unlike in times past of this event, there is no rushing surge of restoration. Maybe this actually isn’t part of the show you wonder.
Ace Anderson: ONE SHOW! I WANT ONE SHOW WHERE THE DAMNED LIGHTS GO OUT! IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?
Jerry Andrews: Dude! Do you need a hug?
And then the sight of a struck match on the tron says hello. All one can see is the shadowed features of a hand lowering it onto the wick of a candle. Like a hula dancer it dances from side to side, but otherwise the object remains stationary.
Audio returns.
The sounds of loud crashing. The sounds of unseen violence. The sounds of a dying agony.
This is what is allowed to filter into the subconscious of the faithful. They are spared the visuals of what is happening and to whom. The lone candle remaining their only source of warmth. Now the stage lights flash with reds, oranges and yellows. As if the candle was permitted a soul and decided to transfer its essence. But it moves in time with the lone image.
“Ecclesiastes Chapter Twelve, Verse Fourteen.”
You hear Seromine. But you don’t see him. He sounds more chilling than inviting with his tone.
“For God will bring every deed into judgment, including every hidden thing, whether it is good or evil.”
The candlelight is extinguished from the tron. Its partner on the stage is of the same fate, encapsulating everything in darkness for a period of ten seconds. The next time a candle is lit, it borders just enough to highlight what looks like a bloodstained, white, bucket hat. The item serves as an eclipse of sorts before being pulled away, so that the lowered head of an unconscious Andy D comes into sight. A crown of thorns has been jammed into his cranium.
“This is what he thinks of changed plans, Keliska. Do you even know who I took the International Title from, Richard? WE have come for YOUR Mass Destruction, sinners. Consider Andrew the warning shot.”
Just above the fan favorite’s head is a message in his blood (or one could safely assume to be the case).
MAJORS
Everything now returns to as it should in the arena. Loud boos clash like protestors with concern for Andy D’s immediate welfare as the live feed returns to a mortified Jerry Andrews and Ace Anderson.
Match Five
Singles Match
Eira vs. Whitey Ford
Referee: Joseph Buckland
Sasha Greene: The following is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, she weighs in at 160 lbs... EIRA!
The arena lights fade to near blackness, purple lights swirling over the crowd as fog rolls out from the stage. An eerie, wistful melody weaves its way through the assembled as a lone figure takes shape in the center of the stage, still obscured in the shadowy mist. At 0:12 of Rammstein’s "Wo Bist Du", heavy industrial bass explodes out of the PCW loudspeakers as purple sparks and violet pyros fire off along the stage, lights snapping to ful to reveal Eira!
"Ich liebe dich, ich liebe dich nicht
Ich liebe dich nicht mehr, ich liebe dich nicht mehr,"
Till Lindemann’s trademark growling resonance accompanies her down the ramp, her purposeful stride in perfect time to the percussive beat. The aggressive yet oddly hopeful chords storm across the PCW Faithful, Eira interacting with the crowd freely as she goes. Approaching ringside, she takes off at a full sprint, silver and black streaking towards the ring!
"Ich suche dich hinter dem Licht
Wo bist du,"
Eira flips forward, catching herself with her hands to launch herself in a handspring somersault, landing with balletic precision on the apron! Wiping her feet, she steps between the ropes and begins to stretch out with preternatural flexibility, waiting for the match to start.
Jerry Andrews: Since their mutual return in the same segment some months back, both Whitey Ford and Eira have taken very different career paths to reestablishing their names here.
Ace Anderson: More specifically, these two couldn't be more different than night and day, but last time they met, there seemed to be a grudging respect between them. We'll have to see if that continues tonight.
Sasha Greene: And her opponent, he weighs in at 245 lbs... "THE ASSHOLE", WHITEY FORD!
The southern style guitars of "Bad Man," by Bobaflex play over the PA system as strobe lights and the PCWtron flash white light to the beat of the bass drum. When the music picks up a bit, Ford slowly walks out onto the stage, arms stretched out wide to embrace the hate rained down upon him. Taking great amusement at the crowds disposition, Whitey trades words and insults with the more vocal fans before rolling under the bottom rope.
Ace Anderson: I think the thing about this match is that, the specter of their beef with Seromine is looming in the back of their minds.
Jerry Andrews: Very good point.
Referee Joseph Buckland orders the bell rung. Whitey and Eira both circle the ring before going for a tie-up. The air is electric, as the crowd is split on who to cheer for, and the two of them step up face to face. They exchange some tense words. They circle each other for a second, feeling each other out. The bad blood between them is palpable, but at the start neither one wants to make the first move. Eira shoots in for a tie-up, but the heavier Whitey immediately flings Eira halfway across the ring in a display of strength. Eira rolls to a crouched position and eyes the bigger Whitey warily. She comes back towards him for another tie-up, but gets thrown to the mat with the same result. Eira shakes her head in irritation, as she gets back up to her feet. She moves towards Whitey, who smirks a little at the size differential between them. Eira sweeps in and gives him a kick to the hamstring, then another, and another. She tries for one more, but Whitey grabs her foot and places a hand on her chest and tosses her back. Eira, dazed, pulls herself up on the ropes. Whitey tells her to come on.
Ace Anderson: There are some instances where you just have to remember Whitey likes to trade under the name "The Asshole".
Eira ducks under Whitey's outstretched hands and gives him a forearm shot to the mouth, then she lights up his legs with a few kicks, including a straight stomp right on the knee. Eira backs up to the ropes, but Whitey gives Eira a back drop that sends her sailing high into the air and crashing down on the mat. Eira shouts in pain and holds her lower back.
Ace Anderson: Whitey just gave Eira some flying lessons!
Whitey lifts her up with ease and plants Eira with a scoop slam. Eira grits her teeth and hisses in pain, as she holds her lower back. Whitey lifts Eira back up, clubbing her over the back a few times, which completely floors Eira. Whitey irish whips her to the ropes, and as she comes back off Whitey swings for a clothesline but Eira ducks under it and keeps running to the opposite ropes. She flings herself at Whitey for a Thesz press, but Whitey catches onto her in midair, holding her in a bear hug of sorts before lowering her across his knee with a Manhattan drop. Eira sits down on Whitey's knee, as Whitey pulls her into a facelock and drops her to the mat with a DDT. Whitey then rolls over on top of Eira, attempting to lock on a standing camel clutch submission. Eira reaches out quickly and scoots to the ropes before the hold can be fully applied. Joseph tells Whitey to break the hold and he does, holding his hands up innocently. Whitey lifts Eira up, and whips her into the corner. He comes in looking for a corner splash but Eira quickly slips out so that she's halfway onto the apron, sitting on the middle rope with her legs out. Whitey hits the turnbuckle and staggers backwards. He turns towards Eira, to one side, and she tilts back and brings her legs up, connecting right in his face. Whitey stumbles back, and Eira gets back into the ring. She gets a running start and then dropkicks Whitey right in the knee.
Jerry Andrews: I think Eira has found her own strategy as a way to take Whitey down.
Eira grabs Whitey's leg and hooks his foot under her arm as if for a DDT and then drops back, slamming in on the mat. Whitey grimaces and holds his leg and knee. Eira straightens the leg out and then drops a knee across the leg. Then she puts all her weight on it as she grabs his foot and bends upwards, twisting it. Whitey groans and tries to push her off. He reaches for her, but she moves back out of his reach. Joseph asks if Whitey gives up, but Whitey says no. Whitey swings at her, but again Eira moves her head back, as she continues twisting upwards on his leg. Again, Joseph asks if Whitey will give up, but he refuses. Finally, Eira releases the hold. She gets to her feet and gives Whitey a low straight kick right to the sternum as he sits up. After she knocks Whitey down on the mat, she runs off the ropes, then hits him with a leg drop. Whitey rolls around, holding his throat. Eira pins him.
1... Kickout.
Whitey gets to one knee, as Eira boots him down a little. Eira gets to her feet, giving a rising Whitey a few kicks, but on her last attempt he catches her foot. He gets to his feet, holding her leg, and then spins her around, and when she fully turns he knocks her back down with a clothesline. Whitey lifts Eira up and whips her into the corner. Eira at the last second is able to spring up to the top turnbuckle, set herself, and she attempts to fly off with a moonsault. Whitey gets up, catching her across his shoulder in mid-flight, and then he turns and plants her with a running powerslam. Whitey runs to the ropes, and he goes for a jumping elbow drop, but his opponent suddenly isn't there and he hits harder than he would've liked. Whitey rolls around, holding his elbow. Eira meets him with a running dropkick to the temple. Whitey is dazed and he rolls all the way to the ring apron. Eira paces around a little, and then she walks over, pulling Whitey up and between the ropes back into the ring. Suddenly, Whitey comes out with a European uppercut that nearly knocks her head off. Whitey gets to his feet, limping a bit. Whitey turns Eira around and clubs her over the back. He hooks her head and lifts her up into a vertical suplex. He holds on for a moment, stalling and turning her around as he holds her up in the air in a display of strength, before bringing her crashing down to the mat. Whitey plants Eira into the mat with another scoop slam. His face is deadly serious as he paces around, staring at her. Whitey pulls Eira back up into a waist-lock, and begins giving her a German suplex. Eira scrambles over to the ropes and grabs on to the top rope, holding on for dear life and attempting to block it. Whitey clubs her across the back a few times, as he tries to suplex her, but she hangs on. Joseph tells them to break it up out of the ropes. Whitey and Joseph argue for a moment, as Eira continues holding onto the ropes. Whitey finally turns back to Eira, who slips out onto the apron and gives Whitey a kick to the midsection. Eira then grips Whitey's head and pulls it down, hanging him up throat first on the top rope. Whitey goes stumbling back, holding his throat. Eira gets back in the ring and takes Whitey down with a tilt-a-whirl head scissors. Eira waits for Whitey to recover, and she attempts to give him a leg drop bulldog, but Whitey ducks his head under it and waits until her leg is perpendicular to his head and then he grip onto it, as he gets to his feet, lifting her up onto his shoulders and countering into an electric chair drop.
Jerry Andrews: The action has been coming fast and furious between the two of them so far.
Ace Anderson: Well, as my easy listening station on Pandora reminded me, it's only just begun.
Jerry Andrews: I... would not have pegged you for a Carpenters fan.
Ace Anderson: It... I was trying to smoothly segue there!!
Whitey lifts Eira off the canvas and gives her a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker, leaving Eira laying across his knee. Whitey then lifts Eira as he stands up, and drops her with a back suplex. Whitey walks away towards one of the corners as Eira slowly makes her way to her feet, and as Whitey circles around he nails Eira with a big boot to the face that sends her off her feet. Eira lays on the mat, dazed and not knowing where she is. Whitey lifts Eira back up and whips her off the ropes. As Eira bounces off the ropes, Whitey lifts her up onto her shoulder before dropping her with a powerslam. Whitey covers...
1...
2... Kickout.
He puts her head between his legs, motioning that it's over. Whitey lifts her up, going for a powerbomb, but Eira begins pounding on his head, making Whitey stagger over towards the ropes with Eira on his shoulders. When they get to the ropes, Eira performs a sort of hurricanrana, pulling Whitey down throat first across the top rope. Whitey staggers away, holding his throat, and then he drops to his knees. Eira springs off the ropes and takes him down with a tornado DDT. Whitey is staring straight up at the lights. Eira rolls outside the ring to recuperate. Whitey follows right behind her. After a moment, Eira starts to get to her feet. She makes her way around the ring. Whitey pursues Eira around the ring. Eira comes around the corner where the announcer table is, and she jumps on the corner of the table just as Whitey comes around the corner by the ringpost. Eira jumps back with a springboard forearm knocking her back against the barricade and knocking Whitey back against the ringpost. Whitey then launches himself forward going for a clothesline, but Eira ducks and Ford gets nothing but ringpost. As Whitey backs away from the turnbuckle holding his shoulder, Eira takes him down to the padded floor with a springboard leg scissors off the ring apron. Whitey rolls to the outside, and Joseph Buckland is counting them both out. Eira rolls back in the ring, staring at Whitey with intense focus. Whitey, meanwhile, is pulling himself up. Eira goes for a baseball slide, but Whitey moves out of the way and lets Eira go by her. Whitey goes for a clothesline, but again Eira ducks. Whitey and Eira both rise to a standing position as Whitey wraps his arms around Eira's waist and powers her into the ring apron with force, as Eira screams. Joseph has begun counting them out again. Whitey drags a limp Eira over to the announce table and begins clearing it off. Jerry Andrews and Ace Anderson scatter. Whitey scoop slams Eira onto the announce table, then he walks over and climbs onto the Spanish announce table, gets a running start and gives her a big running leg drop on top of the announce table, splattering Eira, but the table maintains it's integrity. Whitey, eyes wide, blows out a whoof of breath from all the effort expended.
Ace Anderson: You spilled my macchiato! You heathens!
Jerry Andrews: The action continues out here in the aisle, Whitey is close to losing the count here!
Joseph is at a count of 8. Whitey quickly walks over and rolls in the ring and back out to break the count. Whitey then rolls Eira back into the ring before entering the ring himself. Eira grabs him by his arm and attempts to whip him to the ropes, but Whitey resists by planting his feet. He sends her into the far ropes with everything he has. Eira hits the ropes fast, so fast in fact that Whitey can't get to his feet completely by the time she returns, and she grabs Whitey around the neck before hitting a spinning neckbreaker on him in the middle of the ring. Eira then goes for a Lionsault, but Whitey gets his knees up and Eira hits midsection first across his upstretched knees. Whitey then pulls the dazed Eira to her feet as she locks her into an abdominal stretch. Eira groans in pain. The bigger Whitey has Eira bent into an uncomfortable position. Eira reaches out for the ropes but she can't move any closer. Finally, Eira brings her foot down and stomps on Whitey's foot. She does it again, and Whitey finally releases the hold just enough for her to drop down and bring her leg up to connect with his face in a Pele kick. Eira drops to all fours as Whitey stumbles back. Eira pulls herself up, and then she runs to the ropes and when she comes back, Whitey catches her and slams her to the canvas with a spinebuster. Whitey then grips her legs and turns her over into a Boston crab.
Jerry Andrews: Look at all that weight on Eira's back as Whitey twists her body like a pretzel.
Ace Anderson: Eira has been struggling to establish herself as she once was, and that didn't end so well, either. She should just give up while she's ahead.
Jerry Andrews: I think you know that Eira is determined not to give up again.
Eira shouts in pain and flails her arms around frantically. Whitey sits back on the hold. Joseph asks Eira if she gives up. Eira shouts "No!". Whitey increases the pressure, and she screams, then bites her hand to keep from screaming. The crowd is chanting "Eira" over and over. She tries to crawl the short distance towards the ropes, but Whitey's weight on her back won't let her budge. Eira can't help but to scream at the pressure on her back.
Ace Anderson: And to think, Whitey Ford's mean streak hasn't been as pronounced since he's been sober.
Jerry Andrews: Brother, if all of this was done without any sort of mean streak, I don't know what else we would be seeing.
Eira finally inches forward just enough and pulls herself out, and grabs the bottom rope. Joseph tells Whitey to break the hold. Whitey aggressively holds on for just a moment. Finally, he gets to his feet. He and Joseph argue for a moment. Eira gets to her feet at about the same time, only Eira is holding her lower back. Whitey walks over toward Eira, and Eira quickly gives him a spinning back kick to the gut, then jumps up onto the middle rope before jumping up onto Whitey's shoulder and spinning him around in a circle before dropping him to the canvas with a tornado DDT. Eira rests, grimacing and holding her lower back. She slowly gets to her feet. Eira attempts to lift Whitey up, and goes for a snap suplex, but she is unable to due to Whitey's size and her weakened lower back. Whitey lifts Eira up in a hanging chokehold, but Eira quickly kicks him in the side of the head as she tries to grab him, and then as she falls Eira trips Whitey over like a drop toe hold. Eira then applies a falling leglock, contorting Whitey's knee painfully. Whitey screams, and flails her arms. Joseph asks Whitey if he gives up, but Whitey refuses. Finally, Eira releases the hold. Eira gets to her feet in a bit of pain, and then as Whitey pulls himself up he eats several kicks to the hamstring, and then to the midsection. Whitey shoves Eira away, and Eira runs off the ropes, only to be caught and spun around with a side slam. Whitey covers...
1...
2... Kickout.
Whitey stalks Eira as she gets to her feet. Whitey then gives her a gutwrench shoulder backbreaker. He paces around the mat for a second before walking over to the turnbuckle. Then he climbs up onto the middle turnbuckle and jumps off backwards, flinging his legs out and going for a corner slingshot splash but at the last second Eira rolls out of the way. Whitey hits the mat chest first, and he starts pulling himself up on all fours, holding his chest. Then Eira quickly takes his head off with a buzzsaw kick. Eira paces around, holding her back, and Whitey once again gets to a crouched position, as Eira comes running in and gives him a low double-footed dropkick to the side of the head. Eira goes for a cover.
1...
2... Kickout.
Eira waits for Whitey to get to his feet, and then doubles Whitey over with a spinning back kick to the midsection, then she runs off the ropes and hits a running variation of a double knee facebuster, dropping Whitey's face down on her knees. Eira then follows up by running to the ropes, hopping up to the second rope and springing off with a hands-free Asai moonsault, this time connecting across Whitey's chest. Eira holds on for the cover.
Jerry Andrews: Unique flurry of offense by Eira!
1...
2... Kickout.
Eira wraps her legs around Whitey's throat in a headscissor submission. She begins squeezing with all of her might. Whitey slowly begins looking like he's fading out as Eira increases the pressure. Joseph asks if he gives up. Whitey shakes his finger no, but he can't answer as his wind is being cut off. His face is turning bright red. Eira shouts for him to give up, and squeezes her legs tighter. Whitey continues to try and pull himself over to release some of the pressure. Eira then floats over, grabs both of Whitey's arms and twists him into a straight jacket hold. Whitey's eyes bulge as his face starts turning red.
Jerry Andrews: Eira has the Purgatory submission locked in!
Ace Anderson: I'm sure Whitey would be in for the requisite wailing in torment, if there was blood flowing into his head.
Eira hauls back on the submission. Joseph asks Whitey if he gives up. Whitey shakes his head no, but he's starting to fade. The crowd is getting behind Whitey slowly but surely, and then he starts pulling himself up. He twists around so that he's on his knees. Eira is still straight-jacketing the arms around his throat, and she pushes a knee in his back, trying to force him back down into the full submission, but at last Whitey pulls himself up so she's hanging onto his back with the choke applied, and then Whitey flips her over his shoulder with a judo throw. Eira rests in the corner, catching her breath, and Whitey also takes a few deep gasps of air. Eira aggressively pursues Whitey in now and Eira grabs Whitey by the hair, executing a hair pull into a backbreaker over the knee that she has her knee brace on. Whitey rolls around on the mat holding his lower back because ouch. Eira scoots over into a pin with the leg hooked.
1...
2... Kickout!
Eira tries going back to the Purgatory submission, but Whitey fights her off as soon as she grips the arms, not letting her grapevine them around him again. He slides back between her legs, pulling her off balance. Eira, changing tactics, backs up into the ropes, and then Whitey swings at her for a clothesline but she ducks and keeps running, going right into the corner and running up the turnbuckles until she is on the top rope, then she turns and flies off with a crossbody. However, Whitey catches her in position to give her a front powerslam, then he flings her overhead with a fallaway slam. Eira is thrown across the ring, and lands on the apron. Whitey walks back over and grips her by the head, and throws her back in the ring. Eira holds her lower back and contorts around. Whitey whips Eira into the corner and follows her in with a corner clothesline. Eira slumps limply in the corner, as Whitey backs up to the middle of the ring and charges in, then nearly cuts her in half with a corner spear. Eira stumbles out, holding her midsection, then flops down into a seated position in the corner at the bottom turnbuckle and Whitey comes charging in and gives her a running corner knee strike while she's in a seated position. Whitey then pulls a nearly lifeless Eira out and pins her.
1...
2...
3... Kickout.
Jerry Andrews: I don't think Whitey even knew just how much effort he would have to put out to defeat Eira.
Ace Anderson: She refuses to go down!
Whitey grits his teeth and argues with Joseph, telling him it was three. Joseph assures him Eira kicked out. Whitey has an intense look on his face as he lifts Eira up. He boots her in the gut and attempts to give her a powerbomb. He lifts her up in the air. Suddenly, she reverses into a victory roll pin. Joseph count the pin.
Jerry Andrews: She may have surprised the Asshole here!
1...
2...
3... Kickout.
Eira slowly gets to her feet, and gives Whitey a few kicks. Eira boots Whitey in the gut and grips his head for a standing shiranui, but at the last second as she flips herself up he pulls his head loose and grips on to her, bringing her down across his knee with a harsh backbreaker. Whitey then lifts Eira up and plants her with a fireman’s carry front slam. Whitey sinks down, and covers Eira.
Jerry Andrews: There it is, the Wasted Land!
1...
2...
3... Kickout.
Ace Anderson: Man, Eira is really showing me something.
Jerry Andrews: I know, she has shown a lot of heart in giving Whitey this test.
Whitey grits his feet in frustration at Eira and he lifts her up, clubbing her over the back, which knocks her down subsequently. Then Whitey blasts Eira with the falling enziguri to the back of the head, the Hangover from Hell. Not finished yet, Whitey grips and lifts him up onto his shoulders for a crucifix, about to finish her off, but as he pulls her up, she pulls loose in midair and twists around behind Whitey, kicking him in the back of the leg and then as he drops to one knee, she runs and uses his knee as a springboard to hit a shining wizard right to the temple. Whitey drops down to the mat. Eira rests, using the ropes to hold herself up, and motions for Whitey to get up, and when he does, shaking the cobwebs out, Eira spikes him into the mat with a zigzag like maneuver. Then, Eira flops against the turnbuckle adjacent to her, gathering a few gasps of air. She climbs to the top as quick as she can and hops off with a diving double foot stomp right to the sternum! Eira drops down for a pin.
Jerry Andrews: And Eira BLASTS Whitey with Fall of the Morning Star! What a match we've had so far!
Ace Anderson: I think it might be over, because that stomp might have just been like when you smash a tube of toothpaste flat with a hammer and it explodes at both ends.
Jerry: That is... by far the grossest analogy you've ever made.
Ace Anderson: Somebody check him, as all I'm saying, he looks flat in the middle.
1...
2...
3... Kickout.
Eira yells in frustration. She attempts to lift Whitey up to irish whip him again, but again, he resists and whips her into the corner. Eira hits the corner chest first. Whitey takes a moment to recover, then he charges into the corner, looking to splash Eira from behind, but Eira sees him coming out of the corner of her eye. She quickly hops up so that she is sitting on the ringpost and turnbuckle, with her legs out in the aisle, and Whitey hits the turnbuckle himself and staggers, then slumps in the corner, facing out into the middle of the ring. Then, Eira pushes her off and performs a modified split legged moonsault, but as she falls down she grips Whitey's head and drops down to the mat in a seated position with a sitout facebuster from the top rope. The crowd pops at this innovative move, and Eira hooks the leg, going for a cover.
1...
2...
3... Kickout.
Eira runs off the ropes and then wrap her legs around Whitey, going for a wheelbarrow transition bulldog maneuver but Whitey grips onto her legs, lifting her up, and then planting her forcefully into the mat with a wheelbarrow facebuster. Eira groans, and holds her midsection in pain. Whitey rests with an arm over the ropes. He eggs Eira to get to her feet, and then as she gets to one knee Whitey shoots in and hooks her head, then pulls her down into a desperation guillotine choke! Eira's eyes widen. Whitey pulls back on the hold, his head bobbing back and forth as he tightens his legs around the midsection. The crowd is getting behind Eira. The ref asks Eira if she gives up, but she shouts, "NO!" Whitey shouts for her to give up, but Eira refuses. Slowly, she begins to fade from the pressure on her, cutting off her air. Joseph starts to lift her arm, but she jerks it back. She motions that she isn't done yet. Whitey settles back on the hold, increasing the pressure, and Eira yells out in pain. Eira tries to crawl to the ropes, but they're just out of reach.
Jerry Andrews: Whitey has the Deep Guillotine locked in. Eira is fighting with everything she has not to give up.
Ace Anderson: When you're in this position, you will do anything to avoid being labelled a little baby quitter.
Rocking the hold side to side as best she can over the space of the next few moments, Eira pulls herself closer to the bottom rope, stretching out as far as she can. Finally, after several more tense seconds in the hold during which brain cells are dying left and right, Whitey releases the hold, seeing that she won't give up. He attempts to pull her back into the center of the ring and apply the hold, but she slips out from between his legs and quickly grabs on to the rope. Joseph comes between them to make sure nothing happens while Eira grabs the rope. Whitey backs off, and Eira comes out of the ropes, and as Whitey swings for a clothesline, Eira ducks under it, boots him in the kneecap to knock his legs out from under him, and blasts him with a Boma-Ye style knee strike right across the face. An exhausted Eira makes the pin.
1...
2...
3... Kickout.
Eira can't believe it. She tells Joseph that had to be three, but he assures her it was two. The crowd has dueling, "Let's go Whitey, Let's go Eira" chants starting up. Eira shouts for Whitey to get up, and she goes for a hurricanrana, but as she does he pulls his head from under her leg and hits her with a clothesline while she's still in mid-jump that makes her do a flip or two in the air before crashing to the mat. Whitey shakes the cobwebs out, then runs a thumb across his throat. As Eira is getting to her feet, Whitey runs off the ropes perpendicular to her and meets her from the side with a cross-connecting spear at an odd angle, taking her nearly out of her boots.
Jerry Andrews: And there's the Rehab Spear.
Ace Anderson: Both of these competitors have pulled from the deep well for this match.
He starts to go for another pin, but then aggressively shakes his head and says he's not done. He jerks Eira up to her feet and wraps her in another waist-lock and this time succeeds in giving her a German suplex, then another, then another, giving her a series of eight German suplexes in all before releasing her with the last one, which sends her flying across the ring and landing awkwardly on her head and neck. Eira sinks down to the mat. Whitey walks over and then he gets a running start, hitting a running senton across the ribs, and he rolls her over for a cover.
1...
2...
3... Kickout.
Jerry Andrews: How are they both doing this?!
Ace Anderson: Both Whitey and Eira refuse to give up!
Jerry Andrews: There's too much at stake for both of them to go down in this match.
Whitey puts his hands over his face in disbelief and runs his hands through his hair, staring at Eira intensely. Whitey snarls, and he shakes his head, seeing that there's only one way to put her down. He makes a "That's it" motion and he paces over to the top rope. He starts calling for his diving senton. But all the damage Eira did to his leg is slowing him down, as he takes several vital seconds pulling himself up and then turning to get set to move off the top rope. By this time, Eira has sprung to life and she ascends the turnbuckle right alongside Whitey, and before either of them can fall off she rips him right off the top turnbuckle with a reverse top rope hurricanrana, dropping the unlucky bastard on the top of his head as she spills to the mat!
Jerry Andrews: OH MY GOD I THINK SHE KILLED WHITEY!
Ace Anderson: She calls that Wreath of Barbs, but I think I'll call it a Whitey Whacker.
Eira is slumped over several feet from Whitey Ford, who is turned over and staring straight up at the lights. Neither of them is able to move for precious seconds, turning into a minute. The crowd is going insane. Thunderous "THIS IS AWESOME" chants are raining down from the rafters. Joseph Buckland is making a decision whether to start counting them out before he starts, 1... 2... 3... 4... Eira is able to bring herself back to life, and she crawls agonizingly over to Whitey and drapes over him for a cover.
Jerry Andrews: I think she took too long to get to the cover... does she have Whitey here?
1...
2...
3... NO!
Eira, exhausted, flops face first onto the mat and slams her fist. Whitey grits his teeth and holds his neck, which sustained serious damage in the fall. Both competitors have to take some precious time to gather their bearings. The crowd is dueling, "Let's go Eira, Let's go Whitey."
Jerry Andrews: Both of these competitors have put it all on the line, for the sake of nothing but pride tonight.
Ace Anderson: I think it's going to come down to a war of who is willing to give it all and lose.
Eira is the first to take a knee, then she gets to her feet, and as Whitey Ford pulls himself up, Eira grips him by the head and drops him with a reverse STO, floating it over into a rarely seen Koji clutch submission! Whitey can't push Eira off, as he pulls his head back with her leg and increases the pressure. Joseph asks Whitey if he gives up, and as best he can he shakes his head. The crowd is going crazy for this as Eira hangs on to the Koji clutch with all her might. Whitey tries to pull himself to the ropes, but they're in the center or the ring. He looks around him, trying to gauge where he is in the ring. Eira pulls back with her leg as the layer under that she squeezes with her arms, and she is slowly cutting off Whitey's air circulation. Whitey's face is contorted with pain, as he tries pulling himself backwards to get out of the hold.
Ace Anderson: Holy crap, Eira's got that locked in tight.
Jerry Andrews: It's a variation of a sleeper hold, it's basically cutting off Whitey's wind circulation and putting him to sleep.
Whitey's arms starting going limp. He tries to pull himself backwards, and his leg is almost touching the rope behind him. Joseph checks his arm, but Whitey waves him off. Whitey's face is turning bright red. He slaps the mat in frustration and his head snaps up as if he's trying to stay conscious, but his head is starting to droop. Eira yells with effort as she pulls back with her arms and her leg, and tightens the hold like a noose. Whitey reaches out, and he's still trying to kick his leg back, and finally, he is able to drape it on the bottom rope. Joseph asks him again if he wants to give up, and starts checking to see if he's being put out. Whitey refuses again, but his effort is growing weaker. Eira feels Whitey go limp, and she releases the hold, celebrating... but then she notices Whitey has his foot in the ropes.
Jerry Andrews: Eira may have choked Whitey into submission, but he still managed a rope break.
Ace Anderson: Now he's a big lump of dead weight, I'm not sure if this benefits her or not!
Eira tries lifting the lifeless body of Whitey and positioning him into the middle of the ring. Being dead weight, she is having a hard time dragging him, due to the fatigue and the pain, the toll the match has taken on her. Eira takes a few gasps of air, and pulls Whitey by his arm and his leg. She then turns her head to say something to the referee about grabbing the hair, and then when she goes back to drag Whitey again he surprises her by pulling her down into an inside cradle.
Ace Anderson: I thought he might have been out cold, that guy really is an asshole, do you know that?
Jerry Andrews: Inside cradle! He may have her caught!
1...
2...
3... NO!
Whitey sits up, looking with a sanguine expression at the crowd and back at his opponent, as the crowd is willing them both on. He snarls and grits his teeth, getting up to his feet. He slowly paces over to the ropes, pulls himself up to sit on the top rope, and then he flies off as fast as he can get set, coming down dead center across the ribs with a Diving Senton. Eira is flattened like she had been hit by a truck. She rolls around, holding her ribs.)
Ace Anderson: That move is made all the more devastating by the added weight of Whitey Ford coming down full force from the top rope.
Now it's Whitey's turn to rest for several precious seconds, but he gets it together enough to scramble over and hook the leg of Eira.)
1...
2...
3 -
NO!
Jerry Andrews: EIRA KICKED OUT! EIRA KICKED OUT!
Ace Anderson: Jesus Christo, what more can either one of these guys do, they've pulled out every trick in the book.
Jerry Andrews: These two know each other so well, they've gone deep into their arsenal to put each other away.
Whitey, angry now, shoots up to his feet and starts getting in the referee's face. Joseph tells Whitey that he counted fairly. Whitey is frothing at the mouth now, and he grabs the referee's shirt.
Jerry Andrews: Uh oh, I think Whitey's temper is finally getting the better of him.
Ace Anderson: Come on, Whitey, if there was one time in your life to please not be an asshole, it's right now.
The ref and Whitey Ford have a tense exchange where the ref tells him to respect and uphold his authority or he'll be thrown out. Whitey Ford looks for a second like he's weighing the merits of decking him. But then, he thinks better of it, and turns back to spot Eira, but she is nowhere in his field of vision behind him. Whitey is sorely confused, until Eira comes from behind him out of his peripheral vision and pushes him chest first into the ropes. Whitey springs back and is pulled out of his base into an O'connor roll up, taking him by surprise. Joseph drops down for the count.
1...
2...
3!!!
Ding Ding Ding!
The referee immediately calls for the bell. Whitey picks himself up and he stares a hole in the referee, then at Eira, who is pulling herself up and having her hand raised.
Jerry Andrews: Whitey can't believe what just happened!!
Ace Anderson: Hell with that, I can't believe what just happened, Whitey let Eira get just out of his field of vision and she rolls him up?!
Sasha Greene: Here is your winner... EIRA!!!
Whitey stands to his feet, and he looks across at Eira. The two of them have a tense face to face, as the referee raises her hand up. Whitey looks like he might be pissed at Eira for taking advantage of a blind spot, but then he just looks irritated at himself. Eira nods in understanding, and she holds her hand out to him. Whitey looks at her with a bemused expression.
Jerry Andrews: Now we'll see how much of an asshole Whitey is now, or if he can accept the reality of what happened.
To Eira's surprise, Whitey takes Eira's hand and lifts it up in victory. He nods his assent to what happened. Eira grins, and nods respectfully and thankfully to the Asshole. She raises his arm in return, and the crowd is going crazy.
Ace Anderson: Quite a show of respect.
As the two of them start to separately leave the ring, "Wo Bist Du" by Rammstein queues up on the PA. But after a few moments of the song, he lights go dark in the arena, with Eira's theme music replaced by childlike but distorted giggling grating out of the speaker system.
Jerry Andrews: Wh- What is this?!
The lights are off in the arena for a good few intense moments, as figures moving on the entrance ramp can be seen in the dark. When the lights click back on, Whitey and Eira are standing together in the ring, ready for whatever's coming. But there, standing on the stage, SEROMINE and his flock of followers are standing on the stage. There's a tense stand off, as neither side makes a move, but the preacher stands there, grinning wickedly down at Eira and Whitey Ford.
Jerry Andrews: Oh my! Things might get a little nasty here.
Ace Anderson: This is creeping me out, Seromine and his church are just staring a hole in Eira and Whitey.
Seromine holds his arms out in supplication. The tension is thick between both sides, but neither makes a move. Still, Seromine continues to stare from the stage at Whitey and Eira, who lean in close to each other and confer what they should do.
Jerry Andrews: I am mildly disturbed by this turn of events, and so are Eira and Whitey.
Ace Anderson: You said it, partner.
Jerry Andrews: Is it wise for Seromine to piss off Whitey and Eira when his match is next?
Ace Anderson: Nice segue. Seromine has his cult at the top of the ramp. I’m pretty sure it would be wiser for Ford and Eira to take a different path.
A plethora of security flood the rampway, directing Seromine and his cultists to remove themselves and get ready for their match. After a few minutes of reluctant protest, the path is cleared. Eira and Ford both step out of the ring, a bit relieved that they can exit without incident.
Sasha Green: Ladies and gentlemen, the following triple threat match is scheduled for one fall and is for the PCW International Championship!
The crowd cheers.
Jerry Andrews: Seromine has been a dominant International Champion but tonight he’ll have to face off against two competitors who not only want his title, but also have personal vendettas against him.
Ace Anderson: You’re right that Seromine has been dominant, and he’s held the International Title for a very long time, but I feel like that reign is in jeopardy here tonight.
Sasha Green: Introducing first, the challengers…
”(Hard Dance) Hero (Monstercat Release)" by Pegboard Nerds (feat. Elizaveta) comes shimmering out of the PCW loudspeakers as rainbow spotlights flicker over the entryway.
“Hero hero...
Hero hero...
Hero hero...
I wanna be a hero, hero...”
Hero hero...
Hero hero...
I wanna be a hero, hero...”
The bass kicks in and the multicolored spotlights snap to the top of the ramp, neon pink pyros sparking off as Dollface appears! Dancing and bouncing she makes her way to the ring, posing for selfies with fans, giving high fives, having herself a rave party on her way! She reaches ringside and hops up onto the apron, wiping her boots before stepping between the ropes and playing it up for the crowd while she waits for her opponents.
Sasha Green: ….. currently in the ring: “DOLLFACE” KELLI STARR!
Jerry Andrews: Kelli Starr’s longstanding feud with Seromine has been brutal and personal. She got the best of the International Champion a few weeks ago on Trauma and now she hopes to walk out of here with the gold.
Ace Anderson: Kelli Starr’s been on a roll lately and she’s looked good heading into this match. Seromine’s days as champion could be numbered!
The lights go out. Suddenly the sound of guitars pierce through the silence as "Wastelands" by Linkin Park begins to play. Rick Majors appears in the entrance way. He pauses for a moment and looks down briefly. He then shakes his head, breathes deeply and stares out at the crowd, stretching his arms and warming up as he walks down to the ring.
"This is war with no weapons,
Marching with no stepping,
Murder with no killing,
Illing every direction."
Marching with no stepping,
Murder with no killing,
Illing every direction."
Majors walks slowly, looking out around the arena as he continues his way down to the ring.
Sasha Green: And, from Toronto, Ontario, Canada....
In the wastelands of today,
When there's nothing left to lose,
And and there's nothing more to take,
But you force yourself to choose,
In the wastelands of today,
When tomorrow disappears
When the future slips away,
And your hope turns into fear,
In the wastelands of today.
When there's nothing left to lose,
And and there's nothing more to take,
But you force yourself to choose,
In the wastelands of today,
When tomorrow disappears
When the future slips away,
And your hope turns into fear,
In the wastelands of today.
Majors climbs the ring steps and pauses. He turns towards the crowd, standing on the ring apron for a moment before entering the ring. Majors stands in the centre of the ring, looking out towards the crowd. He slowly starts to circle the ring, stretching and loosening up his body.
Sasha Green: ... RICK MAJORS!
The lights in the arena then come back on as Majors circles the ring, awaiting the start of the match.
Jerry Andrews: Majors had a one-on-one match with Seromine on the show following Kelli Starr’s victory and he wasn’t quite as successful, falling to Seromine. He lobbied hard to get into this title match and it apparently he was successful because here he is.
Ace Anderson: Rick Majors has held titles all over the world, but never in PCW and he desperately wants to change that.
Jerry Andrews: One thing I’m looking for in this match is how Majors and Starr get along. They’ve teamed up several times in the past and even competed in a tag team match against Seromine and Destiny, so they certainly have experience being allies.
Ace Anderson: That’s true and I think we’ll see them team up in this match, at least at the start. But, remember, there can only be one winner and one International Champion.
The lights inside of the arena begin to flicker in and out like that of a potential power outage.
Jerry Andrews: And speaking of the International Champion….
Within seconds blinding white light flashes and then plunges the faithful into darkness. A sudden candlelight spotlight shines below the stage. Three children who look no older than between seven to ten years old have appeared. All three are dressed in white. Two girls are shown swinging a jump rope as their male counterpart does the jumping. In unison, the three recite this famous bedtime prayer for all to hear:
Now I lay me down to sleep
I pray Salvation my soul to keep
If I should die before I wake
I pray Seromine my soul to take.
I pray Salvation my soul to keep
If I should die before I wake
I pray Seromine my soul to take.
Murmurs begin in the crowd as the children giggle and run off into the darkness. The sound of a piano and finger snapping turn the ramp into a stained-glass portrait like you would see in a church window. Bringing Seromine out from ground level is “Where Could I Go But to the Lord” by Elvis Presley. While walking close to his wife, Destiny, he walks up the stairs and across the stage just as the first verses start:
Living below in this old sinful world
Hardly a comfort can afford
Striving alone to face temptation so
Now won't you tell me
Hardly a comfort can afford
Striving alone to face temptation so
Now won't you tell me
Seromine is dressed as a preacher. His black hat matches the color of his ribbon bow tie, coat and slacks. She is seen wearing a black dress with a white collar and carrying his bible. The two walk down the ramp.
Where could I go but to the Lord?
Where could I go oh where could I go?
Seeking the refuge for my soul
Needing a friend to save me in the end
Won't you tell me
Where could I go but to the Lord?
Where could I go oh where could I go?
Seeking the refuge for my soul
Needing a friend to save me in the end
Won't you tell me
Where could I go but to the Lord?
Seromine can be heard yelling, “everything will be ok now, your savior is here!” The booing doesn’t phase him at all, and if you were to ask the cult leader, he’d likely say “that’s sin being driven from their souls!”
Seromine now circles around the ring. Seromine removes his hat, mask, and coat. His long stringy hair hangs loose in front of his face. With crazed eyes and a devilish smile, he demands his faithful in attendance to “REPENT!!” as the house lights return to normal.
Sasha Green: And, he is the PCW International Champion: SEROMINE!
Jerry Andrews: You’ll notice that Seromine’s Followers are not out here with him tonight.
Ace Anderson: I’ve been told that was Seromine’s request, not a decision that came from PCW officials. And it’s an interesting one to say the least, especially with the threat he’s facing here tonight.
Jerry Andrews: Well, like him or not, Seromine hasn’t been one to duck challenges during his International Title reign.
Match Six
For the International Title
Single Pinfall Triple Threat Match
Rick Majors vs. “Dollface” Kelli Starr vs. Seromine ©
Referee: Ed Lane
For the International Title
Single Pinfall Triple Threat Match
Rick Majors vs. “Dollface” Kelli Starr vs. Seromine ©
Referee: Ed Lane
The bell rings and Majors immediately charges at Seromine. He comes at him with a clothesline that Seromine ducks at the last second. He isn’t so lucky with Dollface though, as she connects with a big right hand that drops him to the mat.
Majors pulls Seromine up off of the canvas and backs him into the corner. Seromine shoves him back and steps out of the corner, but he’s hit with a big spear by Starr! Seromine rolls under the bottom rope to catch his breath.
Majors and Starr stand in the ring, mocking him and waiting for him to return.
Jerry Andrews: It looks like Starr and Majors are certainly on the same page here tonight. And that page reads “Take out Seromine together first.”
Ace Anderson: It certainly looks that way now, but, as I mentioned earlier, the International Title is on the line and there can only be one winner! We’ll see how long this lasts.
Majors gets sick of waiting for Seromine and he slides out of the ring after him. Seromine backs away and then rolls back into the ring.
Jerry Andrews: It looks like Seromine wants no part of Rick Majors right now. Or he’s playing mind games.
Ace Anderson: I’d bet it’s mind games. Majors really, REALLY wanted this match. He’s desperate to get his hands on Seromine. And Seromine knows that.
Kelli Starr tries to attack Seromine as he enters the ring, but he avoids her attacks and drives his forearm into her stomach. He then sets her up and drops her with a suplex. As he stands up, Majors is there. He swings at Seromine, but Seromine ducks it and tackles Majors down to the mat. Seromine goes to drop an elbow, but this time it’s Rick Majors that rolls out of the ring.
Seromine stands up, and he’s greeted by a hard throat strike by Kelli Starr.
Ace Anderson: Seromine is fighting a two-front war right now… and losing!
Kelli Starr pounces on Seromine, unloading on him with a series of right and left hands. She then pulls him up and throws him into the corner. Starr charges, but Seromine gets out of the way and she hits the turnbuckle hard. He then grabs her and sets her up for a German suplex, but she breaks free and connects with a reverse Russian leg sweep!
Starr then goes for the cover:
1…
2…
Rick Majors breaks up the pin!
Jerry Andrews: Oohhh… Here we go!
Ace Anderson: Like I said, there will only be one International Champion at the end of this and every competitor in this match wants it to be them.
Starr stands up and glares at Majors. He glares right back.
Seromine takes advantage and he rolls up Starr from behind! Majors rushes towards the pin, but Kelli Starr kicks out before two.
Seromine stands up and he charges at Majors now. Rick Majors ducks. He unleashes a spinning heel kick that Seromine ducks. Seromine grabs him and sets him up, but Majors breaks free. Kelli Starr rushes in and she hits Seromine with a double axehandle to the back. Majors grabs Seromine now, but Seromine pushes him away. As the current International Champion turns around, Kelli Starr connects with a throat strike!
Ace Anderson: Seromine needs to take either Majors or Starr out of this match for at least a while. There’s no way he’ll survive if he’s getting attacked from both sides like this.
Dollface pulls Seromine up and Irish whips him off of the ropes. He drops to the mat and slides under the bottom rope to the outside! Starr runs at the ropes and flies through them, connecting with a suicide dive!
Jerry Andrews: WOAH!
Ace Anderson: Kelli Starr going all out tonight!
Seromine crashes into the guardrail. Starr stands up. She reaches down and pulls him up. He elbows her in the stomach.
Jerry Andrews: Incoming!
Rick Majors comes flying off of the top rope with a diving clothesline! Seromine pulls Kelli Starr in harm’s way, avoiding the shot himself!
Ace Anderson: Smart move by Seromine to see Majors out of the corner of his eye and throw Dollface in front of him!
Majors stands up. Seromine smiles at him mockingly. Majors charge at him and Seromine takes off around the ring. He then slides into the ring on the other side. Majors does the same. Seromine is there to meet him with a stomp.
Jerry Andrews: Seromine knows that he’s in Majors’ head. Majors is possessed right now, but not thinking straight and Seromine is taking advantage.
Seromine pulls Majors up and he backs him into the corner. He takes a moment to mock him and then pulls him out, setting him up for a brainbuster. Majors breaks free and he drops down behind Seromine. He grabs him around the waist from behind, but Seromine breaks free now. Just as he does, he’s hit from behind by Kelli Starr!
Jerry Andrews: Kelli Starr back in this match!
Starr clotheslines Seromine down to the mat. She then pulls him up and grabs him. Majors motions to her to hold Seromine up. She pauses for a moment, but then does just that. Majors runs at Seromine with a jumping spinning wheel kick! Seromine dodges it and Majors kicks Starr right in the face!
Jerry Andrews: Well, if the Starr/Majors alliance wasn’t broken up already, it is now!
Ace Anderson: Told you it would happen.
Majors is visibly frustrated with himself. He pauses for a moment and then turns to face Seromine. Seromine immediately grabs him and throws him out of the ring.
Jerry Andrews: Rick Majors is getting more and more frustrated here tonight and I think it’s that Seromine continues to be one step ahead of him all match. It’s throwing Majors off his game.
Ace Anderson: I’ve heard Majors talk. I know how badly he wants to hurt Seromine and it’s gotta be killing him that Seromine has avoided him nearly all night long. That’s causing him to lose focus, which is bad news for his chances in this match.
Kelli Starr gets to her feet and Seromine attacks her. He unloads with a series of stiff shots, that send her crumbling to the mat. From there, he pulls her up to her feet. She blasts him with a strong palm strike to the jaw that leaves him reeling.
Jerry Andrews: Dollface and Seromine are just brutalizing one another right now!
Starr now with a neck tie clothesline and a cover that gets two. Starr pulls Seromine up and whips him into the corner. He gets his feet up and kicks her right in the face as she charges at him. Kelli Starr is stunned. Seromine follows up with a spinning roundhouse kick. He then pulls Starr up, but she hits a jawbreaker. Kelli Starr now immediately spins around and…
Jerry Andrews: Candygram! The cover!
Ace Anderson: One… two….
Jerry Andrews: Rick Majors breaks up the pin!
Rick Majors pulls up Starr and he knees her in the stomach. He then sets her up and hits a brainbuster. Majors with a cover that gets two. He pulls Dollface up again, but she elbows him in the stomach. She then hits him with an uppercut, gets to her feet, pulls him up and hits a hip toss powerslam! She goes for a cover and gets two.
As Kelli Starr stands up, she’s hit in the chest by Seromine. He then pulls her up and connects with a suplex. He floats over and goes for a quick cover, but Dollface kicks out at two.
Seromine pulls her up and sets her up again, but she breaks free with some stiff shots to the ribs. She takes a step back with Seromine staggered, but she’s hit with a spinning wheel kick by Majors! He goes for another cover and gets two again!
Jerry Andrews: No one can get a real advantage in this match!
Majors pulls Starr up and he throws her into the corner. He charges at her, but she leaps out of the corner with a spear! A cover!
Jerry Andrews: One…. Two…..
Ace Anderson: Seromine breaks up the pin and saves his title!
Seromine pulls Kelli Starr up and Irish whips her across the ring. She hits another spear!
Ace Anderson: One… two… kickout!
Starr stands up, and she’s hit with a roundhouse kick by Rick Majors. He then drives his knee into her face. Majors backs Dollface up into the corner. He then unloads on her with a flurry of roundhouse kicks! Majors now pulls her up and sets her up for the Major Impact! She breaks free! Candygram out of nowhere!
Before Starr can capitalize, Seromine takes her down with a tackle. She flies through the ropes to the outside and hits the floor.
Ace Anderson: Outside of the first few minutes of this match, Seromine is doing a great job keeping either Starr or Majors on the outside so that he doesn’t have to face attacks from both of them at once.
Jerry Andrews: Plus, Starr and Majors certainly seem to have abandoned their plan to team up on him and have turned their attention on one another as well.
Seromine takes a second to compose himself and then turns to face Majors, who has made his way to the corner and is in a bad way.
Seromine waits for Majors to stand up and then runs the ropes, possibly looking for a clothesline. It doesn’t matter as Kelli Starr grabs Seromine’s leg and trips him. She re-enters the ring as Seromine is standing up. She takes him down with a right hand. Majors is pulling himself up in the corner, but Starr stops that by taking his legs out with a chop block. She begins to stomp away on him.
She turns back to Seromine and gets hit with a European uppercut! He then hits her with a snap suplex. Dollface hits the canvas.
Ace Anderson: Kelli Starr wisely rolls out of the ring after getting hit with that suplex.
Majors is pulling himself up again, but Seromine takes advantage and quickly rolls him up for a cover!
Jerry Andrews: One…. Two….
Ace Anderson: Kelli Starr breaks up the pin!
Jerry Andrews: This match is still going!
Ace Anderson: I think Majors may have injured his knee. He seems to be having trouble getting to an upright position.
Jerry Andrews: Doesn’t matter, Seromine and Starr are unloading on one another!
The two competitors are exchanging rights and lefts in the center of the ring.
Jerry Andrews: You can just feel the hatred between these two!
Kelli Starr drops Seromine with a throat strike. She then climbs to the top ropes and waits for Seromine to stand….
Jerry Andrews: Sugar High!
Kelli Starr with a cover!
Jerry Andrews: One…. Two….. kickout!
Ace Anderson: Seromine stays alive!
Kelli Starr stands up, and she’s hit with an elbow smash by Rick Majors. She staggers backwards. He hits her with a running clothesline. Majors now takes a moment to shake his leg, testing it.
Jerry Andrews: You’re right. Rick Majors has clearly injured himself.
He pulls Starr up, but she kicks him in the injured knee and he falls to the mat. She pulls him up and throws him into the corner. Kelli Starr with a big clothesline. She pulls Majors out, but he strikes her in the stomach! He then sets her up…
Jerry Andrews: MAJOR IMPACT!
Majors rolls Kelli Starr over.
Ace Anderson: This could be it! Rick Majors could claim his first title in PCW!
Majors stands up and looks right at Seromine who is just starting to get to his feet. Majors then looks down at Starr. Rick takes a step back and stands in the corner.
Ace Anderson: What is Majors doing?
Seromine smiles as he stands. He pulls Starr up. Short-arm clothesline! And then….
Jerry Andrews: ASHES TO ASHES!
Seromine goes for the cover. Majors remains in the corner, watching the pinfall.
1….
2….
3!!!
The bell rings and Seromine gets to his feet. He spreads his arms in triumph. The referee retrieves the International Title and hands it to him.
Sasha Green: Your winner by pinfall, and STILL International Champioin: Seromine!
Jerry Andrews: Okay… what just happened!?
Majors finally steps out of the corner towards Seromine and he gives him a hug! Seromine smiles, his arms still outstretched as Majors hugs him.
Ace Anderson: WHAT!?
Kelli Starr slowly pulls herself to her feet, using the ropes. Majors notices. He steps away from Seromine and tackles Starr down to the mat! Majors now begins to unload on Starr with a series of punches.
Jerry Andrews: Come on! The match is over!
The assault continues until Seromine places his hand on Majors’ shoulder. Majors stops and rises to his feet. He looks down at the battered Starr and then turns away. He walks across the ring and holds the ropes open for Seromine, who leaves the ring with his championship over his shoulder.
As PCW officials check on Kelli Starr, Seromine walks up the ramp, with Majors following.
Jerry Andrews: Did Rick Majors just align himself with Seromine!?
Ace Anderson: It certainly looks that way.
Jerry Andrews: What the hell is going on here!?
Ace Anderson: All I know is that Seromine is still the PCW International Champion.
Jerry Andrews: SO far tonight, no titles have changed hands. Will Dan Fierce be able to make it a clean sweep?
Ace Anderson: We’re about to find out, Jerry. That match is next!
Main Event
For the World Championship
Cage Match
The only way to win is to escape. No DQ, no countout, no pinfalls or submissions.
Grimm vs “The Fabulous One” Dan Fierce
Referee: Eric Russo
Sasha Green: Ladies and gentlemen it is time for our MAIN EVENT!
The crowd shakes the rafters as ominous music drones lightly, strobe lights flash, and the cage is lowered slowly to the floor. Four ten-foot high walls of chain link descend into place surrounding the ring. Ring techs work to reinforce the structure in place as the announcer continues.
Sasha Green: The following contest is a STEEL CAGE MATCH, and is for the World Heavyweight Championship. There are no pinfalls, submissions, disqualifications or count-outs. The only way to win is to escape!
Introducing first, the challenger. Hailing from Hangtown, Kentucky. Weighing in at 217 pounds... GRIMM!
Lights dim and the PCW-Tron goes black. With the sound of a sharp nib scratching across a ragged sheet of parchment, a sepia-toned cursive scrawls grimm across the screen. The name flickers, wavering in and out of focus with the occasional tracking glitch as if projected from an old forgotten film canister uncovered on the bottom shelf in the cellar. Sparse percussion resonates throughout the arena and is soon joined by a droning, distorted bass line. At that, A Perfect Circle’s ”Counting Bodies Like Sheep to the Rhythm of the War Drums” stomps out of the speakers and marches through the aisles. The drums, the distortion, the voices – all work to herald the arrival of the Hangtown Horror.
Don’t fret, precious, I’m here. Step away from the window.
He walks out to a single blue-white spotlight, stops to bask in the light and shadows, and scans the crowd. The Lord of Misrule closes his eyes and takes a deep breath before making the long walk down the ramp, dead-set on the ring and ignoring the fans along the way. The spotlight follows. The words work their way up through the layers of the song.
Go back to sleep.
Phinehas climbs up onto the apron, enters through the door of the cage, and steps in between the ropes. Hopping up onto a turnbuckle, he casts his gaze out over the crowd with his arms at his side, eyes shifting to take in the sea of faces spread out before him. Grimm then drops down. And waits.
Sasha Green: And hailing from San Francisco, California, weighing in at 225 pounds, he is the World Heavyweight Champion, "The Fabulous One" Dan Fierce!
The synthesized guitar thrumming of Adam Lambert's "Shady" pulse over the speakers. The entire arena is split into six colored sections of
Red
Orange
Yellow
Green
Blue
and Purple
Each section switches colors in order with each pulse of the music. As the lyrics kick in, a group of a half dozen glistening, muscle-bound men of all shapes and colors, dressed in black leather pants, and fuchsia boots dance out from the back, looking like a PCW version of Magic Mike.
Baby, I’m on the hunt
Baby, I got my target on you
Trouble, that’s what I want
And I’m gonna do
Just what I have to
Get your ass down to the front
Go on and roll it out, I dare you
Sorry I’m kinda drunk
But did you just say your game was brand new
They prance and stroll their way down to the ramp, circling the ring, and then, one by one, stopping to line the catwalk from the back to the ring in a staggered pattern. They continue to dance and gyrate in place as the song continues.
No, I ain’t broken, but I need a fix
That satisfaction when I, I get my kicks
I’m up all night, I’m outta sight
Don’t turn on the light
'Cause I’m feeling so shady lately
Come on and take me underground
Deep under the street
Come on and take me, take me down
Where freaks like us can meet
Confetti cannons at each corner of the ring and in front of the entrance explode into life. Out comes Dan Fierce! The audience gets to their feet, cheering wildly as he saunters down the ramp.!
Turn it up, turn it up, turn it up
Turn it way up, don’t stop the beat
Dan Fierce makes his way down to the ring, keeping rhythm to the music whilst taking time to appreciate the fans, and of course, the buff dancers parading him to the ring.
Come on and turn me, turn me out
'Cause I’m feeling so shady lately
Dan smiles broadly at the appreciative audience, blowing kisses and generally returning their love. Dan finally enters the cage, getting the crowd behind him on all sides.
I throw more shade than a cloudy day
The brakes don’t work, I’m just a runaway train
Somebody come and help me out,
All I wanna be is free
I was tryin’ to get down, now I can’t get out
I’m shady lately
He strikes one final pose, holding his hand high, the other on his hip in the center of the ring as the confetti cannons fire one more time, showering the ring with glitter and colorful paper.
Shady lately!
Jerry Andrews: Boy oh boy! This has been a match I've been looking forward to. Talk about some serious history in the works.
Ace Anderson: You ain't kidding! And it all started with a little love tap from Grimm at Trauma 206.
The feed pops up on the ‘tron, approaching a dressing room, bickering voices heard through the open door. As the camera tech peeks the lens just enough to get a good shot, a well-groomed, dark-haired man in blinding fuschia sequins was in a heated debate with Eira! Her back to the camera, Eira carries on the argument.
“I like Urban Decay, I do, but I’m telling you that Kat Von D. has the superior product here!”
“Bitch, please. Do you REALLY think this queen would wear anything less than the best?”
“I’d expect a queen to know their makeup.”
Fierce gasps. “Did you just go there? Did you DARE to say that to ME!?”
Eira raises an eyebrow. “Do I need to repeat myself? Kat Von D.’s Tattoo liner actually stays ON. Or don’t you work that hard in the ring?”
Dan hooks his thumbs in the Pure Class Wrestling World Championship title strapped around his waist. “I obviously know how to WERK that ring, babygirl. It just so happens that the Waterline Eye Pencil stays on better!”
Without warning, a head of bright pink, curly hair pokes itself around the door frame. “Or, you know, it could just be that you have different skin types so different stuff works. But whatever.”
Dollface scampers off just as impulsively as she’d interjected herself into the conversation, Fierce watching her with a fondly bemused stare. The camera backs up, and the reason for the tech giving ground becomes immediately apparent as a figure enters the scene, one weathered hand gripping a shovel! Fierce catches sight first, Eira blocking his full view.
“Grimm. To what do we owe the honor? I doubt you’re here to exchange makeup tips… I do have the perfect color for you though...”
Eira turns around - directly into a savage shovel strike to the face! She goes down like a marionette with its strings cut, collapsing to the floor!
Fierce jumps back with a yell. “What in the glitterfuck are you DOING!?” Dan picks up the nearest object, Eira’s spiked knee brace, and hurls it straight at Grimm’s head.
*KA-PING!*
Grimm goes batter up and blasts the improvised projectile away with an impatient grunt!
Dan’s eyes widen as Grimm advances. “Why are you DOING this!?”
Grimm, steps over Eira’s fallen body to halt a mere shovel swing away.
“Because she’s not ready for you, Fierce.” His eyes lock with Dan’s, fiery versus icy. “She’s not ready for you, and it’s MY turn.”
Grimm swings the shovel, Fierce ducking! Turning and searching frantically, Fierce manages to lay his hands on a random prop, a disembodied mannequin head! A word on the forehead catching his eye, he’s distracted just long enough to -
*WHUD*
Grimm turns on his heel, the two competitors out cold on the floor. He catches sight of the camera tech, the feed suddenly an acid tripper’s nightmare as it bounces around - and down! The camera clatters to the floor, staring blankly at the chipped plaster of the opposite wall. A hand reaches down… a rough hand, weathered with work-cracked nails…
*quiet beep of a camera powering down*
Jerry Andrews: Yeah. I'm not sure what your definition of "love tap" is, Ace, but mine doesn't include gardening tools. Fierce got a little payback at Trauma 207 as the Special Guest Referee during the Whitey Ford and Grimm match. Watch what happens.
Ford shakes Grimm off at the last second, but the Lord of Misrule doesn't give a moment's respite, rushing in and driving a shoulder deep into Whitey's gut. Grimm crosses the ring for more of a running start. He charges like a bull, intending to catch Ford in the ribs with another spear, but Whitey sunset flips over for another pin attempt. When the count doesn't come from the still-disoriented Fierce, Whitey gets up in the ref's face.
Dan Fierce mouths the word "duck," Whitey obeying instinctively as Grimm sneaks up from behind. GLITTER! GRIMM JUST CAUGHT A FISTFUL OF GLITTER TO THE EYES! A confused Ford nevertheless takes advantage of the blinded contender, setting him up for a back-toss piledriver!
...1!
…...2!!
……….
………...3!!!
Your winner: Whitey Ford via Pinfall
Jerry Andrews: That's it! Whitey gets the three!
Ace Anderson: Is... Is it against the rules if the ref cheats?
Jerry Andrews: I have no idea. It's just weird for me that Whitey isn't the one who cheated to win.
Ace Anderson: I smell a conspiracy.
Jerry Andrews: It could be the Taco Bell you had for lunch.
Fierce asks for a microphone after he raises Ford's hand in victory. He stands over the fallen Dillinger, who still clutches at his eyes desperately. Whitey heads up the ramp, his hands held high, stopping halfway to watch the aftermath.
“You didn't honestly think I'd let your little love tap slide unanswered, did you, Grimmy-poo? Maybe the next time you decide to fuck with a cat, you'll make sure she doesn't have claws. I can keep this clean, or I can scrap with the best of them. If you want this to get ugly, this bitch can oblige, and don't you ever forget that.”
Fierce drops the mic directly on Grimm's chest as he exits the ring. The fans cheer, along with a few mixed jeers for his actions. He walks past a gob smacked Whitey, waggling his fingers seductively.
Dan Fierce mouths the word "duck," Whitey obeying instinctively as Grimm sneaks up from behind. GLITTER! GRIMM JUST CAUGHT A FISTFUL OF GLITTER TO THE EYES! A confused Ford nevertheless takes advantage of the blinded contender, setting him up for a back-toss piledriver!
...1!
…...2!!
……….
………...3!!!
Your winner: Whitey Ford via Pinfall
Jerry Andrews: That's it! Whitey gets the three!
Ace Anderson: Is... Is it against the rules if the ref cheats?
Jerry Andrews: I have no idea. It's just weird for me that Whitey isn't the one who cheated to win.
Ace Anderson: I smell a conspiracy.
Jerry Andrews: It could be the Taco Bell you had for lunch.
Fierce asks for a microphone after he raises Ford's hand in victory. He stands over the fallen Dillinger, who still clutches at his eyes desperately. Whitey heads up the ramp, his hands held high, stopping halfway to watch the aftermath.
“You didn't honestly think I'd let your little love tap slide unanswered, did you, Grimmy-poo? Maybe the next time you decide to fuck with a cat, you'll make sure she doesn't have claws. I can keep this clean, or I can scrap with the best of them. If you want this to get ugly, this bitch can oblige, and don't you ever forget that.”
Fierce drops the mic directly on Grimm's chest as he exits the ring. The fans cheer, along with a few mixed jeers for his actions. He walks past a gob smacked Whitey, waggling his fingers seductively.
Ace Anderson: I still don't know how Dan Fierce got away with that under while being an official. At Trauma 208, Dan Fierce had just barely won a grueling battle against Grimm when our PCW President, "Showtime" Michael Wryght shows up to set the scene for this very battle.
Both men get the same idea, running the ropes, and meeting in the middle with a double clothesline. Once again, both men are down. Lane begins the count.
1!
2!
3!
4!
Both men show some slight signs of life.
5!
6!
Fierce rolls over to all fours as Grimm shakily rises to a seated position.
7!
Fierce gets all the way up on wobbly legs. He hastens over to kick Grimm on the back of the head, but they have very little steam left in them. Dan rebounds from the ropes, dropping a knee on the back of Grimm's head before collecting him from the mat and leading him to the corner. He starts to set up for a Makeover, but the cunning countryman scampers out of the corner. Fierce turns, ducking just in time to avoid a hamfisted right cross. A kick to the gut and a twist of bodies...
Jerry Andrews: MAKEOVER!
Ace Anderson: There it is! He got the three count! Holy cow, what a match!
Fierce barely has time to have his hand raised after a grueling match before Grimm is back to his feet behind the World Champion. The crowd screams a warning, but it's too late. Grimm kicks Fierce in the gut, doubling him over. He puts Dan in a headlock and leads him to a corner for added leverage.
Jerry Andrews: The Harvest! Grimm just hit Fierce with the Harvest!
Grimm spits on his opponent as he exits the ring. Fierce springs to his feet, grabbing a fistful of ginger beard over the top rope and drags Grimm back into the ring. The two begin trading fists back and forth. Lane tries to insert himself to gain some semblance of order, but both men shove him head over heels across the ring. He motions for more security as Grimm and Fierce continue trying to dismantle each other. Refs and black shirted bouncers alike stream out from back, invading the ring to pry the competitors apart with varying degrees of temporary success.
"Gold of the Ceiling," by the Black Keys brings the riot down to a controlled (slightly) ruckus as "Mr. Showtime" Michael Wryght pops out from back to a flurry of fanfare. Ace Anderson stands at full attention, complete with a military-style salute. He motions for Jerry to join him. Jerry stands, but doesn't salute.
Ace Anderson: Come on! Show our President some love.
Jerry Andrews: He's #notmyPCWpresident.
Wryght holds up a hand to calm the crowd as he pulls out a mic.
”I can tell that there's bad blood brewing between you and Grim, Dan Fierce. You two have fought each other and ripped each other apart all month long, and all it's achieved is making you two hate each other. You're both acting like... Well... Like animals.”
The crowd roars in agreement.
”I mean, if you two keep it up, we may have to put you in confinement.”
Now both Fierce and Grimm are paying close attention to what Wryght is saying.
In fact, I'd say that's a very good idea. I'm going to sign an Executive Order for Mass Destruction. The main event for the pay-per-view will not only be for the World Title, it will be held in a steel cage!
The peanut gallery shakes the rafters with cheers.
”I think the Faithful like that idea. I'll make it happen.”
Wryght begins to leave but immediately turns back around to speak again.
”Oh. By the way... Since you two want to put each other in the hospital so badly, the only way to win is to escape. No DQ. No count-out. No pinfalls. No submissions. Just get out of the cage. With both feet. See you both at Mass Destruction.”
1!
2!
3!
4!
Both men show some slight signs of life.
5!
6!
Fierce rolls over to all fours as Grimm shakily rises to a seated position.
7!
Fierce gets all the way up on wobbly legs. He hastens over to kick Grimm on the back of the head, but they have very little steam left in them. Dan rebounds from the ropes, dropping a knee on the back of Grimm's head before collecting him from the mat and leading him to the corner. He starts to set up for a Makeover, but the cunning countryman scampers out of the corner. Fierce turns, ducking just in time to avoid a hamfisted right cross. A kick to the gut and a twist of bodies...
Jerry Andrews: MAKEOVER!
Ace Anderson: There it is! He got the three count! Holy cow, what a match!
Your winner: "The Fabulous One" Dan Fierce!
Fierce barely has time to have his hand raised after a grueling match before Grimm is back to his feet behind the World Champion. The crowd screams a warning, but it's too late. Grimm kicks Fierce in the gut, doubling him over. He puts Dan in a headlock and leads him to a corner for added leverage.
Jerry Andrews: The Harvest! Grimm just hit Fierce with the Harvest!
Grimm spits on his opponent as he exits the ring. Fierce springs to his feet, grabbing a fistful of ginger beard over the top rope and drags Grimm back into the ring. The two begin trading fists back and forth. Lane tries to insert himself to gain some semblance of order, but both men shove him head over heels across the ring. He motions for more security as Grimm and Fierce continue trying to dismantle each other. Refs and black shirted bouncers alike stream out from back, invading the ring to pry the competitors apart with varying degrees of temporary success.
"Gold of the Ceiling," by the Black Keys brings the riot down to a controlled (slightly) ruckus as "Mr. Showtime" Michael Wryght pops out from back to a flurry of fanfare. Ace Anderson stands at full attention, complete with a military-style salute. He motions for Jerry to join him. Jerry stands, but doesn't salute.
Ace Anderson: Come on! Show our President some love.
Jerry Andrews: He's #notmyPCWpresident.
Wryght holds up a hand to calm the crowd as he pulls out a mic.
”I can tell that there's bad blood brewing between you and Grim, Dan Fierce. You two have fought each other and ripped each other apart all month long, and all it's achieved is making you two hate each other. You're both acting like... Well... Like animals.”
The crowd roars in agreement.
”I mean, if you two keep it up, we may have to put you in confinement.”
Now both Fierce and Grimm are paying close attention to what Wryght is saying.
In fact, I'd say that's a very good idea. I'm going to sign an Executive Order for Mass Destruction. The main event for the pay-per-view will not only be for the World Title, it will be held in a steel cage!
The peanut gallery shakes the rafters with cheers.
”I think the Faithful like that idea. I'll make it happen.”
Wryght begins to leave but immediately turns back around to speak again.
”Oh. By the way... Since you two want to put each other in the hospital so badly, the only way to win is to escape. No DQ. No count-out. No pinfalls. No submissions. Just get out of the cage. With both feet. See you both at Mass Destruction.”
Jerry Andrews: So there you have it; the brief, but brutal history between Grimm and "The Fabulous One."
Ace Anderson: Looks like Russo is ready to get things started.
The ref calls for the bell as Grimm and Fierce circle each other. Both men tie up, but Grimm is quick to bury a knee to Firece's gut, followed quickly by another, and another, driving Dan to the corner in the process. The Hangtown Horror Irish whips Fierce across the ring, but the Fabulous One reverses it. Fierce follows in closely with a missile drop kick.
Grimm collapses, clutching his chest as Fierce pops to his feet. The Fabulous One unloads with a series of kicks across the chest, capped off with an enziguri that acquaints Grimm with the mat. Grimm flips over onto his back while Fierce bounds off of the second rope, back flipping in a lionsault. Grimm scouts the move, getting his knees up in time to greet the incoming threat. Dan holds his aching ribcage, giving Grimm all the respite he needs to stand. Grimm grasps his opponent, pulling him up and planting him right back down with a Foddershock.
The Lord of Misrule gathers his quarry, pulling Fierce to his feet and rushing him face first into the chain link cage wall. Fierce stumbles back into a gut wrench back breaker. Unrelenting, Grimm stomps the World Champion about the neck and shoulders prior to a devastating freefalling headbutt. Grimm leaps to his feet, eyeballing the cage door.
Jerry Andrews: Uh oh! It looks like Grimm may be thinking of an early escape.
Ace Anderson: You have a brain made for radio, you know that?
Sure enough, Grimm calls for the door to be opened as he makes his way. He ducks between the second and third ropes, but Fierce has rallied upright and caught the Hangtown Horror before he could find freedom. Grimm turns awkwardly to face his foe, attempting back elbows, but Fierce answers with those educated feet, wearing the challenger down enough to grab the cage door and slam it in Dillinger's face. Hard. That leaves him draped over the second turnbuckle. Fierce grins widely, the mischievous wheels spinning in the devious diva's mind.
Fierce grabs both of Grimm's legs and pulls his body out to where only his head and shoulders are on the corner. Fierce rears back and...
Ace Anderson: HOLY *censored*!!! He just kicked Grimm in the mommy-daddy button!
Jerry Andrews: It's perfectly legal in this match. Unsettling to watch, but legal.
Grimm wilts to the corner as Fierce gets a running start for a bronco buster. Fierce latches onto a fistful of ginger beard, snapmaring the Hangtown Horror to the center of the ring. The Fabulous One rebounds off of the ropes, connecting with a shining wizard to the back of Grimm's head. Fierce drops to one knee, clasping his nemesis in a chin lock to wear the fight out of him.
Phinehas shifts this way and that to loosen Dan's grip, but the glitter loving glamazon keeps his grip until the Lord of Misrule struggles to his feet, bringing Fierce with him and then back to the mat with a back drop. Grimm gains his vertical base, pulling his enemy with him and throwing him at the ropes. Grimm gifts his glamorous foe a Samoan drop on the bounce. The Elder Dillinger pulls his opponent up, dropping him back down with a Lament Configuration.
With Fierce groggy, Grimm rushes to the corner, scaling the cage, looking for another escape attempt. He makes it to the top turnbuckle before a revitalized Fierce leaps from the mat to the top alongside Grimm, assailing him with a flurry of punches. Grimm responds in kind with fists of his own, accentuated with one final headbutt that reintroduces the Fabulous One to the effects of gravity. He starts to resume his flight before having second thoughts after seeing the prone Fierce. The Lord of Misrule take to a flight of a different kind with a leaping headbutt...
...That misses! Fierce barely manages to roll out of the path. Grimm and Fierce both wobble to their feet. They trade more blows, but Fierce blocks his opponent's last one, whipping him to the ropes and following right behind with a dropkick that drives Grimm against the fence. Grimm falls to the mat, rolling under the ropes and against the cage wall. Fierce gets a head of steam, doing a baseball slide into Grimm's breadbasket.
Snagging a handful of crimson locks, Fierce pulls Grimm to his feet, threading him through the inside of the second rope and the cage side of the top one. Fierce pulls back like an archer aiming his bow, and releases, giving Grimm the chance to get facially intimate with the chain link.
Jerry Andrews: I think Grimm is busted open!
Sure enough, a trickle of essence begins to drip down from the Lord of Misrule's forehead. Fierce drums his foe with a few well placed boots to the noggin before he decides to make his own attempt at leaving this mess behind. Fierce gets to the top of the cage when suddenly...
"Bad Man," by Bobaflex shatters the airwaves. Dan looks confused as Whitey Ford strolls with a purpose down the runway, mouthing some choice words for the reigning World Champion. By the time he reaches the cage, both he and Fierce are having quite the verbal exchange. Before he realizes it, Whitey scales the chain link, clasping Fierce by the face and shoving him unceremoniously back into the ring. Ford peers under the ring, producing a chair and ordering the door to be opened. He begins to make his way into the ring when the zebra blocks him. Ford continues to scream at the ref, pointing an accusatory finger at both Fierce and Grimm. He draws the chair back in a threatening fashion to the official. Despite it being a no DQ match, Russo takes exception to the interference and threats, banishing Whitey back to the locker room. Ford slams the chair down in frustration, but circles the ring, grabbing weapons of all sorts and tossing them into the ring before security finally rushes down to escort the fuming Ford away. Whitey gets in one final ominous prediction as the crowd jeers his forced exit; "I HOPE YOU KILL EACH OTHER!"
Ace Anderson: Wow. Just Wow. Who would have thought we would have seen Whitey come out and do that?
Jerry Andrews slowly raises his hand. Ace blinks at him.
Ace Anderson: Shut up. Ford's been on the up-and-up since his return and you know it.
The ring, littered with chairs, a sledge hammer, a small step ladder, a metal trash can and lid, a purse, and of course, a shovel, now looks like a tornado upchucked in the middle of the match. The physically drained competitors begin to stir from their unscheduled break, eyeballing the debris in the ring with no clue how it got there.
Russo attempts to clear the middle of the ring as Grimm and Fierce stagger to their feet. Fierce snags the closest implement to him; the sledge. He scans the device with bewilderment, as if he's never seen one in his life. He gets a look on his face that would give Mommy Dearest herself cause to pause. Then he licks the sledge seductively as he reaches into his tights to add a bit of glittery sparkle to the tool.
Grimm likewise spies a chair, arming himself with that briefly just before his eyes lock onto his favorite weapon. He drops the chair, trading it for the official Dillinger shovel. He spins it in his hand, feeling the weight. Satisfied with his choice, he hefts it high above his head and charges. He brings it down, whiffing it just past the dodgy Fierce, who retaliates by driving the head of the hammer deep into Grimm's ribs.
Fierce drives the business end of the tool home again, causing Grimm to lose his weapon. Dan slings Grimm across the ring, rushing at him to clothesline him with the sledge, but the wily woodsman ducks, connecting with a Lament Configuration with the sledge handle across Fierce's neck.
HO-LY SHIT! HO-LY SHIT! HO-LY SHIT!
As the crowd voices it approval of the action, Grimm, his face rapidly becoming a half mask of crimson, gathers a chair, ramming it down into his opponent's chest mercilessly. Grimm uses the chair to work on the neck of the prone Fabulous One, placing the chair around Fierce's neck and stomping for good measure. Dan lay on the mat, nearly unmoving as the Hangtown Horror scales the turnbuckles. He eyeballs the top of the cage and then his susceptible opponent.
Jerry Andrews: What does Grimm have planned here? Is he trying to escape or what?
Ace Anderson: I don't... Know. He wouldn't...
Without pretense, Grimm spins on the turnbuckle and leaps! Fierce manages to barely escape the impact, the chair still tenuously around his neck. He stirs while Grimm grasps his aching ribs from the missed attempt at a splash. The Fabulous One gets on a knee, removing the chair and looking at it with a vengeful glare. He staggers to standing, rearing back with the implement and returning the loving steel caresses Grimm so generously gave him just a few minutes earlier. Satisfied that his foe isn't getting up real soon, Fierce calls for the door to be opened.
Just as he sticks his torso between the ropes, Grimm grabs hold of his ankle and begins gnawing on the calf just above the boot. Fierce screams in agony, turning and kicking at his rabid nemesis. "BITCH!" shouts Fierce, climbing back into the ring after finally physically "convincing" Grimm to release his leg. He rushes over, snatching the purse and returns, beating Grimm none-too-lightly about the head and shoulders with the item before dumping a couple of now disintegrated bricks out from within. He bends down to pull Grimm to his feet, but he's greeted by a black mist to the eyes!
Fierce yowls in shock, stumbling around the ring and taking wild, blind swings at air. Grimm spits in Fierce's direction, crawling over to the door with impunity. He starts to crawl through when a commotion next to the timekeeper's table gets the crowd's attention. A man with shoulder length hair and a mustache jumps over the barricade, grabbing the bell and charging the escaping Grimm.
Ace Anderson: Isn’t that Bob King, the guy we saw earlier with Whitey Ford?
Jerry Andrews: I believe it is! And he just lambasted Grimm with the bell!
King shoves Grimm most of the way back into the ring before letting the door do the rest of dirty work. Security quickly rushes the ring, overcoming the relatively unknown man as he shouts, "Whitey sends his regards." It takes several men, but they manage to direct King to the back and away from the action. The fans give a mixture of responses to the newcomer as he's being given the bum's rush.
Meanwhile, in the ring, Fierce drags Grimm to the center of the ring, dropping a few elbows on the back of his already ringing noggin. The Fabulous One hits the ropes, but before he can react, Grimm pops up like a Jack-in-the-box hitting a Foddershock that hangs Fierce on the second rope. Grimm, nearly running blind thanks to his own blood trickling into his eyes, yanks Fierce from the ropes, shoving his face into the fence several times, finally getting a stroke of blood payment from his opponent.
Grimm recovers his shovel as Fierce is draped over the top turnbuckle, hoping to recover. With a mighty swing, the Lord of Misrule pastes the flamboyant champion with a thunderous slap of metal to skin. Fierce sucks in air as he wilts to the mat. Grimm follows his prey, delivering another horrendous blow with the garden utensil. One final swing welts Fierce's back hard enough to snap the handle. Grimm discards the weapon actually stepping on Dan as he scales the cage to attempt to escape.
An aching World Champion struggles to his feet to stop his foe from exiting. Fierce manages to painfully gain a grip on the Hangtown Horror's tights, using all of his weight to pull and yank, Grimm fighting every bit of the way. At last, Fierce manages to unceremoniously dump Dillinger back into the center of the ring. Both men lay in the ring, exhausted from their battle.
Jerry Andrews: Both champ and challenger are down!
Ace Anderson: But there's no count! This can only be won when one of them gets out of there.
Nearly half a minute passes before either man stirs, but Fierce is first. He crawls over to the purse and begins to rifle around in one of the pockets, producing a rubber band. Grimm starts to slowly work his way to the cage door once more. In desperation, Fierce leaps onto Grimm, smashing his foe's face against the chain link. Reaching through the fence, Dan deftly uses the rubber band to tie Grimm's beard to the fence! Convinced that his enemy isn't going anywhere, Fierce slowly ascends the turnbuckles.
Grimm spins his body, panicked by the ensnarement, aiming his feet at the door. He calls for the door to open, but he can barely get a half leg out. Grimm tries to reach the floor as Fierce manages to get to the outside of the cage. Grimm's eyes grow wide as he lets out a blood curdling scream. He yanks once, twice... Fierce leaps down from the halfway point...
Russo calls for the bell!
DING DING DING!
Jerry Andrews: What just happened? Who won?
Ace Anderson: I'm not sure Jerry.
Sasha Green: "Ladies and gentlemen, your winner... and NEW World Champion... GRIMM!"
The camera pans in on Grimm as he's handed the belt, blood dripping from the place where parts of his beard used to be. The camera zooms in on the cage, ginger curls still hanging like a demented ribbon. The Faithful let out a collective gasp while Grimm stands on unstable knees, holding his reclaimed gold aloft. Fierce lays out on the runway, completely spent, and totally disheartened by the decision.
Jerry Andrews: Holy cow! What a match!
Ace Anderson: Did... Grimm just sacrifice part of his beard?
Jerry Andrews: He did, indeed, Ace. How many people do you know who will do that in order to win?
Ace Anderson: I'm in shock. And awe. What a way to end a pay-per-view. A well deserved win and the 6th time Grimm has held the PCW World Heavyweight Championship!
Jerry Andrews: There's a reason he's one of most feared legends within the PCW halls. This just proves that he is as good as he says he is.
Ace Anderson: No doubt! Man! What a show! This is one for the record books.
Jerry Andrews: It certainly was, Ace. That does it for Mass Destruction Seven! But the action isn't going to stop just because this one's over.
Ace Anderson: You must be referring to the Icemann Invitational Tournament, that's set to start with Trauma 209 and culminating at the next PPV; Living a Legacy Nine!
Jerry Andrews: That's right, Ace. Be sure to tune into our regular Traumas to cheer for your favorites! So, on behalf of all of PCW management and staff, I'm Jerry Andrews...
Ace Anderson: ...And I'm Ace Anderson. Have a wonderful night!
*click*