Post by Rick Majors on Feb 11, 2020 21:01:14 GMT -5
“Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.
Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”
-- Ephesians 4:31-32
Most religions preach forgiveness. Most cultures do as well. Believing that we can grow and change and become better people is such an important idea. Most people aren’t the same person they were at 10 when they turn 20, the same person they were at 20 when they turn 30, or the same person they were at 30 when they turn 40. We learn. We evolve. We take all of our experiences and our knowledge and that shapes us over the course of our lives. It changes us.
I’m certainly not the person I was at 20. In my 20s, I was brash and loud and confident. I thought I was the coolest person alive and the smartest person on earth. I believed I was invincible. That’s why I started my own wrestling company, that’s why I got into the ring despite having far less experience than everyone else around me, and that’s why I decided to do this for a living. That youthfull confidence gave me what I needed to begin my career, to begin my life.
That’s not who I am now. Between 28 and 48, people change. If you know someone in their 40s who still acts like they just got out of college, you know someone who is clearly having trouble. People change and that’s why the ability to forgive is so important. We're not the same now as we once were, so why should we be treated like we are? Forgiveness is a huge part of life.
And it’s something that is lost in our culture today. We no longer believe that people can change. We dig up things that people have said or done when they were basically children and hold it against them today. We take a comment that no one paid any attention to 10 or 20 years ago and act like it happened yesterday. There is no more forgiveness in this world. If you were a terrible person, or even if you said a terrible thing, you now carry that with you for life.
And that’s wrong.
I don’t want to be like that. I don’t want to hold bitterness and anger and judgment inside my soul. I don’t want to toss people aside because they made errors in the past. I am already alone as it is. I have lost friends and family members and nearly everyone I ever cared for. And many of those people left because of mistakes that I made.
I'm not going to sit here any longer and play the victim. The world wasn’t cruel to me for no reason. I was cruel to those who mattered. I ignored friends and left people behind as I moved up in the wrestling world. I didn’t try to keep in touch. I didn’t pick up the phone or send a text or fire off an email to an old friend I hadn’t spoken to in a while. I let my relationships die.
I was a terrible husband. I didn’t just ignore my wife, I treated her as if she wasn’t important. I always put myself first. I cared only about Rick Majors and what I wanted and where my career was taking me. I just thought she’d sit quietly in the background and come along for the ride. I was wrong. I was stupid.
I’d give anything to be forgiven by those I’ve wronged. I miss my friends. I miss my wife. I miss having people to share my life with. If one of them were to walk back into my life and tell me that they forgive me, it would mean the world to me. I would appreciate it so deeply.
“Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.”
-- Luke 6:37
Wouldn’t forgiving Jason Willard be the best way to show that he didn’t ruin me? He didn’t take my humanity. He didn’t take my individuality. He didn’t take my soul. I’m still here. I’m a strong and confident person once more, despite everything I’ve been through. Jason Willard didn’t damage me. He barely slowed me down.
Wouldn’t forgiving him be proof that his so-called “powers” were meaningless? Shouldn’t I walk into that ring, shake his hand, and focus on our opponents? Isn’t that the respectful thing to do? And I don’t just mean respectful to Jason but to Holden Ross and Grimm as well? This entire match shouldn’t be about holding a grudge. My entire life from this point on shouldn’t be tarnished by Jason Willard’s actions. We should all be able to move on from this. All should be forgiven. Jason Willard should be forgiven. That would be the right thing to. That would be the compassionate thing to do.
Fuck. Where am I going to get $100,000?