Post by Texas Tim on Dec 3, 2020 16:31:48 GMT -5
Texas Tim is working out, but it's not at one of those fancy pants city slicker fitness centers. No sir, that ain't for him. This isn't even a gym. This is a real place where real people work out their real muscles. For real. It's a field full of hay and various pieces of lumber and tree stumps. Of course. That's how you work out in Texas. You do it on the land, like a true hardworking American.
Texas Tim drops a log down to the ground with a thud. He's sweating profusely so he mops his brow with a kerchief that he pulls from the back pocket of his blue jeans.
"Howdy folks," he says. He would tip how cowboy hat if he was wearing one. But he isn't. This obviously isn't the time for cowboy hat-wearing.
"As you can see, ol' Texas Tim is workin' hard, gettin' ready for the match with Rick Majors. This is a big opportunity for me. They say everything is bigger in Texas, and I'm in Texas, so you can imagine how big this opportunity looks to me. It looks big. Really big."
"But nah, I ain't nervous. My heart ain't all a flutter. I'm not all cut up like a boardinghouse pit. I'm as calm as a frog in the sun. Because I got confidence, yessir. Now, Mister Majors, he should be nervous. He should be so nervous that he has to thread his sewing machine while it’s running. Because I'm gonna take that there Genesis Title, I'll tell ya what."
He picks up an axe and starts swinging it, chopping a log as he does. He's really giving it to that log, just chopping it to hell and back. As he chops, he talks. He's in good enough shape to do that.
"Now Rick, I ain't got nuthin' against you. In fact, I respect you. We've known one another casually for quite some time. Off and on, from company to company, we've seen one another on these roads for years. And you were always the champion. You were always at the top of the card. You were always the one people talked about. I was down in the dirt, fightin' in the opening match, strugglin' to get a pay day. But I kept scratchin' and clawin'. I kept workin' hard. And now here I am. Fightin' for a title on dadgum pay-per-view. Woo wee! I'm for sure not gonna let this opportunity pass me by!"
"See you in the ring, Rick!"
Texas Tim continues to swing that axe, reducing the log to toothpicks before stopping to take a long drink of water.
Texas Tim drops a log down to the ground with a thud. He's sweating profusely so he mops his brow with a kerchief that he pulls from the back pocket of his blue jeans.
"Howdy folks," he says. He would tip how cowboy hat if he was wearing one. But he isn't. This obviously isn't the time for cowboy hat-wearing.
"As you can see, ol' Texas Tim is workin' hard, gettin' ready for the match with Rick Majors. This is a big opportunity for me. They say everything is bigger in Texas, and I'm in Texas, so you can imagine how big this opportunity looks to me. It looks big. Really big."
"But nah, I ain't nervous. My heart ain't all a flutter. I'm not all cut up like a boardinghouse pit. I'm as calm as a frog in the sun. Because I got confidence, yessir. Now, Mister Majors, he should be nervous. He should be so nervous that he has to thread his sewing machine while it’s running. Because I'm gonna take that there Genesis Title, I'll tell ya what."
He picks up an axe and starts swinging it, chopping a log as he does. He's really giving it to that log, just chopping it to hell and back. As he chops, he talks. He's in good enough shape to do that.
"Now Rick, I ain't got nuthin' against you. In fact, I respect you. We've known one another casually for quite some time. Off and on, from company to company, we've seen one another on these roads for years. And you were always the champion. You were always at the top of the card. You were always the one people talked about. I was down in the dirt, fightin' in the opening match, strugglin' to get a pay day. But I kept scratchin' and clawin'. I kept workin' hard. And now here I am. Fightin' for a title on dadgum pay-per-view. Woo wee! I'm for sure not gonna let this opportunity pass me by!"
"See you in the ring, Rick!"
Texas Tim continues to swing that axe, reducing the log to toothpicks before stopping to take a long drink of water.
