The one where Grimm sees a man about a mule
Dec 9, 2015 9:54:56 GMT -5
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Post by Grimm on Dec 9, 2015 9:54:56 GMT -5
The farmer looks at the stern, slender red-headed man standing across from him, then nods towards the pasture.
“Yep, I’d say Gertrude is the one for you. She’s a hard worker and ain’t near as stubborn as most. What did you say you needed her for?”
“I didn’t.”
“Fair enough. Now, truth be told I’ve never rented out a mule before, but I reckon, what, $25 a day sound fair enough for you?”
Phinehas Dillinger reaches behind him, produces a weathered black leather wallet, and digs inside for a 20 and a 5. He hands it to the farmer and then opens the gate himself.
“I suppose so, but this won’t take long.”
The farmer starts to put the bills into the front pocket of his overalls but pauses.
“Wait, what…?”
Phinehas deftly steps around mule patties as he walks to Gertrude. He stands in front of the shaggy beast and tilts his head. Gertrude glances up as she chews a mouthful of grass, and continues to chew away as Phinehas speaks.
“You see this rented mule, Billy?”
The farmer steps through the open gate and walks towards the pair.
“Who are you talking to? Who’s Billy?”
“Well, this is going to be you at the PPV.” And Phinehas proceeds to headbutt Gertrude right square in the face. The mule staggers back, as does the bearded assailant.
“Now hold on just a minute, you didn’t say anything about beating a rented mule. The deal’s off!”
Phinehas gathers himself, then unleashes a spinning backhand fist to the side of Gertrude’s head. Again, the mule staggers a few steps but remains on her feet. The farmer breaks into a run and comes to a stop between them.
“That’s enough! Take your money back and get out of here!”
The farmer reaches into his pocket and throws the wadded bills at Phinehas. He strokes Gertrude’s nose as he whispers sweet nothings into her enormous ears. Meanwhile, Phinehas picks the money off the ground. He walks away and can be heard saying, “Whew, that was a good one,” as he smooths out the bills.
“Yep, I’d say Gertrude is the one for you. She’s a hard worker and ain’t near as stubborn as most. What did you say you needed her for?”
“I didn’t.”
“Fair enough. Now, truth be told I’ve never rented out a mule before, but I reckon, what, $25 a day sound fair enough for you?”
Phinehas Dillinger reaches behind him, produces a weathered black leather wallet, and digs inside for a 20 and a 5. He hands it to the farmer and then opens the gate himself.
“I suppose so, but this won’t take long.”
The farmer starts to put the bills into the front pocket of his overalls but pauses.
“Wait, what…?”
Phinehas deftly steps around mule patties as he walks to Gertrude. He stands in front of the shaggy beast and tilts his head. Gertrude glances up as she chews a mouthful of grass, and continues to chew away as Phinehas speaks.
“You see this rented mule, Billy?”
The farmer steps through the open gate and walks towards the pair.
“Who are you talking to? Who’s Billy?”
“Well, this is going to be you at the PPV.” And Phinehas proceeds to headbutt Gertrude right square in the face. The mule staggers back, as does the bearded assailant.
“Now hold on just a minute, you didn’t say anything about beating a rented mule. The deal’s off!”
Phinehas gathers himself, then unleashes a spinning backhand fist to the side of Gertrude’s head. Again, the mule staggers a few steps but remains on her feet. The farmer breaks into a run and comes to a stop between them.
“That’s enough! Take your money back and get out of here!”
The farmer reaches into his pocket and throws the wadded bills at Phinehas. He strokes Gertrude’s nose as he whispers sweet nothings into her enormous ears. Meanwhile, Phinehas picks the money off the ground. He walks away and can be heard saying, “Whew, that was a good one,” as he smooths out the bills.
