Post by Texas Tim on Nov 2, 2020 19:13:56 GMT -5
The scene opens on Texas Tim's ranch. He's out in the field standing next to a cow, as cowboys are apt to do. That's where the term "cowboy" comes from, don't cha know. It identifies the boy who is standing next to the cow. But Texas Tim is no boy. He's a man. A Texas-sized man. And tonight he's as full of wind as a corn-eating horse. Tim, that is. Not the cow. The cow remains a cow.
He starts to speak. Again, this refers to Tim. The cow doesn't speak. She doesn't even moo.
Howdy, y'all. Ya know this week we got ourselves a good ol' fashioned election. Down here in Texas, we love our elections. We wave our flags and shout our slogans and have a grand ol' time. Yessir, we love our country here in Texas. Patriots is what we are.
But this week it's a different type of election. And this one's crazy as a bullbat, I tell ya what. It ain't about country, no sir. It's about the number one contendership for the Genesis Title. And I want to win so bad I can taste it.
Ya see, I've had my opportunities to become number one contender before, and I messed up. But that won't happen this time. Nah, this time I'm ready. They'll be no slack in my rope this time. I’ll even wear my Sunday-go-to-meeting clothes cuz this is fixin' to be a celebration.
Ya know, that title's real purty. It would look great up on my mantle inside the ranch house. But I gotta go through Ol' Razor Blade to get a shot at it. That boy's big enough to bear hunt with a branch. Let me tell ya what, he's wide as two ax handles and all spread out like a cold supper. It's gonna be tough to beat him, that's for sure. But I'm gonna show up riding a gravy train with biscuit wheels. It's my time. The Lord will be on my side. The Great State of Texas will be on my side too. I can't lose!
It's time that ol' Texas Tim starts runnin' with the big dogs here in PCW. It doesn't matter what kinda dang match it'll be. I'm tough as nickel steak and ready and rarin’ to go, no matter if it's a cage match, a submission match, or a falls count anywhere match. That decision ain't up to me. It's up to the ol' Faithful and I fully trust them to make the right choice.
The time for jaw jackin' is over and the time to throw fists is here. And it ain't get no bigger or tougher than Texas.
Texas Forever.
The cow turns its head and looks like it's about to moo, but it decides against it. Texas Tim tips his hat and the scene fades to black.
He starts to speak. Again, this refers to Tim. The cow doesn't speak. She doesn't even moo.
Howdy, y'all. Ya know this week we got ourselves a good ol' fashioned election. Down here in Texas, we love our elections. We wave our flags and shout our slogans and have a grand ol' time. Yessir, we love our country here in Texas. Patriots is what we are.
But this week it's a different type of election. And this one's crazy as a bullbat, I tell ya what. It ain't about country, no sir. It's about the number one contendership for the Genesis Title. And I want to win so bad I can taste it.
Ya see, I've had my opportunities to become number one contender before, and I messed up. But that won't happen this time. Nah, this time I'm ready. They'll be no slack in my rope this time. I’ll even wear my Sunday-go-to-meeting clothes cuz this is fixin' to be a celebration.
Ya know, that title's real purty. It would look great up on my mantle inside the ranch house. But I gotta go through Ol' Razor Blade to get a shot at it. That boy's big enough to bear hunt with a branch. Let me tell ya what, he's wide as two ax handles and all spread out like a cold supper. It's gonna be tough to beat him, that's for sure. But I'm gonna show up riding a gravy train with biscuit wheels. It's my time. The Lord will be on my side. The Great State of Texas will be on my side too. I can't lose!
It's time that ol' Texas Tim starts runnin' with the big dogs here in PCW. It doesn't matter what kinda dang match it'll be. I'm tough as nickel steak and ready and rarin’ to go, no matter if it's a cage match, a submission match, or a falls count anywhere match. That decision ain't up to me. It's up to the ol' Faithful and I fully trust them to make the right choice.
The time for jaw jackin' is over and the time to throw fists is here. And it ain't get no bigger or tougher than Texas.
Texas Forever.
The cow turns its head and looks like it's about to moo, but it decides against it. Texas Tim tips his hat and the scene fades to black.
