Trauma 206 Results!

[Eira]

Thursday February 2nd, 2017

The camera pans out over the wild crowd, signs here and there catching the tech’s attention. A five-alarm peroxide blonde that could have been Lyle Lovett’s identical twin sister is waving a lurid pink sign: "Amish, Assholes and Magicians: #PCW?". Proudly standing with her brother, a girl of about ten holds a message on red poster board, "I'll Never Watch Disney Movies the same; Thanks, Seromine". Well known drag queen Rosemary Rain sits with her obedient Leather boys, eyebrows on fleek as she lounges below a draping banner: "Youtube this S%*& - Eira and Dan Fierce Makeup Tutorials!". Meanwhile, a pack of fratboys are all helping hold up a sign wistful for the days of yore: "What Happened to the Ninja Turtles?! BRING BACK LEONARDO!"




Jerry Andrews: Good EVENING ladies and gentlemen - and WELCOME to Trauma!

Ace Anderson: We’ve got a great show lined up for you folks, all the action and legally ambiguous shenanigans you could ask for!

Jerry Andrews: Not only that, but we have the debut of new talent Olivia Xavier! Something of a mystery, this newcomer has the rumor mill buzzing. One talent even implied she -

Ace Anderson: Hold that thought, Jerry, the camera techs have found something interesting!

*Scene switches backstage to show the lithe form of a new face to the PCW faithful, Olivia Xavier, backstage in a small, secluded area, mainly used for sound equipment storage. She has a game face on, and looks supremely focused as she gets a few cool down stretches in. Behind her, keeping his distance, is a taller figure, one a little more familiar as he's had some impressive showings over the past few weeks. He, himself is readying for a match tonight. Kyle Shane walks behind Olivia, giving her an appraising look up and down as he gets near.*

Kyle Shane: Hmmm, you know, I can see your muscles are all knotted up like that, I can suggest you a few exercises to work the kinks out.

*Olivia, taken off guard by someone slipping up behind her, instantly whirls around and glares daggers at him, her tone displeased.*

Olivia Xavier: I don't like people sneaking up on me.

*Kyle holds his hands up in an understood gesture of innocence.*

Kyle Shane: Hey, I get it, I'm sorry. Most museums have rules about touching the art too, but there's nothing wrong with admiring a masterpiece from afar, is There?

*Olivia scoffs, despite herself. This smug kid is actually trying to hit on her. For a second her mood is still tense, as if she's not sure if she wants to hit him or not. But his smile is easy and he keeps his distance.*

Olivia Xavier: I don't like smooth talk either. Besides, you've come with a little bit of a reputation, Kyle Shane.

Kyle Shane: I wish I could say the same about you, beautiful. Truth is, I know I've seen your face before... somewhere....

*He rubs his chin, musing over where he could have seen her before. Olivia tenses up anew before she shakes her head.*

Olivia Xavier: You're mistaken, Kyle. I guess I've got one of those faces.

Kyle Shane: Hmmmm... No I got nothing. It'll come to me, I guess...

*Olivia, having ran out of patience, decides to get to the point.*

Olivia Xavier: Look, I'm busy, and I don't have time for this.

Kyle Shane: Ha, I'm really looking forward to seeing you go. I mean, how you move. In the ring!

*Olivia rolls her eyes, but she can't help but smirk.*

Olivia Xavier: Could you be more of an obvious tool?

Kyle Shane: I'm sure I could... If you gave me a little time to try. But listen, it is exciting to see new talent breaking into the PCW around the same time as me, and I look forward to seeing how far you'll go. Honestly, that's what I meant to say.

*Olivia can't resist poking at him a little bit, making a stab at his ego*

Olivia Xavier: Hmmm, yeah, maybe I can breeze through an opponent or two and be rewarded with a shot at the Underground Championship.

*Kyle, for the first time, becomes aware of the belt he has laid over his shoulder, and he clutches it anxiously.*

Kyle Shane: What - you -no, lady, you don't want to get mixed up with this, the Underground division has some really sick, messed up people in it, that can kick really hard. Better stay away from that.

*Olivia leans in closer, narrowing her eyes--managing to fluster Kyle some without really doing anything above and beyond.*

Olivia Xavier: You have no idea what I can take.

*Smirking faintly, she leans back to a normal and upright position before she turns to leave.*

Olivia Xavier: See you around, champ.

*As she's walking away, Kyle finally realizes this is a situation where he would have been trying to take control and schmooze with her. Almost too late, and too awkwardly, he calls out after her, mentally kicking himself after he gets the words out.*

Kyle Shane: We should hang out sometime! ... Fuck, Kyle, what did you do...

*Kyle takes another look at Olivia's retreating backside, and then he walks the other way into the backstage area as the scene switches back to Jerry and Ace.*

Jerry Andrews: Well!

Ace Anderson: Can’t say I blame him, though.

Jerry Andrews: Ace… nevermind.

Match One

Debut Match

Olivia Xavier vs. High Tide

Referee: Tyrone Little, Jr.

Sasha Greene: The following is scheduled for one fall, making his way to the ring, from the good ship Jolly Roger, weighing in at 195 pounds... HIGH TIDE!!

With very little lighting and effects that simulate lightning, High Tide (in a pirate outfit) walks down the ramp slightly crouched over, as if he was sitting. He holds a large pirate flag in one hand, and in the other he is imitating steering a ship. He does this until he gets to the ring where he motions dropping and anchor and proceeds to hop onto the turnbuckle and dive headfirst over the ropes, rolling into a standing position. Then he climbs the nearest turnbuckle and pulls out a spyglass, looking around at the audience. He mimics loading a cannon and as he motions firing it, he jumps off the turnbuckle into the ring (to imitate recoil) as fireworks shoot from all four turnbuckles.

Ace Anderson: Gotta love old High Tide. Anyone that still rocks buccaneer boots and a sash in this day and age is my hero, and a fashion icon.

Jerry Andrews: Unfortunately for Tide, this ain’t the catwalk. He may be looking to make his opponent walk the plank, though.

Sasha Greene: And his opponent, making her PCW in-ring debut, from Pittsburgh, PA, weighing in at 157 pounds... OLIVIA XAVIER!!

As the overhead lights slowly begin to dim, the blended synth and violin opening of 'Quicksilver' by The Cruxshadows hits the sound system. Amidst the pulsating beat, the deep and resonant voice of Rogue himself makes itself known, intoning over the music as the arena goes dark. The full-blown blackout is timed with when he finishes and the song itself briefly goes silent.

I should be ashamed for what you've done to me.
It's only happened because I let it be...but no more.

As the instrumental bridge picks back up after that pause, green and white sparks tumbling down from the ceiling to form a veritable curtain of illumination-- and before it stands Olivia Xavier herself, visible only as a silhouette due to the falling pyros behind her. Even without a clear sight of her, the crowd can be heard cheering for her, albeit not as loudly as they would more established fan favorites. Her shoulders square and her hands at her sides, she remains as still as can be until the sparks taper off to nothing and the chorus picks up with a vengeance.

I'm taking back my love, taking back my pride,
taking back my dreams... and my life.
This is the ground I will defend.
A rage of angels bears the end.

White and green lights flash along both sides of the ramp as the overhead lights come back up to partial illumination to augment the two colors. Spurred into motion by the sound of the vocals kicking in, Olivia's fists thrust themselves into the air for a moment before she's making her way down the ramp. The fans aren't completely ignored, a hand slapped here or there-- but when she reaches the bottom of the ramp, she pauses, her head turning in either direction to take in the crowd.

I'm taking back my hope, taking back my goals,
taking back my memories... and my soul.
This brand is forged to my crusade.
Quicksilver, the future belongs to the brave.

Once she's seen as much as she wants to see, Olivia suddenly surges forward with a burst of speed in order to smoothly slide into the ring on her stomach. Quickly climbing to her feet, a few strides carry her over to her corner of the ring. She climbs onto the second set of ropes, she once again surveys the crowd before she's hopping down and going through a few basic stretches, her music fading as she waits for the match to begin.

Jerry Andrews: I think the PCW faithful are anxious to get a good look at what Olivia Xavier is capable of.

Ace Anderson: I think ALL of us are anxious to get a good look at what Olivia Xavier is capable of.

Olivia moves towards Tide, who attempts to shoot in for a takedown, but Olivia dodges to the side and nails his injured arm with a straight kick. Tide grits his teeth and shakes his arm. He grapples Olivia again, but Olivia wrings his arm and snaps off several more kicks. Olivia wrings Tide's injured arm, twisting it into a wristlock. Tide grunts in pain. He reverses into a hammerlock on Olivia. Olivia twists and tries to escape his grasp, then stomps on his foot and elbows him with her free arm. Tide finally releases the hold. Olivia goes for a kick, but he catches her foot, plants a hand on her chest, and shoves her away with force. Olivia simply rolls back into a crouched position, and the two of them come towards each other again. They grapple, and Tide twists Olivia's arm into a wristlock. Olivia is able to perform a cartwheel to relieve the pressure on her arm, then she drops down for a leg sweep kick. Xavier covers...

Jerry Andrews: Early attempt at a pinfall!

...1!

…...2 - kickout!

Olivia, not wasting a second, applies a keylock on Tide's arm. Tide shakes his head in pain and attempts to elbow Olivia off. Olivia floats over into a front facelock, trying to choke him out, then she readjusts the hold and applies a rear chinlock with her knee in Tide's back.

Jerry Andrews: Great use of chain wrestling by Olivia to wear High Tide down. She is certainly showing a high degree of prowess so far.

Ace Anderson: I've got to say I'm impressed, Olivia Xavier is much more than just a pretty face.

As the crowd starts getting behind Olivia and Tide, clapping for them, Tide begins pulling himself up to a vertical base. He elbows Olivia off of him from a kneeling position. Olivia comes right back at him, lighting him up with several kicks to the midsection, and then she grabs his arm and springs to the ropes, springing up onto the second rope and then hopping over the top rope while holding High Tide's hand, and as she comes down she yanks his injured arm on the top rope with force. Tide stumbles back, and holds his arm. Tide comes back to the ropes to grab Olivia, but she gives him a shoulder thrust. Tide drops to one knee, and Olivia runs off the ropes and as she comes back, she performs a short modified reverse hurricanrana to the doubled over High Tide that drives him face first into the canvas. Olivia then locks on a Fujiwara armbar, yanking Tide's injured arm and shoulder as she wrenches it upwards. The referee, holding a towel, asks Tide if he gives up. Tide refuses. Olivia bends his arm back at an uncomfortable angle, but Tide still refuses to give up.

Ace Anderson: Olivia Xavier is giving High Tide all new reasons to scream the word "Yarrrgh!"

Jerry Andrews: You know that's actually a misconception the movies created, right?

Ace Anderson: Oh, all of a sudden you're a stickler for pirate linguistics? Call the match, you nerd.

Olivia breaks off the hold, and stomps on Tide's fingers. She grips his arm, trying to lift him up and twist the arm at the same time, but Tide explodes with a clothesline from his free arm that flips Olivia completely over. Tide gets to his feet, shaking out his injured arm. Tide lifts Olivia up and performs a vertical suplex, then lets his injured arm drop to his side as he holds her up in the air for several moments, before making Olivia crash back to the mat with force. Tide lifts Olivia up and whips her off the ropes, giving her a one-armed version of a back body drop on the return. Tide paces around, a determined expression on his face. Olivia gets to her feet, and Tide boots her in the gut and goes to give her a DDT. Olivia spins out of it and wrings his arm. Olivia floats behind him with a hammerlock, but Tide elbows her until she loosens the hold. Tide runs her backwards until she is rammed into the turnbuckles with force. Olivia releases the hold, and Tide pulls her out with one arm and plants her with a sidewalk slam. High Tide goes for a cover.

...1!

…...t - kickout!

High Tide walks over, and he stomps on Olivia's back and applies a modified camel clutch, wrapping Olivia's arms around her throat and pulling back. Olivia lets out a choked yell of pain.

Jerry Andrews: Despite the fact that his arm must be killing him to even move it, High Tide still fights on.

The referee asks Olivia if she gives up, but Olivia refuses. Tide finally releases the hold after several more moments. He brings his backside down with force across Olivia's lower back. Olivia tries to get to her feet, but Tide lifts her up, clubbing her relentlessly over the back with his good arm. He lifts her up on his shoulders, going for an air raid crash. Olivia wiggles her legs and slides off his shoulders, then as he turns around and charges at her but Olivia sweeps his legs from under him with a drop toehold, rolls through and maneuvers as if to lock in a rolling single leg Boston crab, but then she repositions the legs and applies a grapevine inverted bridging STF, or sickle hold. Tide's eyes bug out of his head at being caught in this unexpected submission. The referee asks if he gives up, but Tide refuses.

Jerry Andrews: Looking at her resume, Olivia Xavier boasts an amazing degree of technical prowess, and specialty in some very lethal submission holds.

Ace Anderson: So boys at home, she's not the type of girl who you take home to mother... because she could break your mother's arm.

Jerry Andrews: ...Why in god's name would she - Mother?!

Olivia releases the hold, only to float over and bend both his arms back into a scissored kimura lock, the Reaching for Hope. Tide yells in pain as his wrist is twisted painfully. Olivia shouts that he has to give up.

Jerry Andrews: Olivia Xavier damaging the arm has come into play!

High Tide yells that he won't quit, matey. Olivia simply tightens the hold. Several moments pass by. Finally, Olivia releases the hold, seeing that she would either have to snap the arm or find another tactic. She shakes her head in frustration. Attempting to lift Tide up, but he's too heavy. Olivia pounds on his injured shoulder. Tide shoves her away. Olivia comes running back in and boots him viciously in the side of the head. Tide stumbles and falls to the mat, facedown. Olivia stomps on his hand and then gives his arm a knee drop. Tide yells and holds his arm in pain. Olivia motions for him to get up. As he gets to his feet, Olivia doubles High Tide over with a spinning back kick to the midsection, then she runs off the ropes and hits a running variation of a double knee facebuster. Olivia then runs to the ropes, jumps up to the second rope and springs off backwards with a hands-free Asai moonsault. The crowd is starting a chant for Olivia.

Jerry Andrews: Olivia is just raining down punishment on High Tide Tide.

Ace Anderson: No doubt about it, she's sexy, but she is a man-eater.

Jerry Andrews: I wonder where you got that one.

Ace Anderson: You can thank the prophets Hall and Oates for that one, boyo.

Olivia, instead of going for the pin, attempts to lift Tide up. She starts to go for a reverse STO but Tide elbows her off with his good arm. Olivia turns around and gets a back elbow. Olivia stumbles again, right into a back suplex. Tide peels Olivia off the mat and gives her a harsh snap suplex. Olivia arches her lower back in pain. Tide then applies a single leg Bostom crab, bending Olivia's leg back as far as it'll go. Olivia shouts in pain. Olivia tries to grab the bottom ropes out of instinct. Tide pulls her back out into the middle of the ring anyway and sits back on the hold. Olivia screams in pain, and flails her arms. She grits her teeth to keep from shouting any more. Tide finally gets back up, lifting Olivia up, and plants her with a double underhook powerbomb. Tide rolls his injured shoulder to try and get some feeling. He lifts Olivia up, going for a shiranui, but Olivia slips loose and elbows him right in the clavicle. Tide yells in pain and grips his shoulder. Olivia boots him in the gut to make him double over and drop to his knees. Olivia then runs off the ropes and goes for a shining wizard, but he ducks the swing of the kick and before her momentum can carry her around, he lifts her up on his shoulders and grabs on, then drops her with a reverse Death valley Driver. Tide then rests against the ropes, trying to get some feeling back in his arm.

Jerry Andrews: High Tide is feeling his sea salt now!

High Tide lets out a mighty roar, and then he paces around the ring, shaking and getting fired up. He walks over to the ropes and goes up onto the second turnbuckle, before jumping off and meeting a rising Olivia Xavier with a cannonball like double footed dropkick that throws her backwards.

Jerry Andrews: High Tide hit the Half Mast!

Ace Anderson: You know, High Tide may invite some pretty dirty jokes with the name of that move, but if you ever find yourself in that situation, you should consult a doctor.

Jerry Andrews: I... think we should focus on the match...!!

High Tide rests on the mat for a second, and he rolls his arm, trying to get some feeling back into it. Olivia, gasping for air after being smashed in the chest, is over by the ropes. High Tide, being the salty dog he is, walks over, lifting Olivia up and raking her face across the bottom rope, back and forth. Olivia shrieks, the referee admonishes High Tide. Tide then grabs Olivia's legs pulls her out of the ropes, and tries to turn her over into a Sharpshooter. Olivia resists with everything she has to keep him from locking her legs together. She reaches up and pounds on his head, then kicks him in the face a few times. Tide simply stops trying to lock in the submission, then he grips both of her legs and falls back with a catapult, throwing her up into the corner. Olivia, however, is able to spring up at the last second and hop onto the second rope, then she resets herself and springs off the ropes, but she runs right into a big boot from Tide that catches her in midair and nearly decapitates her. Olivia does a flip in midair, then flops to the mat. He lifts Olivia up and gives her a lifting t-bone suplex. Olivia lands on her lower back, and lets out a scream of pain. Tide walks over, and clubs Olivia a few times, then gives her a vertical suplex, holding on as he rolls his hips and lifting her up for a second vertical suplex. He holds on and rolls to his feet a third time, lifting her back up, and he resets himself and pops off a rolling Northern lights suplex. Olivia is flung across the ring. Tide walks over and lifts her up with his good arm, and he goes to lift her up on his shoulders again for the over the shoulder DDT, but Olivia elbows him in the side of the head again and again, until he loosens the hold. Olivia slips down from the front and counters into a sit-out, X-Factor like facebuster. The crowd pops for Olivia at this sudden reversal. Olivia then rests for a moment, catching her breath.

Jerry Andrews: Olivia Xavier is showing me a great degree of toughness in this match.

Olivia Xavier lifts High Tide up, begins a move with a shoulder neckbreaker, before hanging on and floating over into a DDT, also known as the '68 Comeback special, also known as the Fall From Grace. Olivia covers...

...1!

…….2!

………...thr - Kickout!

A flabbergasted Olivia looks up at the ref incredulously, asking if that was three. The ref assures her it was a long two count. Olivia, gritting her teeth, goes to lift High Tide up. She irish whips him into the corner, and backs up, going to follow him in for a stinger splash, but High Tide amazingly recovers in time to slip out between the top and middle rope, and meet an incoming Olivia with a corner enziguri. Olivia stumbles out, holding her temple, and High Tide flings himself out at her and nails a DDT from between the ropes. High Tide rests, barely able to use the ropes to keep his footing, and then he raises an arm to the crowd and lets out a hearty "Arrrrhhh" and he begins ascending the turnbuckle. He's heading up top for the Man Overboard splash, but Olivia shoots into the ropes before he can get to the top. High Tide's eyes open wide as his genitals are introduced in a painful way to the steel. The crowd gives a sympathetic groan that sounds pirate like, "Oooooh... yarrrrgh."

Ace Anderson: Not his buried treasures!!

Olivia, just to make it worse, shakes the ropes, bouncing Tide on the top rope. Then, she flings him down to the mat. High Tide is writhing around, holding his jewels in pain. Olivia calmly walks over and straps him in an omoplata submission. High Tide's eyes bug out of his head as she pulls back on the lethal MMA hold, ripping at the already wounded arm.

Jerry Andrews: Olivia Xavier has introduced High Tide to the Price of Pride!

High Tide's arm is bent uncomfortably from the painful hold. He yells and contorts in pain but Olivia has made it impossible for him to maneuver out of it, and he is too far from the ropes. High Tide frantically taps out with his free hand.

Ding Ding Ding

Winner: Olivia Xavier via Submission

Olivia gets to her feet gracefully, wiping her hair out of her eyes and looking around at the crowd which has begun accepting her with a smile. High Tide is rolling around on the mat, holding his arm.

Jerry Andrews: An incredible debut for Olivia Xavier here tonight, she put on quite a show for us.

Ace Anderson: Olivia Xavier is lethal! I wonder what's next for this woman.

Olivia stands in the ring, holding her arms up for a moment before exiting the ring and heading back up the ramp - the ‘tron firing up to life shortly after she moves backstage.

The feed is deep backstage, focusing in on two workers engaged in a frantic search through a pile of luggage in the common area locker room. They're both harried, frazzled looking young ladies wearing headsets and carrying walkie talkies. The first one looks through a bag, with the desperate eyes of someone who is at their wits end.

Production worker #1: ...it has to be here, if Mister Fierce's bag isn't recovered we are in such deep trouble.

Production worker #2: Look here, maybe someone hid it in this bag!

The second production assistant throws her arms up in abject defeat. She's tired, fretting about losing this job and anxious.

Production worker #2: Annie, what are we doing, Mister Fierce's bag went missing hours ago, and it isn't going to turn up stuffed in somebody else's gym bag.

Production worker #1: I know that, Britta, but where else could it be? His handbag contains his wallet and all his credit cards. He is the World Champion, in case you forgot, and he holds a lot of pull around here. If we don't find his bag and his wallet, we could both lose our jobs.

The first production worker squints suspiciously.

Production worker #1: Plus doesn't he still hold some position of authority?

Production worker #2:Ugh, who knows, it's like a revolving door around this place.

Her eyes narrow as she gives her blonde compatriot a funny look.

Production worker #2: Hmmm, you know what's funny, there's one person we haven't asked about this.

Production worker #1: What? Who??

Production worker #2: Somebody who's been hanging around the wrestlers locker rooms all day, someone who is itching to hop into the sack with a slice of beefcake...

Annie sees the fist of where her friend is going with this, and stamps her foot down in outrage.

Production worker #1: You really think I would steal a bag just so I could, what, get attention from Mister Fierce when someone recovers it, and that in that incredibly unlikely scenario he would be so thankful he would ask me out on a date?

Production worker #2: I'm just saying, someone seems thirsty for attention, that's all...

Production worker #1: ...Do you NOT know Mister Fierce is....? That he doesn't like...

Britta looks at her, head tilted, not knowing where she's going with this at all.

Production worker #2: He doesn't like What?

Production worker #1: Ugh nevermind, this is hopeless, it's a completely unlikely scenario, I mean he probably lost it on his own, it's not like there's anybody who is stupid or childish enough to root through people's gym bags and steal their personal belongings like their wallet and their credit cards.

So saying, the two backstage workers leave the locker room. A couple minutes pass, and then Kyle Shane, bare chested except for a towel wrapped around his waist, emerges from the showers into the locker room. He pulls out a bag with a butterfly and DF monogrammed onto it from his locker. He carelessly throws it over his shoulder after he extracts the credit card he was looking for, and he pulls out his cell phone.

Kyle Shane: Yeah, hi, Build a Bear? Listen, I was looking to order a gift basket for this girl at my work. Girls like bears and stuff, right? ...Yeah, I don't know what she's into, but I know she likes breaking arms... and maybe put a tag on it with something cute like "To Liv". Yeah right.

He listens for a second, then glances at the credit card again.

Kyle Shane: Yeah, listen, I'm going to charge this on my credit card. The name on the card is Dan Fierce... The number on the front is 4705443506813577... expiration date 5/18. So, get that delivered next week? Cool, thanks.

Kyle hangs up the phone. He looks at the stolen card for a second, as if considering what he's just fine. Then he throws it in a nearby trash can.

Kyle Shane: Chaotic good.

He says, before walking off to put on some clothes, and the scene switching back to the announcer table.

Ace Anderson: That was… interesting?

Jerry Andrews: We knew he was on his way here, and he’s been a figure of interest in PCW lately.

Ace Anderson: Fierce is going to be -

Jerry Andrews: Yeah. I know.

Match Two

Singles Match

Kyle Shane vs. Tyrone “Crazy Boy” Smith

Referee: Joseph Buckland

The lights flicker and fade out as the pulsating beats of Dope Star Inc's "10000 Watts of Artificial Pleasure" pops on the PA system. Smoke fills the arena as a figure stands in the middle of it. All the sudden, Crazy Boy comes out of the smoke and pumps a fist in the air. He walks down the entryway and climbs the ropes of the ring. He bounces around the ropes a few times, pumps his fist in the air one last time and waits for his opponent to come.

The opening notes of "In The Morning And Amazing" by Circa Survive begins to play. The big screen shows shots of Kyle’s matches. Kyle Shane steps slowly out onto the stage. The Assassins hood to his longcoat is pulled low over his face. The distinctive voice of Anthony Green hits the bridge:

"And how could anyone
You are in my dreams
Half human, half machine
You with someone else that I have felt and seen
I cannot rest, or my consciousness contest
Looking right through the lens
From winter brings the spring again"

Kyle tilts his head back and holds his arms out, taking in the reception of the crowd. For the PCW faithful that are just getting to know him, there is a modest show of respect, but the truly dedicated that have followed his career stir mightily. Some on the sides of the aisles even make a fanning bow motion as Kyle walks by. 1/2 the way down the aisle, Kyle pivots, holding his arms up to either side of him. He climbs onto the apron. Kyle balances on the ropes for a moment, points to himself and smirks, holding his arms out, and then he hops down, takes off his longcoat and stretches a few times to get ready.

Buckland steps forward to give direction, both men listening attentively and nodding as the referee completes his instructions. The bell rings and we’re underway!

Crazy Boy wastes no time, racing at Crazy Boy with a sliding basement dropkick to the lower legs. Crazy Boy, in rebuttal, astonishingly SOMERSAULTS over Kyle and turns to face him as Kyle rises quickly to his feet. The key to this matchup seems to be dictating the pace. Both men have their own distinct styles and BOTH must surely want to control the rhythm. It’s an important thing to keep in mind; it could very well be the deciding factor here tonight. Kyle will want to keep everything fast. Fast, fast, fast. Crazy Boy, on the other hand, will need to control with a less-blitzy offense ... keep the pace slower so that Kyle can’t out-quick him and is forced to out-wrestle him.

Crazy Boy bouncing a second time, Kyle goes to drop prone on the mat but Crazy Boy offers his own sliding dropkick and manages to catch Kyle dead square in the ribs before he hits the mat. Kyle caught completely unawares, his midsection was exposed the entire time and it bit him. Clever prognostication by Crazy Boy. Kyle wriggling in pain on the mat, Crazy Boy sidles up next to him and reaches across Kyle’s prone body ... holding the opposite side and driving a vicious knee into the ribs.

Kyle tries to cover up with his right arm, but the impact of the knee just crashes into the elbow joint instead of the ribs. He’s avoiding the impact to a wounded area by offering up another area to be wounded. Will Crazy Boy change his gameplan to adapt to Kyle’s defense or will he continue to target the ribs? The arm doesn’t really offer much in the way of taking away Kyle’s main weapons ... but the RIBS do all SORTS of collateral damage up to and INCLUDING affecting breathing and mobility on the whole.

Crazy Boy backing away, seeing that his knees aren’t getting though Kyle’s shield of an arm at the moment. Kyle’s arm held close to his ribs, the entire upper right side of Kyle looking to be in serious condition. Crazy Boy can smell the blood in the water and moves in for the attack but Kyle responds to a dashing clothesline with a duck followed by a free-legged enzugiri! Crazy Boy is rocked as he staggers back a few steps. Kyle’s lightning quick feet charging up, we’ll see how the weakened ribs are faring in the next few telling moments.

As Crazy Boy staggers back towards the ropes, Kyle takes off and ... in a sudden shift of direction ... avoids frontal impact and instead take a sharp right, leaping onto and then OFF OF the middle rope. Bouncing back, Kyle catches Crazy Boy flush on the chin with a springboard dropkick that sends Crazy Boy tumbling to the outside. Kyle staring down at him, he knows that the ball is in HIS court and he needs to make every second count.

Crazy Boy opening and closing his jaw to check whether or not he may have broken it, he manages to see the shadow of Kyle getting closer and closer to him from above. A beautiful plancha by Kyle and ... nothing. Crazy Boy manages to step back enough to cause Kyle to hit the floor right in front of him, crashing and burning at the exact wrong time. Crazy Boy clearing the cobwebs enough to realize the fortune afforded him, he grabs Kyle under the arms ... helping him up enough to roll him into the ring.

A split-second later, Crazy Boy is on top for the cover.

...1!

…...2!

NO! Kyle gets the left shoulder up at two, breaking the pinfall and keeping the match alive. Crazy Boy moving away from Shane, he’s finishing the reboot process and is in full-on attack mode as he pursues the recovering Shane. Grabbing a fist full of hair, Crazy Boy drags Kyle to his feet and lands a beautiful short-armed clothesline. A second one. On the third trip, Crazy Boy brings Kyle Shane in and BAM! A crack to the jaw delivered first class to one Kyle Shane drops to the mat, free from Crazy Boy’s grip and free from the tether that was holding him up. A drop to his knees and Kyle goes for the second cover attempt.

...1!

......tw - no!

Crazy Boy with the kickout at two. Tyrone is fighting with every fiber of his being, the crowd seems to be getting behind the impressive show of determination ... cheering the man on. Shane ignores the growing swell of support for Crazy Boy, dragging him to his feet and peppering him with lefts and rights. Smith covering up as best he can as he slowly makes his way into the corner. Drawing himself into a tight, close-quarters combat situation may not be the wisest course of action, but he manages to sucker Crazy Boy into the corner and ... in a flash, REVERSAL! Kyle Shane is on the outside after having slipped under a tad-too-wide haymaker, laying into Crazy Boy with knees and chops that have him withering under the barrage of strikes. Kyle forced into a seated position, Crazy Boy backs out of the corner with a new vigor ... stalking ... waiting for Kyle to leave the comforts of his corner of the ring. Kyle BLAZES forward, catching Crazy Boy off guard with a savage heart kick worthy of Murdoc!

Ace Anderson: Oh my god, is he gonna pull it off!?

Jerry Andrews: Here it comes!

Wrapping an arm tight around the reeling Crazy Boy’s head, Kyle Shane makes one last MASSIVE exertion and whips him around in a headlock driver!

Ace Anderson: Pieces of Eden!

Shane throws an arm over Tyrone, Buckland dropping into place to make the count.

...1!

…...2!

……….

………….3!!!

Jerry Andrews: He did it!

Winner: Kyle Shane via Pinfall

"In The Morning And Amazing" by Circa Survive once again plays out of the loudspeakers, Kyle Shane making his way backstage.



Ace Anderson: A great match. Tonight’s going well so far!

Jerry Andrews: But before we continue, a special airing of Seromine’s submitted video package!

Ace Anderson: Heh. Package.




A shot of daylight shows on the ‘tron. The super 8 footage is full of scratches, burns and grain. The sky is blue. Birds are chirping. And the sound of whistling is in the air. It’s of no real importance, but the melody would remind one of something you would hear in church. Sure enough, the camera pans to show a maskless Seromine, sitting on a tarped object. He’s seen looking around. His whistle turns into a hum, as he turns his head around.

“Why hello there, friends! My, isn’t today a lovely day? I was just sitting here, counting my blessings and thanking God for providing such natural beauty. I’m happy that you’re all here.”

Seromine turns his head away, whispering “Yes indeed, happy to have you all...” in a methodical cadence. He then pries himself up and turns his body around so that it practically blocks out the sun from view. His long hair sweeps gently in the light breeze that passes by. Seromine turns back around to face his audience.

“I bet ya’ll are wondering just what I’m doing out here, ain’t ya? Well...I guess I can give you your present now.” he grins like a cheshire cat. The brim of his hat shadowing his widened eyes, as he motions his followers into view. They as well are maskless. Circling around the object, they work together and pull the tarp away like it was a body bag. Underneath it is a car that has sustained some serious damage from a crash. Seromine slowly saunters around, surveying what is before him. Suddenly, he’s stopped in his tracks by something.

“Well, well, well! What is this?”

The camera moves in to reveal “KELLY WAS HERE” painted in white, with a sad face underneath the text. Seromine seems moved by this, as he takes his hat off and lays it across his heart. He then has everyone bow their heads with him as they engage in a silent prayer. After the “Amen” is spoken, he puts his hat back on, and looks again towards the camera.

“My. My. These accidents sure do happen...don’t they, Richard?” he smirks “As the little birds chirp, they tell me a drunk driver caused this. But curiously, you yourself...partook in the devil’s brew because of your guilt from this incident. I know ALL about you. I know about your selfish, impure ways. I know about your resentment. Please, don’t misconstrue my words as an indictment. But heed them just the same.”

He crouches down and places his hand across the wrecked driver’s side door.

“Ephesians chapter four, verses thirty-one and thirty-two says: ”Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”

The followers stand with their arms raised in the air. Eyes closed and mouthing the chant heard at Collision Course. Seromine stands back up and surveys the damage one last time. Slowly, his head turns towards to view the camera again. His expression is ominous.

“Accidents have a way of happening...but I forgive you, Richard. After all, I’m your way to salvation. But you take care now...”

His look recedes into the welcoming, warm cheer he first exuded at the beginning of this. Returning to his hymn whistling, he leads his followers out of view.




Ace Anderson: That was… disturbing?

Jerry Andrews: Much as I hate to admit it, Ace, I’m inclined to agree with you.

Ace Anderson: That’s even MORE disturbing - on to the next match!

Match Three

Singles Match

“Dollface” Kelli Starr vs. Andy D

Referee: Nigel Gale

The arena lights go down as the start of "Damn Nation," by Lower Than Atlantis starts up. As the first verse kicks in, a couple of spotlights start to scan over random sections of the crowd as the letters AD are emblazoned on the big screen, with various video highlights of Andy's career visible only within the letters themselves.

”You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink.
You can lead your lambs to slaughter if it's what the shepherd thinks,”

As the chorus starts up on the song, an explosion of Pyros go off and the arena lights all come back up to reveal Andy standing in the center of the ring. He stands there for a moment, soaking up the reactions of the crowd before he removes his bucket hat and places it on the steel pole part of the turnbuckle, ready for the match.

”(Hard Dance) Hero (Monstercat Release)," by Pegboard Nerds (feat. Elizaveta) comes shimmering out of the PCW loudspeakers as rainbow spotlights flicker over the entryway.

“Hero hero...
Hero hero...


Hero hero...
I wanna be a hero, hero...”

The bass kicks in and the multicolored spotlights snap to the top of the ramp, neon pink pyros sparking off as Dollface appears! Dancing and bouncing she makes her way to the ring, posing for selfies with fans, giving high fives, having herself a rave party on her way! She reaches ringside and hops up onto the apron, wiping her boots before stepping between the ropes and playing it up for the crowd.

Nigel calls for the bell. Starr and Andy D circle each other as Andy D does what he can to get the crowd on his side. Andy hits the ropes for a head of steam, clocking Kelli with a flying forearm, but not getting the whole impact in. It knocks Kelli back into the corner, but does very little else. Andy charges in, looking for a monkey flip, but Dollface shoves him off, sending him rolling across the ring. He catches himself in a three point stance, glowering at Kelli from the opposite corner.

Andy stands up, nodding at Starr, applauding respectfully. They circle each other again. He hits the ropes again, but this time, his momentum is halted by a drop toe hold from the Candy Girl. She delivers a quick backhand to the back of his head as an exclamation point before scrambling to her feet. Andy slowly gets up, checking his face for contusions and scrubbing the back of his head.

Kelli darts off of the ropes, rushing her opponent. Andy D is quick to bound off of the second rope, greeting her intrusion with a missile drop kick that knocks Starr to the mat with a resounding thud. Andy gathers her from the mat and whips her to the corner, following closely behind and connecting with a dropkick to the back that sandwiches her in the corner, ample chest first.

Without wasting any time, he puts Dollface in a headlock, dropping her in the middle of the ring with a running bulldog. He drops for a cover, but it's far too early. He barely gets a one count. Andy rushes the ropes while his foe is prone, rebounding with a beautiful textbook moonsault, but Starr gets her knees up.

Whilst Andy writhes in agony, clutching his ribcage, Kelli regains her vertical base, albeit a bit slower this time around. Starr collects Andy from the mat, only to send him right back down with a hip toss powerslam.

Jerry Andrews: This promises to be a great match. Two fan favorites tangling it up…

Suddenly, "Where Do I Go, but to the Lord," rings over the sound system. The crowd jeers soundly as Seromine and Destiny, complete in their owl masks saunter out from the back, flanked by the Followers.

Ace Anderson: Uh oh. Looks like Salvation looks to make their presence known.

Jerry Andrews: This doesn't look good for Dollface. The whole crew is here. And she's out there all by herself.

The collective group stands atop the ramp, just staring down at the ring. They each hold a candle, unified in their death stare at Dollface. The arena lights flicker ominously, menacingly. A large wooden crucifix lowers solemnly behind the group, an effigy of Nathan Saniti. Seromine strikes a mock crucifixion pose, his head to the ground. Suddenly, he snaps his attention back to the ring. As he does, the cross goes ablaze! Kelli's eyes are glued to the sacrilegious inferno, her mouth agape in disbelief.

Jerry Andrews: Holy cow! Get the fire brigade out here!

Ace Anderson: Just who is he trying to send a message to here? Kelli or Nathan?

Andy D takes advantage of the distraction, rolling Kelli up on a schoolboy pin attempt. Starr manages to kick out after a two count, but she barely gets upright before Andy clocks her with another flying forearm. He scales the turnbuckles.

Jerry Andrews: Schmerzilch! Another cover!

Ace Anderson: No! Kelli's leg found the bottom rope!

Andy yells in disbelief, grasping his head and practically ripping out his hair. He shuffles to his feet, pulling Kelli with him. He Irish whips her to the ropes, leapfrogging over her on the first bounce. He drops to his back as Dollface returns, catching her with his feet, but the wily woman flips into the momentum, landing on her feet. Andy kips up as Starr hits the ropes. He looks to leapfrog again, but Dollface aims high with a jumping spear that crashes them both to the mat.

Kelli peers up from the impact to see that the whole of Salvation has disappeared, the backstage attendants snuffing the conflagration with extinguishers as the match continued. Now it's Starr's turn to climb the corner. She perches, waiting patiently for Andy to stand full before leaping off with a Sugar High!

Kelli hooks a leg, but just gets a strong two count. She yanks her opponent off of the mat, careening him to the ropes and pulling him back down with a necktie clothesline. She blazes to her feet and begins dub-stepping the ever living hell out of Andy D. Andy catches the last stomp, pulling her to even keel with a single leg drag. Andy hops up as Kelli sit upright. Andy delivers an Dragon's Bite that rings her bell.

..1!

.....2!

..THRE-NO!

Jerry Andrews: How the actual hell did Kelli kick out of that one?

Andy smacks the mat in frustration. Andy yanks Kelli to her feet, shoving her hard into the corner. He follows her in, leaping up into the air for a hurricanrana, but Starr hooks her arms around the ropes. Andy goes crashing onto the back of his head. Dollface stumbles out of the corner as Andy staggers to his feet, holding his noggin. Kelli spins a glancing back fist that barely catches Andy on the temple, but it was still enough to send him back to the mat.

Ace Anderson: She didn't quite get all of that Candygram.

Starr bounces off of the second ropes, landing knees first in Andy's chest.

Jerry Andrews: She Dropped the Bass! There's the cover![/i]

..1!

....2!

......3!

Winner: "Dollface" Kelli Starr via Pinfall

Kelli collapses to her back on the mat, both competitors exhausted. Slowly, Andy regains his footing. Kelli begins to stir as Andy D offers up a hand to help her to her feet. Kelli accepts, pulling Andy into a friendly hug before Andy raises Kelli's hand in victory, the crowd cheering their sportsmanship as they make their way out of the ring and backstage.




Jerry Andrews: What an incredible match!

Ace Anderson: Tonight just keeps getting better and better, and we’ll be RIGHT back after this commercial break!

Ace Anderson: Welcome BACK, ladies and gentlemen, to Pure Class Wrestling’s Thursday night Trauma!

Jerry Andrews: So far tonight we’ve seen a couple of great matches -

Ace Anderson: *sotto voce* Olivia’s match was my favorite…

Jerry Andrews: *blithely ignoring Ace* MOVING ALONG, our next match is pitting hardened veteran Rick Majors against reborn holy roller Seromine!

Match Four

Singles Match

Rick Majors vs. Seromine

Referee: Manny Cruz

Sasha Greene: “Ladies and gentlemen, the following non-title match is scheduled for one fall….”

The lights go out. Suddenly the sound of guitars pierce through the silence as "Wastelands" by Linkin Park begins to play. Rick Majors appears in the entrance way. He pauses for a moment and looks down briefly. He then shakes his head, breathes deeply and stares out at the crowd, stretching his arms and warming up as he walks down to the ring.

This is war with no weapons,
Marching with no stepping,
Murder with no killing,
Illing every direction."

Majors walks slowly, looking out around the arena as he continues his way down to the ring.

"…introducing first, from Toronto, Ontario, Canada...."

In the wastelands of today,
When there's nothing left to lose,
And and there's nothing more to take,
But you force yourself to choose,
In the wastelands of today,
When tomorrow disappears
When the future slips away,
And your hope turns into fear,
In the wastelands of today.

Majors climbs the ring steps and pauses. He turns towards the crowd, standing on the ring apron for a moment before entering the ring. Majors stands in the centre of the ring, looking out towards the crowd. He slowly starts to circle the ring, stretching and loosening up his body.

"... RICK MAJORS"

The lights in the arena then come back on as Majors circles the ring, awaiting the start of the match.

“And his opponent…”

The lights inside of the arena begin to flicker in and out like that of a potential power outage. Within seconds blinding white light flashes and then plunges the faithful into darkness. A sudden candlelight spotlight shines below the stage. Three children who look no older than between seven to ten years old have appeared. All three are dressed in white. Two girls are shown swinging a jump rope as their male counterpart does the jumping. In unison, the three recite this famous bedtime prayer for all to hear:

Now I lay me down to sleep
I pray Salvation my soul to keep
If I should die before I wake
I pray Seromine my soul to take.

Murmurs begin in the crowd as the children giggle and run off into the darkness, thus the end of the spotlight.The sound of a piano and finger snapping turn the ramp into a stained-glass portrait like you would see in a church window. Multiple colors beam from underneath the grating, with SALVATION spelled right down the middle. Bringing Seromine and his followers out from ground level is “Where Could I Go But to the Lord” by Elvis Presley. He and Destiny lead the animal masked group up the stairs and across the stage as the first verses start:

Living below in this old sinful world
Hardly a comfort can afford
Striving alone to face temptation so
Now won't you tell me

While she is seen wearing a black dress with a white collar and carrying his bible, Seromine is dressed as a preacher. His black hat matches the color of his ribbon bow tie, coat and slacks. The female followers are in pastel prairie dresses that are either pink, green or blue. The male followers are in beige button down shirts with matching pants. The group walk down to the ring, each holding a candle in their right hand.

Where could I go but to the Lord?
Where could I go oh where could I go?
Seeking the refuge for my soul
Needing a friend to save me in the end
Won't you tell me
Where could I go but to the Lord?

Ignoring the booing of the fans, they pair off to circle around the ring. One by one, Salvation place their candles inside of stands and remain by them. Seromine removes his hat, mask and coat. His long hair hangs loose in front of his face. Just as his song is turned off and the lighting returns to normal, he is heard telling the fans, “Repent your sins! Your Lord and Savior is here to save you!” while the entire group does the crucifix pose.

“… he is the PCW International Champion: SEROMINE!"

The bell rings and the two men begin circling.

Jerry Andrews: You have to think that this is a big opportunity for Rick Majors. It's a non-title match, but if he can defeat the International Champion here tonight, he’ll put himself right into the title picture.

Ace Anderson: Yes, but Seromine has been on an incredible roll recently. It’s going to be tough.

Jerry Andrews: He did lose to Kelli Starr last Trauma, remember. Plus, Majors has been on quite a roll recently as well.

Ace Anderson: This is going to be one hell of a match.

Majors lunges forward for a lock up, but Seromine sidesteps it and he drives his knee into Majors’ stomach. He then hits him with the point of his elbow, knocking Majors to the mat. Seromine pulls Majors up and throws him into the corner. Seromine charges, but Majors gets his feet up.

Seromine stops at the last second and grabs Majors’ legs. He then pulls Majors out of the corner by his legs, causing him to crash into the mat with a thud.

Jerry Andrews: Seromine seems to be one step ahead of Rick Majors in the early going here.

Seromine pulls Majors up, only to drop him back down with a snap suplex. Majors rolls out of the ring to compose himself.

Ace Anderson: Smart move by Majors. He needs to change up his strategy here.

Suddenly Seromine slides under the bottom rope, hitting Majors with a baseball slide that sends him crashing into the ringside barrier.

Seromine now pulls Rick Majors up and he throws him into the ring. Back inside, Seromine approaches Rick Majors as he is getting to his feet. Majors swings wildly, connecting with a right hand to Seromine’s midsection. Majors now stands up and connects with a mid-level roundhouse kick. He then starts to fire off a series of kicks.

Jerry Andrews: Now Majors has something going!

Majors swings with a right hand, but Seromine ducks it. He then flies forward with a diving clothesline that takes Majors down to the mat.

Ace Anderson: Not for long!

Seromine stands up and drops a leg on Rick Majors. Majors rolls to the ropes and tries to pull himself up. Seromine takes his legs out with a chop block. He then quickly sets Majors up…

Jerry Andrews: Sharpshooter!

Majors struggles in the hold, trying desperately to reach the ropes.

Ace Anderson: Remember, Rick Majors has had extensive back and leg problems in his career and several surgeries. This move has to be killing him.

Majors continues to struggle, slowly crawling his way towards the ropes. Seromine leans back in the hold. Finally Majors manages to get his right hand on the bottom rope. The referee calls for a break. Seromine keeps the hold locked in. The referee starts to count:
1…
2….
3….

Seromine releases the sharpshooter at the four count.

Jerry Andrews: Majors is free from the hold, but it looks like the damage has been done.

Rick Majors remains on the mat, holding his lower back. Seromine walks over and smiles as he pulls his opponent to his feet. Majors fires at him with an elbow to the midsection. Seromine is staggered. Majors swings again, connecting with a big ring hand. And another. And another. Seromine falls to the mat as Rick Majors connects with a clothesline.

Rick Majors takes a moment to compose himself and then he pulls Seromine to his feet. He tries to Irish whip him off the ropes, but Seromine reverses….

Jerry Andrews: Short-armed clothesline!

Ace Anderson: ASHES TO ASHES!

Jerry Andrews: Wow!

Seromine goes for a cover:
1…..
2….
3!!!

Winner: Seromine via pinfall

Seromine stands and raises his arm in the air as the Followers enter the ring. Majors rolls out of the ring, clutching his back. He’s visibly upset as he leaves the ringside area.

Jerry Andrews: Rick Majors tried to put up a fight but, on this night, Seromine seemed to certainly have his number.

Ace Anderson: Another impressive win for Seromine, that’s for sure.

Jerry Andrews: *hand to ear* Hold on, folks! We’ve got something going on backstage!




The feed pops up on the ‘tron, approaching a dressing room, bickering voices heard through the open door. As the camera tech peeks the lens just enough to get a good shot, a well-groomed, dark-haired man in blinding fuschia sequins was in a heated debate with Eira! Her back to the camera, Eira carries on the argument.

“I like Urban Decay, I do, but I’m telling you that Kat Von D. has the superior product here!”

“Bitch, please. Do you REALLY think this queen would wear anything less than the best?”

“I’d expect a queen to know their makeup.”

Fierce gasps. “Did you just go there? Did you DARE to say that to ME!?”

Eira raises an eyebrow. “Do I need to repeat myself? Kat Von D.’s Tattoo liner actually stays ON. Or don’t you work that hard in the ring?”

Dan hooks his thumbs in the Pure Class Wrestling World Championship title strapped around his waist. “I obviously know how to WERK that ring, babygirl. It just so happens that the Waterline Eye Pencil stays on better!”

Without warning, a head of bright pink, curly hair pokes itself around the door frame. “Or, you know, it could just be that you have different skin types so different stuff works. But whatever.”

Dollface scampers off just as impulsively as she’d interjected herself into the conversation, Fierce watching her with a fondly bemused stare. The camera backs up, and the reason for the tech giving ground becomes immediately apparent as a figure enters the scene, one weathered hand gripping a shovel! Fierce catches sight first, Eira blocking his full view.

“Grimm. To what do we owe the honor? I doubt you’re here to exchange makeup tips… I do have the perfect color for you though...”

Eira turns around - directly into a savage shovel strike to the face! She goes down like a marionette with its strings cut, collapsing to the floor!

Fierce jumps back with a yell. “What in the glitterfuck are you DOING!?” Dan picks up the nearest object, Eira’s spiked knee brace, and hurls it straight at Grimm’s head.

*KA-PING!*

Grimm goes batter up and blasts the improvised projectile away with an impatient grunt!

Dan’s eyes widen as Grimm advances. “Why are you DOING this!?”

Grimm, steps over Eira’s fallen body to halt a mere shovel swing away.

“Because she’s not ready for you, Fierce.” His eyes lock with Dan’s, fiery versus icy. “She’s not ready for you, and it’s MY turn.”

Grimm swings the shovel, Fierce ducking! Turning and searching frantically, Fierce manages to lay his hands on a random prop, a disembodied mannequin head! A word on the forehead catching his eye, he’s distracted just long enough to -

*WHUD*

Grimm turns on his heel, the two competitors out cold on the floor. He catches sight of the camera tech, the feed suddenly an acid tripper’s nightmare as it bounces around - and down! The camera clatters to the floor, staring blankly at the chipped plaster of the opposite wall. A hand reaches down… a rough hand, weathered with work-cracked nails…

*quiet beep of a camera powering down*



Jerry Andrews: Oh my god are they - can they let him -

Ace Anderson: Are YOU gonna go stop him?

Jerry Andrews: You’re bigger than me.

Ace Anderson: Doesn’t mean Grimm hasn’t kicked my ass.

Jerry Andrews: Your point?

Ace Anderson: Jerry? Where does a 400 pound gorilla sit?

Jerry Andrews: HARAMBE FOR PRESIDENT!

Ace Anderson: That’s it, Jerry. I’m cutting you off. No more memes for you.

The announcers pause, both of them appearing to listen to their headsets. They confer for a quiet moment, hands over microphones before returning to the broadcast.

Jerry Andrews: Ladies and gentlemen I regret to inform you that the booked Dan Fierce versus Eira match will not be taking place owing to their injuries. The tiple threat match will now be the main event!

Ace Anderson: This is it, folks, the high point of the evening - right after this message from our sponsors!

Main Event

Triple Threat Match

“The Asshole” Whitey Ford vs. Nathan Saniti vs. Grimm

Referee: Ed Lane

The southern style guitars of Bobaflex’s ”Bad Man,” play over the PA system as strobelights and the PCWtron flash white light to the beat of the bass drum. When the music picks up a bit, Ford slowly walks out onto the stage, arms stretched out wide to embrace the hate rained down upon him. Taking great amusement at the crowds disposition, Whitey trades words and insults with the more vocal fans before rolling under the bottom rope.

The introductory chimes of "Monster," by Imagine Dragons beckon the entrance of PCW resident Madcap Magician as lime green fog coats the runway from the ring to the entrance. Flanked by Rasputin, Naomi, and Neville, the otherwise normal (for him) looking Nathan Saniti leads the group out from the back, Nathan taking point. He and Neville wave their arms with a flourish, calling to the fog to rise and engulf the lot.

The lights slowly fade as it thickens as it envelops the Harvesters, suddenly dissipating just as rapidly as it appeared, revealing that the group has vanished! A thunderous bolt of lightning strikes the center of the ring with a blinding flash. And another. After a third bolt hits, the lights go out completely for a second. A column of spotlighted smoke begins to build at the center of the ring, snaking its’ way skyward. Lime green and purple spotlights dance around the smoke as the lights fade on and the smog evaporates, revealing the Harvesters in the center of the ring!

Lights dim and the PCW-Tron goes black. With the sound of a sharp nib scratching across a ragged sheet of parchment, a sepia-toned cursive scrawls grimm across the screen. The name flickers, wavering in and out of focus with the occasional tracking glitch as if projected from an old forgotten film canister uncovered on the bottom shelf in the cellar. Sparse percussion resonates throughout the arena and is soon joined by a droning, distorted bass line. At that, A Perfect Circle’s ”Counting Bodies Like Sheep to the Rhythm of the War Drums” stomps out of the speakers and marches through the aisles. The drums, the distortion, the voices – all work to herald the arrival of the Hangtown Horror.

Don’t fret, precious, I’m here. Step away from the window.

He walks out to a single blue-white spotlight, stops to bask in the light and shadows, and scans the crowd. The Lord of Misrule closes his eyes and takes a deep breath before making the long walk down the ramp, deadset on the ring and ignoring the fans along the way. The spotlight follows. The words work their way up through the layers of the song.

Go back to sleep.

Phinehas climbs up onto the apron and slides in between the ropes. Hopping up onto a turnbuckle, he casts his gaze out over the crowd with his arms at his side, eyes shifting to take in the sea of faces spread out before him. Grimm then drops down. And waits.

Lane steps forward to give his quick instructions, Saniti listening, Grimm stoic, and Whitey leaning against a turnbuckle examining his fingernails.

You know, the usual.

Shooting Ford a dirty look, Lane signals for the bell - and the match begins!

Grimm drops deeper into a defensive stance, Saniti and Ford immediately charging at one another! Saniti gets the upper hand and he clotheslines Ford down to the mat. He delivers several hard stomps to Ford while he’s down, but Grimm interjects himself in, turning Saniti around and locking him up! Saniti breaks free, kicking Grimm in the stomach and connects with a double underhook suplex!

As Saniti returns to his feet, he’s met with a clothesline by Whitey Ford! Ford pulls Nathan back up to his feet and he backs him up into the corner. Whitey drives his knee into Saniti’s midsection, knocking the air out of him! As he chokes, Ford pulls him out of the corner and drops him with a DDT. Whitey goes for the cover -

Ace Anderson: No *BEEP*-ing way.

Jerry Andrews: I thought you weren’t going to announce for his matches?

Ace Anderson: He seems like somewhat less of an utter tool now. Besides, I got scolded for it and I like getting a paycheck.

Jerry Andrews: Got called into the principal’s office?

Ace Anderson: Get *BEEP*-ed, Jerry.

Jerry Andrews: *mutters* ...well that wasn’t very nice…

Ford pulls Saniti up, just as Grimm gets back to his feet. Suddenly, Grimm pulls Saniti up from behind, yanking him away from Ford - but Ford manages to keep his hold, and yanks back! The Mystical Madman yowls with rage as he’s turned into a rope for tug-of-war, finally kicking free! He rolls to the side and under the bottom rope, getting some air around him. Grimm lunges forward with a punch, clocking Ford right upside the head! Ford goes reeling, Grimm dropping him with a quick leg sweep and hooking a leg to make the pin! Lane in position now:

....1!

…...2 - not yet!

Grimm only gets the two count, Ford quickly getting to his feet and he leaps up, hitting Grimm with a kick to the face, knocking him through the ropes! Nathan slips under the bottom rope, coming up behind ford as Whitey holds his focus on Grimm!

Jerry Andrews: Look out, Ford!

Ace Anderson: Shut up, Jerry.

Saniti quickly leaps up and he hits Ford in the back with a dropkick of his own! Saniti reaches down, pulling Ford up only drop him back down to the mat with a snap DDT. Nathan pulls Ford up once more, but Whitey breaks loose and delivers a solid kick into Nathan’s gut! Saniti folds in half! Ford sets Nathan up only to drop him down to the mat with a big sit-out powerbomb! Ford goes for the cover:

...1!

….. - no!

Ford stands up, frustrated, but suddenly Grimm comes flying back into the ring and he drops Ford with a soaring crossbody! Grimm hauls Whitey up to his feet, but Ford blocks his next move! Whitey fires off a fist, punching Grimm in the head - and again! A final headbutt drops the Hangtown Horror, Ford hooking a leg for a quick pin - but Nathan Saniti plows into Whitey with a low angle dropkick!

Jerry Andrews: This is INCREDIBLE!

Ace Anderson: There’s so much give and take in this match - I love it!

Nathan grabs Ford, pulling him up and Irish whipping him into the corner. Nathan takes a few steps back and then charges towards Whitey, flying at him with a shoulder! Ford manages to side step at the last possible second, in true “dick move” fashion - dodges out of the way! Nathan hits the turnbuckles hard, Ford acting quickly, grabbing Nathan and hitting him with a brutal Big European Uppercut! Ford pulls Nathan up once more, only to send him back down to the mat a well-placed knee strike!

Ford drops to cover Nathan, the magician somehow wriggling out from under his assailant. Saniti pulls him up and he Irish whips him off of the ropes, but the crowd’s wild cheering heralds the arrival of Grimm! He runs at Ford with a clothesline, but Whitey ducks it and he rebounds off of the ropes. Leaping at Grimm, Whitey levels a big forearm at the eerie farmer’s face, but Grimm grabs the extended arm and uses it to whip Ford across the ring! The static camera is at just the right angle to be centered on the Nathan, charging towards Grimm - with Whitey sailing comically by in the background! Nathan feints to the left, Grimm catching the ruse a split-second too late and catching a nasty spear to the ribs! Nathan grabs a fistful of rust-colored, wiry hair to haul Grimm up, but the Hangtown Horror shoves him backwards! Grimm steps up, crashing his forehead into Nathan’s!

Jerry Andrews: Dead Reckoning!

Ace Anderson: Aptly named - I Reckon Nathan wishes he were Dead right about now.

Grimm goes for the cover, but Ford breaks up the pin with a double axe handle blasting Grimm in the head! With Grimm reeling, Whitey reaches down to grab the bloodying Nathan, whipping him back down to the mat with a crashing suplex! Ford waits for Saniti to stand up and when he does, he leaps at him with a single leg dropkick! Nathan dodges it and Ford hits the mat! As he stands up, Grimm comes in with a flying leg lariat that sends Ford down and rolling towards the ropes!

Ace Anderson: This match is phenomenal, I still can’t figure out who’s gonna win!

Jerry Andrews: With THIS much action, I don’t know how anyone could decide!

Ford is back up now and he hits Nathan Saniti with a drop kick, pulling Nathan back up to connect with a snap suplex! Managing to climb to the top ropes, Ford leaps off of the ropes with a moonsault! No one is home as Nathan Saniti rolls out of the way, Ford wiping out and crashing into Grimm! All three men are down, but Whitey Ford is the first to get to his feet. Grimm follows, using the ropes to pull himself up on the apron. As Nathan Saniti gets to his feet, Grimm rushes him without warning!

Ace Anderson: I would have thought he’d go for Ford!

Jerry Andrews: You heard him - HE wants Ford. He’s just removing the competition…

Ace Anderson: Poor Nathan.

Nathan snaps his attention to Grimm, sidestepping the rush and grabbing him for a set up! Grimm locks up, managing a reversal! Whitey stands back, watching Grimm and Nathan struggle with each other.

Jerry Andrews: I don’t get it! Why isn’t Ford capitalizing on this??

Ace Anderson: Because he’s a slacker.

Jerry Andrews: I know you don’t like him, Ace, but really -

Ace Anderson: No, I mean he’s gonna let them do the work for him. Why should he waste more energy doing what they’re doing to themselves anyway?

Sure enough, the battle between Grimm and Saniti continues! Grimm grabs Nathan and sets him up, but Saniti breaks free, kicking Grimm in the stomach! As Grimm hunches forward, Nathan brings his forehead rocketing down towards Grimm’s - who is doing the exact same thing up towards Nathan’s face!

Ace Anderson: Oh my GOD, that NOISE!

Jerry Andrews: *horrified silence*

Grimm and Nathan had sent their skulls crashing towards each other, with the resulting sound of two melon covered rocks being smashed together, with an instant lights out for both! Ford bursts out laughing, clapping his hands and doing a little dance of glee. After all, he hadn’t broken any rules - they’d done it to themselves! Whitey pauses, circling around the fallen bodies, bending over to peer at this detail or that, poking and prodding them to lay directly next to each other. Whitey Ford nudges Nathan over, then shoves Grimm closer to the magician with his boot. The two superstars, lost in dreamland, never feel Ford draping himself over their bodies in a “draw me like one of your French girls” pose, imperiously gesturing for Lane to make the count!

...1!

…...2!

………..

…………..3!!!

Winner: Whitey “The Asshole” Ford via Pinfall

Bobaflex’s ”Bad Man,” plays out over the loudspeakers as the cameras show the announcers in a low corner, the rest of the feed swinging around the crowd!

Jerry Andrews: What an AMAZING show ladies and gentlemen, I’d like to thank you all for joining us tonight!

Ace Anderson: Remember to watch the Facebook page, twitter account, and the PCW fan forums for News & Rumors regarding PCW World Champion Dan Fierce and the recently-returned Eira!

Jerry Andrews: It’s been a crazy night, but I’m just wanting to get out of here. You know, beat the rush, avoid Seromine’s lackeys in the parking garage…

Ace Anderson: And I’m okay not considering any of this any further. What Seromine does to those followers is straight out of an angsty hipster’s interpretation of a Banksy.

Jerry Andrews: ….What?

Ace Anderson: That’s our cue to wrap this up. Goodnight to you, the PCW Faithful!

Jerry Andrews: Hey wait, you still didn’t explain the -

Ace Anderson: Say goodnight, Jerry.

Jerry Andrews: Goodnight, Jerry!

*CLICK*

---

*I was gonna go to bed, "The Asshole" Whitey Ford , I really was! But I was so close to done and the results were already so late…*