Post by Slither on Oct 23, 2005 4:27:22 GMT -5
A Voice booms from nowhere- Ladies and genital men, boys and girls, hell and even their dogs and cats. Here is you favorite world heavyweight champion of the WORRRRLD!!!!! SLITTTHHHHEERRRRRR!!!!!!
A single person applauding can be heard rather slowly. As Slither makes his way to a wooden chair sitting in the center of a spotlight, he is wearing his new Fear is for Jackasses t shirt. Taking a seat and flashing his trademark smirk.
Slither - Thank you, Thank you, too kind you all are, very kind.
He wipes a fake tear from his left cheek.
Slither – wow you guys are really the best. Umm well it’s time for me to lend everyone a few words of motivation to help you get through your day. Starting with…
He riches down and pulls up a pile of papers from the side of the chair. Turning the first card over it reads “Elitism”
Slither – even if it is lonely at the top I can still take comfort in looking down on everyone below me.
Tossing the paper over his shoulder he flips up the next one reading “Leaders”
Slither – Leaders are much like eagles, shame there aren’t any in PCW.
Tossing the page forward and flipping up another that reads “Ignorance”
Slither Chuckling – it’s amazing how everyone can work together, when no one knows what they are doing.
The next sign is “Defeat”
Slither - For every winner…
Points to himself
Slither - There are many losers ain’t that right boys.
“Humiliation” is next
Slither - Rocket nuff said, but I have never been one to shut my mouth at an appropriate time soooooo Mr. Hunter just remember the harder you try the dumber you look.
“Idiocy” he holds the page up right in front of his face.
Slither - Pegs and his little group of misfits are perfect for this one. After all you can never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. Oh and finally
He holds up the last card witch says “Ambition”
Slither - This goes out to whom ever wins the tourney, you can travel a thousand miles fight a million fights but when you meet me in the end for you it well end very badly. Choke on that slap nuts… wow Double J moment there, sorry about that.
He claps his hands turning the lights in the room on.
Slither – so how was that?
Brit can be seen sitting on the couch with a sweet smile on her face.
Brit- very bad. Where the hell did you get the idea to do a promo like that from?
Slither- an email I got. I thought it was funny. Sure it was funny why won’t you let me be funny.
Brit starts laughing hysterically at Slither’s temper tantrum.
Brit – Now that was funny.
Slither - but I wasn’t being funny I was serious.
Brit - sure you were… cute!
Slither - cute! You want to see cute. I’ll show you cute.
With that he walks over to the CD player pops in a CD flips a few tracks to find the right song. Picks up the remote and walks a few steps away and faces the wall.
Slither - are you ready?
Brit – No!
Slither - Too Bad!
With that he hits play on the remote and a guitar rift by the one and only Jimmy Hendrix can be heard.
Slither turns around and says - Foxy.
He takes a couple of steps forwards and again says – Foxy.
He lifts the remote to his mouth like a microphone and starts to sing along to the music.
Slither - Oh, you know you are a cute little heart breaker.
Thrusting his pelvis - Foxy, yeah.
Slither -And you know you are a sweet little love maker,
Again he thrusts his pelvis - Foxy.
Slither -I wanna take you home, yeah. I won't do you no harm no. You've got to be all mine, all mine. Ooh, foxy lady.
He starts to play some mean air guitar throwing in a foxy here and there.
Slither - Now-a, I see you, come down on the scene, oh foxy,*Screams* you make me wanna get up and a scream.
Slither lowers his voice - Foxy, oh baby listen now.
He drops to both knees
Slither - I've made up my mind, I'm tired of wasting all my precious time.
You've got to be all mine, all mine, Foxy Lady. I'm gonna take you home. *Screams* I won't do you no harm. You've got to be all mine, all mine.
Points to Brit - Foxy Lady. I’m Comin' and I’m ma get-cha.
Slither - Ooh, foxy lady, yeah. You look so good, Foxy. Oh yeah, foxy.
He gets up and straddles Brit
Slither - Yeah. Give us some, foxy. You make feel like a... very foxy... foxy... how was thats for cute
before she can answer he plants a big kiss on her lips as the feed fades out.
A single person applauding can be heard rather slowly. As Slither makes his way to a wooden chair sitting in the center of a spotlight, he is wearing his new Fear is for Jackasses t shirt. Taking a seat and flashing his trademark smirk.
Slither - Thank you, Thank you, too kind you all are, very kind.
He wipes a fake tear from his left cheek.
Slither – wow you guys are really the best. Umm well it’s time for me to lend everyone a few words of motivation to help you get through your day. Starting with…
He riches down and pulls up a pile of papers from the side of the chair. Turning the first card over it reads “Elitism”
Slither – even if it is lonely at the top I can still take comfort in looking down on everyone below me.
Tossing the paper over his shoulder he flips up the next one reading “Leaders”
Slither – Leaders are much like eagles, shame there aren’t any in PCW.
Tossing the page forward and flipping up another that reads “Ignorance”
Slither Chuckling – it’s amazing how everyone can work together, when no one knows what they are doing.
The next sign is “Defeat”
Slither - For every winner…
Points to himself
Slither - There are many losers ain’t that right boys.
“Humiliation” is next
Slither - Rocket nuff said, but I have never been one to shut my mouth at an appropriate time soooooo Mr. Hunter just remember the harder you try the dumber you look.
“Idiocy” he holds the page up right in front of his face.
Slither - Pegs and his little group of misfits are perfect for this one. After all you can never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. Oh and finally
He holds up the last card witch says “Ambition”
Slither - This goes out to whom ever wins the tourney, you can travel a thousand miles fight a million fights but when you meet me in the end for you it well end very badly. Choke on that slap nuts… wow Double J moment there, sorry about that.
He claps his hands turning the lights in the room on.
Slither – so how was that?
Brit can be seen sitting on the couch with a sweet smile on her face.
Brit- very bad. Where the hell did you get the idea to do a promo like that from?
Slither- an email I got. I thought it was funny. Sure it was funny why won’t you let me be funny.
Brit starts laughing hysterically at Slither’s temper tantrum.
Brit – Now that was funny.
Slither - but I wasn’t being funny I was serious.
Brit - sure you were… cute!
Slither - cute! You want to see cute. I’ll show you cute.
With that he walks over to the CD player pops in a CD flips a few tracks to find the right song. Picks up the remote and walks a few steps away and faces the wall.
Slither - are you ready?
Brit – No!
Slither - Too Bad!
With that he hits play on the remote and a guitar rift by the one and only Jimmy Hendrix can be heard.
Slither turns around and says - Foxy.
He takes a couple of steps forwards and again says – Foxy.
He lifts the remote to his mouth like a microphone and starts to sing along to the music.
Slither - Oh, you know you are a cute little heart breaker.
Thrusting his pelvis - Foxy, yeah.
Slither -And you know you are a sweet little love maker,
Again he thrusts his pelvis - Foxy.
Slither -I wanna take you home, yeah. I won't do you no harm no. You've got to be all mine, all mine. Ooh, foxy lady.
He starts to play some mean air guitar throwing in a foxy here and there.
Slither - Now-a, I see you, come down on the scene, oh foxy,*Screams* you make me wanna get up and a scream.
Slither lowers his voice - Foxy, oh baby listen now.
He drops to both knees
Slither - I've made up my mind, I'm tired of wasting all my precious time.
You've got to be all mine, all mine, Foxy Lady. I'm gonna take you home. *Screams* I won't do you no harm. You've got to be all mine, all mine.
Points to Brit - Foxy Lady. I’m Comin' and I’m ma get-cha.
Slither - Ooh, foxy lady, yeah. You look so good, Foxy. Oh yeah, foxy.
He gets up and straddles Brit
Slither - Yeah. Give us some, foxy. You make feel like a... very foxy... foxy... how was thats for cute
before she can answer he plants a big kiss on her lips as the feed fades out.
