Post by sexayjay on May 26, 2005 16:34:57 GMT -5
-(The house was dark, being the middle of the night. No one was up, and the only light that was on was a solitary kitchen light, which only lit underneath the microwave. Everything was silent…a fly buzzing through would’ve seemed like a million decibels loud.)-
-(Suddenly, though, the phone rang, and into one of the dark rooms the camera was at. With a flick of a switch, Jay was sitting up without a shirt on. Apparently, there were two women sleeping in the same bed, jumping up with him and holding onto him, groping his chest and caressing it with his hands. Quickly, he jabbed at the phone with his hand and picked it up.)-
“Ayo, who is this?”<br>
-(He sounded annoyed, above all things, blinking with enthusiasm as he rubbed his eyes. The ladies, the most gorgeous things ever, continued to sit there, stroking him as they kept their eyes on him.)-
“…No shit, man, fo’ real?”<br>
-(Suddenly, Jay began to fill up with excitement, nodding his head as he silently listened. The two ladies sat there still, looking at him with a puzzled look on their faces. He let out a little laugh as he continued to nod his head.)-
“…Great fucking news, man! Aight, yo, peace.”<br>
-(As he hung up the phone, he jumped out of bed, leaving the ladies’ arm’s in the air where he was. They turned to him, inquisitively smiling at him, trying to seduce him back to bed. But he was paying no attention, pulling up a pair of boxers onto himself and then a t-shirt. As he walked out, one of them shoved her hands in the air.)-
“Hey! What’s this all about!”<br>
-(Jay stopped at the doors and, sticking his finger in the air like he just remembered something he forgot, he quickly spun around and pointed at the two girls.)-
“Ayo, forgot about yas! Yeah, y’all gon’ have to get dressed and git!”<br>
-(Both of them simultaneously jumped out of the bed and stamped their feet towards him, standing in front of him in just skimpy night gowns and pointing their fingers at him, yelling.)-
“WHAT DO YOU MEAN ‘GET OUT’?! WE JUST GOT HERE!”<br>“WE HAVE NO CAR! HOW ARE WE GOING TO GET HOME!”<br>“ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS? I THOUGHT YOU WERE A MAN!”<br>“YOU SAID YOU LOVED ME, YOU BASTARD!”<br>
-(While all this was going on, Jay quietly stood there and kept his cool, not saying a word. As they finished, he raised a finger to his mouth, telling them to ‘Shhh’, and they did just that.)-
“Look, y’all gotta undahstand something…Jay gotta pay bills, and Jay gotta be on tha TV to pay ‘em…and how Jay gon’ get money to show you fine ladies a good time, huh?”<br>
-(He stood there with a “See my point?” look on his face, and the girls smiled and nodded, now hugging him. He put his arms around the both of them and kissed their heads, pushing them away as he walked out of the room.)-
“Jay, honey, when are we going to see you again?”<br>
“I’ll call you, sugar!”<br>
-(Jay turned and down the hall way. The whole thing was dark except for a light which was coming from one of the rooms in the end. As he turned into their, he saw Glock Fine and K-Muny, setting up a camera and a background, getting up a promo station ready.)-
“Man, you cats know how to do dis shit! How long you suckas been up?”<br>
“’Bout an hour.” Said Glock. “Figured we’d let you get a lil more sleep, y’aw know, get ready for a lil sumpin’-sumpin’.”<br>
-(The three of them smiled as they set up. Jay set up the scenery, K-Muny hooked up the equipment, and Glock Fine made sure all the camera stuff worked. Finally, everything was ready. Jay sat in his place, and Glock sat at the camera. Glock stuck a hand out, and put out five fingers.)-
“In 5…4…3…2…1…”
-(The light of their make-shift studio shone onto a Sexay Jay sitting their, striking a pose for the camera. He was silent for a moment, but then erupted into something.)-
“3 am. Suckas been calling me at 3 am. I been sayin’ fo’ years, a man can’t do SHIT at 3. Tonight, though, Imma prove all these things wrong. Imma say, ‘Shit, them Sexay fans gon’ hear the prediction, gon’ hear how it gon’ be.’”
-(Jay paused for dramatic effect, nodding his head.)-
“I been called, some bud of mine telling me I’m in TWO matches, facin’ TWO different suckas who could get the world title. Two? Puh-lease, man! Ain’t a thang! Imma break down these cats.”<br>
-(Jay pulls up a picture of “Maniac”, and holds it in front of him.)-
“This clown is Maniac. Hes crazy, hes insane, hes like every other mother fucker in the god damn wrestling world! He got ‘em problems, but Imma tell you ONE thing he don’t got, and that’s a muh-fuggin signature Sexay Crunch! Now, there is only ONE way he can get this, and that is by facin me, Sexay Jay, in tha ring, live, at revival. Imma make a prediction, right now, get yo’ pens out! Imma say, if this clown even MAKES it to the ring, he ain’t gon’ last 5 minutes. Shit, he gon’ be lucky to make it to three! Ha ha ha!”<br>
-(Jay laughs as he throws the picture to the side. Next, he pulls up a picture of “The Force”)-
“God damn, you Sexay fans think I’m facing the whole circus at revival, ain’t ya? Well, I ain’t, this here, The Force, is the last clown Imma be owning. He been a bouncer, he been a foo, he been a buncha shit.”<br>
-(Jay pauses to think for a moment, and then has a “Eureka!” look on his face.)-
“Oh shit, I remember this sucka! Think back, Sexays, ALL THE WAY BACK to Trauma 7…him and two other clowns faced my buds, Pegasus and Brass, much respect to ‘em. And, shit, I think that clown said he was gon’ make us look like hamburger or sumpin…and how did that match end, man? I think that was another notch in da win column fo your’s truly, Sexay Jay.”<br>
-(Jay picks up a picture of him made in Photoshop with the world title.)-
“And this here is tha final prediction. I walk out on top, covered in gold, sayin’ to myself ‘Shit, THAT was easy,’ and them suckas The Farce and Maniain’t gonna be sittin’ at they’s home, suckin’ their thumbs, sayin’ ‘Gee, why’d we even TRY to fuck with Jay?’ The answer is…shit man, I don’t even KNOW the answer. All I know is this: Last time I checked, it was Sexay Time, and Maniain’t and The Farce ain’t a thang! SEXAY OUT!”<br>
-(The camera fades to black with Jay holding the picture of himself winning the title.)-
-----([([([END FEDD])])])-----
-(Suddenly, though, the phone rang, and into one of the dark rooms the camera was at. With a flick of a switch, Jay was sitting up without a shirt on. Apparently, there were two women sleeping in the same bed, jumping up with him and holding onto him, groping his chest and caressing it with his hands. Quickly, he jabbed at the phone with his hand and picked it up.)-
“Ayo, who is this?”<br>
-(He sounded annoyed, above all things, blinking with enthusiasm as he rubbed his eyes. The ladies, the most gorgeous things ever, continued to sit there, stroking him as they kept their eyes on him.)-
“…No shit, man, fo’ real?”<br>
-(Suddenly, Jay began to fill up with excitement, nodding his head as he silently listened. The two ladies sat there still, looking at him with a puzzled look on their faces. He let out a little laugh as he continued to nod his head.)-
“…Great fucking news, man! Aight, yo, peace.”<br>
-(As he hung up the phone, he jumped out of bed, leaving the ladies’ arm’s in the air where he was. They turned to him, inquisitively smiling at him, trying to seduce him back to bed. But he was paying no attention, pulling up a pair of boxers onto himself and then a t-shirt. As he walked out, one of them shoved her hands in the air.)-
“Hey! What’s this all about!”<br>
-(Jay stopped at the doors and, sticking his finger in the air like he just remembered something he forgot, he quickly spun around and pointed at the two girls.)-
“Ayo, forgot about yas! Yeah, y’all gon’ have to get dressed and git!”<br>
-(Both of them simultaneously jumped out of the bed and stamped their feet towards him, standing in front of him in just skimpy night gowns and pointing their fingers at him, yelling.)-
“WHAT DO YOU MEAN ‘GET OUT’?! WE JUST GOT HERE!”<br>“WE HAVE NO CAR! HOW ARE WE GOING TO GET HOME!”<br>“ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS? I THOUGHT YOU WERE A MAN!”<br>“YOU SAID YOU LOVED ME, YOU BASTARD!”<br>
-(While all this was going on, Jay quietly stood there and kept his cool, not saying a word. As they finished, he raised a finger to his mouth, telling them to ‘Shhh’, and they did just that.)-
“Look, y’all gotta undahstand something…Jay gotta pay bills, and Jay gotta be on tha TV to pay ‘em…and how Jay gon’ get money to show you fine ladies a good time, huh?”<br>
-(He stood there with a “See my point?” look on his face, and the girls smiled and nodded, now hugging him. He put his arms around the both of them and kissed their heads, pushing them away as he walked out of the room.)-
“Jay, honey, when are we going to see you again?”<br>
“I’ll call you, sugar!”<br>
-(Jay turned and down the hall way. The whole thing was dark except for a light which was coming from one of the rooms in the end. As he turned into their, he saw Glock Fine and K-Muny, setting up a camera and a background, getting up a promo station ready.)-
“Man, you cats know how to do dis shit! How long you suckas been up?”<br>
“’Bout an hour.” Said Glock. “Figured we’d let you get a lil more sleep, y’aw know, get ready for a lil sumpin’-sumpin’.”<br>
-(The three of them smiled as they set up. Jay set up the scenery, K-Muny hooked up the equipment, and Glock Fine made sure all the camera stuff worked. Finally, everything was ready. Jay sat in his place, and Glock sat at the camera. Glock stuck a hand out, and put out five fingers.)-
“In 5…4…3…2…1…”
-(The light of their make-shift studio shone onto a Sexay Jay sitting their, striking a pose for the camera. He was silent for a moment, but then erupted into something.)-
“3 am. Suckas been calling me at 3 am. I been sayin’ fo’ years, a man can’t do SHIT at 3. Tonight, though, Imma prove all these things wrong. Imma say, ‘Shit, them Sexay fans gon’ hear the prediction, gon’ hear how it gon’ be.’”
-(Jay paused for dramatic effect, nodding his head.)-
“I been called, some bud of mine telling me I’m in TWO matches, facin’ TWO different suckas who could get the world title. Two? Puh-lease, man! Ain’t a thang! Imma break down these cats.”<br>
-(Jay pulls up a picture of “Maniac”, and holds it in front of him.)-
“This clown is Maniac. Hes crazy, hes insane, hes like every other mother fucker in the god damn wrestling world! He got ‘em problems, but Imma tell you ONE thing he don’t got, and that’s a muh-fuggin signature Sexay Crunch! Now, there is only ONE way he can get this, and that is by facin me, Sexay Jay, in tha ring, live, at revival. Imma make a prediction, right now, get yo’ pens out! Imma say, if this clown even MAKES it to the ring, he ain’t gon’ last 5 minutes. Shit, he gon’ be lucky to make it to three! Ha ha ha!”<br>
-(Jay laughs as he throws the picture to the side. Next, he pulls up a picture of “The Force”)-
“God damn, you Sexay fans think I’m facing the whole circus at revival, ain’t ya? Well, I ain’t, this here, The Force, is the last clown Imma be owning. He been a bouncer, he been a foo, he been a buncha shit.”<br>
-(Jay pauses to think for a moment, and then has a “Eureka!” look on his face.)-
“Oh shit, I remember this sucka! Think back, Sexays, ALL THE WAY BACK to Trauma 7…him and two other clowns faced my buds, Pegasus and Brass, much respect to ‘em. And, shit, I think that clown said he was gon’ make us look like hamburger or sumpin…and how did that match end, man? I think that was another notch in da win column fo your’s truly, Sexay Jay.”<br>
-(Jay picks up a picture of him made in Photoshop with the world title.)-
“And this here is tha final prediction. I walk out on top, covered in gold, sayin’ to myself ‘Shit, THAT was easy,’ and them suckas The Farce and Maniain’t gonna be sittin’ at they’s home, suckin’ their thumbs, sayin’ ‘Gee, why’d we even TRY to fuck with Jay?’ The answer is…shit man, I don’t even KNOW the answer. All I know is this: Last time I checked, it was Sexay Time, and Maniain’t and The Farce ain’t a thang! SEXAY OUT!”<br>
-(The camera fades to black with Jay holding the picture of himself winning the title.)-
-----([([([END FEDD])])])-----