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Post by Grimm on Sept 18, 2015 12:27:51 GMT -5
Laying Claim: I can't speak to the content just yet, but personally I find that purple font difficult to read.
ALSO...
Bubble Pop: What is a "Hardstyle competition"?
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Post by Justin Kaard on Sept 18, 2015 20:38:47 GMT -5
Laying Claim:Bubble Pop: What is a "Hardstyle competition"? Youtube says it's this |
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Post by Grimm on Sept 18, 2015 20:47:43 GMT -5
1. Ah, so it's not like any dance competition I've ever seen.
2. Look at the pants on that kid.
3. I'll leave legitimate feedback in a few days.
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Post by Eira on Sept 18, 2015 20:49:39 GMT -5
Bubble Pop: What is a "Hardstyle competition"? What Tom said. xD |
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Post by Grimm on Sept 18, 2015 20:52:53 GMT -5
Bubble Pop: What is a "Hardstyle competition"? What Tom said. xD His turnout is atrocious, and he moves his arms entirely too much. |
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Judge
PCW Talent
I am the hard lesson...
Posts: 144 
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Post by Judge on Sept 18, 2015 21:55:16 GMT -5
So I have been dancing this for years now
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Post by Eira on Sept 18, 2015 22:01:05 GMT -5
More diverse example:
Shuffling -
Jumpstyle -
A "hardstyle" competition will usually blend the two dance styles into the same competition, often with different brackets for different styles, solo & group, etc.
Jumpstyle is like Nate's dancing on E and electronic music.
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Judge
PCW Talent
I am the hard lesson...
Posts: 144
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Post by Judge on Sept 18, 2015 22:03:23 GMT -5
I really have been dancing!! Also feedback coming
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Post by Sadistic on Sept 20, 2015 9:55:01 GMT -5
19 total RPs.
15 posted on the last day.
You pieces of crap!
Joking, joking.
I'm only disappointed with Tom for his sandbaggery.
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Post by Sadistic on Sept 20, 2015 10:27:52 GMT -5
"Full Circle"
by The Anarchist
Starting off with a journal entry is a nice way to tie in your PCW relevance, which you did well. I must praise you, not only in this piece, but your other RPs as well, for really selling your opponents and your current storyline. While some fall into the trap of promoting themselves, you're able to put yourself over, as well as your angle and your opponents. Great stuff and an excellent tool for propelling your story forward.
The sexual tension between Jason and Destiny is so thick you could cut it with a knife, as always. You push the envelope just enough without venturing into x-rated territory, and the children are always there for some sort of comedic interruption. The playfulness between Jason and Destiny, with Jason turning the tables on her and then being chased around the house, was great. There was a realness to it that I think most of us can relate to. And Autumn's little quips crack me up.
Then, we get some history and backstory on the Anarchist and how he and his wife met all those years ago. I will admit that I wasn't sure what in the hell Destiny was doing when she started cutting on their hands. But then all was explained, and a chapter was closed on their lives. Destiny's pregnancy joke was...wow, that was messed up. That's a pretty serious thing to use as a petty joke, and Jason took it a lot better than I would have.
All around good RP, man. You pretty much touched on everything. You opponents, your feud and the current state of PCW, a heaping helping of character development and backstory. Another impressive offering from the Anarchist.
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Post by Sadistic on Sept 20, 2015 10:43:17 GMT -5
"Judge and Jury's Executioner"
by Alexa Black
Your storytelling is getting better with each RP, Simon. In this RP, I feel like Alexa's character became three dimensional with the inclusion of Lunatic and her warm spot for him. This was an awesome touch and showed Miss Black to be more than a maniacal monster. I don't know if I'd go so far as to say that she has a heart, seeing as how she was almost viewing Lunatic as a possession rather than some sort of mutual relationship, but it was cool character development nonetheless. The RP seemed a tad on the short side, but I understand that you were feeling under the weather for most of the cycle. I just wanted to read more is all. The Chinese Algebra line was pretty clever. Only part I would change is when she looked into the camera at the end. It went from a good story to a PCW promo at the very end. I'd just do away with the whole camera idea completely and tell the whole RP as a story rather than something a camera crew happened upon, if that makes sense. A good overall RP, though. And the "Hear Us...Fear Us" tag line at the end was just awesome. I really think that could be a good catchphrase. It's got a nice, ominous ring to it. Good stuff.
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Post by Sadistic on Sept 20, 2015 10:45:47 GMT -5
"Nothing"
by Stormm
Oh...wait...
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Post by Sadistic on Sept 20, 2015 11:21:55 GMT -5
"Isaiah 14:12"
by Eira
Powerful. That's the word that comes to mind after reading this. Alternating between Eira's post-in-progress and her interaction with Murdoc proved to be an excellent medium to power this piece. The emergence of Murdoc's soft side conveyed just how serious Eira's injuries are, seeing as he's one of the most merciless men in PCW history. It was also a great sell job of the cathedral match and really helped highlight just how brutal the fight was. Your PCW relevance was very heavy, which I'm a fan of, but you also were able to pepper in enough character development to allow the RP to hit on all of the major grading columns. Only thing I really noticed were a couple of uncharacteristic typos. Other than that, this was top notch stuff.
Onto the aforementioned "powerful" bits. Eira refuses to let go of her of her animosity towards Gem. Once you see the facts lined out on paper, it's easy to see why. I didn't even realize it until you spelled it out. Over the course of our quite lengthy feud, the last Trauma was our ONLY one-on-one match. That's a bit odd, considering we've been going at it for well over a year now. And how many times has Gem had a one-on-one shot against Sadistic. This show makes it four. FOUR! Whether this frustration is IC or OOC, it is very justifiable, in my opinion. I feel like this piece may have been powered by some real emotion, and those RPs tend to be the best.
This RP was all-around well-written and did a swell job of putting over your opponents and your storyline. Another great read.
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Post by Loki on Sept 20, 2015 22:14:38 GMT -5
I'm only disappointed with Tom for his sandbaggery. I hope you die of dysentery. |
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Post by Sadistic on Sept 20, 2015 22:51:32 GMT -5
I'm only disappointed with Tom for his sandbaggery. I hope you die of dysentery. You know I take that as a sign of affection... |
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Post by Eira on Sept 21, 2015 4:20:07 GMT -5
I hope you die of dysentery. You know I take that as a sign of affection... You and your blushing bride must have a wilder relationship than I thought. |
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Post by Loki on Sept 21, 2015 8:19:43 GMT -5
You know I take that as a sign of affection... You and your blushing bride must have a wilder relationship than I thought. He's the scat man. And not in a catchy musical kind of way. More like a 2 girls 1 cup kind of way. He likes poop. |
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Post by Sadistic on Sept 21, 2015 12:41:12 GMT -5
You and your blushing bride must have a wilder relationship than I thought. He's the scat man. And not in a catchy musical kind of way. More like a 2 girls 1 cup kind of way. He likes poop. Jesus, Tom. Don't you have some feedback you'd like to leave? |
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Post by Loki on Sept 21, 2015 14:10:21 GMT -5
He's the scat man. And not in a catchy musical kind of way. More like a 2 girls 1 cup kind of way. He likes poop. Jesus, Tom. Don't you have some feedback you'd like to leave? Yes, yes I do. |
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Post by Grimm on Sept 22, 2015 12:26:59 GMT -5
This feedback isn’t as thorough as I’ve given in the past, and it’s obviously not as detailed as Josh, but I’ve come to the realization that I say a lot of the same things over and over in this thread so I’m just hitting the high points this time.
Missing in Action
I like the payphone reference. It’s fortunate Wasp could even find one…and yet very unfortunate that High Tide is dragging him into his current ‘situation’. Good job of showing that no matter how frustrated he is with his partner’s antics, deep down Wasp is concerned about High Tide.
The Money Man
Although vague, there was quite a bit of good story progression here (which I clearly need to catch up on). There was also not-very-much match relevance, so we’ll see how that balances out.
Goodbye Hello
Now that’s a nice return RP right there. A little history with some catching-up without just vomiting it all over us, and I really liked that nifty in-the-moment bit from Trauma. Good work, Tom.
Lunatic’s Revelation
Well, you made it clear you weren’t happy with it…but at least you got something up, and if nothing else Lunatic was as goofy as ever.
Nero Shall Fiddle Again - Chapter 8
It’s interesting (in a good way!) how you portray beings like Chaos and Fate almost as mortals in regards to their interactions with other characters.
And I have a feeling after this letter Saniti is going to get to the bottom of everything…or at least he’d better, for his and Kelli’s sakes.
Bubble Pop
I’ve always liked this character, and I can tell you like writing for her because of posts like this. There have been times you’ve mentioned looming deadlines and sandbagging penalties and whatnot, but whatever (and whenever) you post for Dollface has always kept the character very consistent. And once again you manage to integrate PCW goings-on into what sometimes reads like her pill-addled ramblings (in a good way!)about whatever else she has going on, and it all fits.
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