Post by Deleted on Nov 9, 2006 21:19:09 GMT -5
-Tonight, a triple threat match takes place between AJ Styles, Robert Roode, and Ron Killings. Will the Great Khali interfere and establish his dominance in more than one promotion?
-Chris Sabin is slated to become a bad guy mere weeks after winning in his hometown. What does the Future hold for... The Future?
-Last week, yours truly Moon Prism struck down one of the dreaded turncoats. Will this week be just as effective?
If establishing wrestling reality is a spoon and the truth is a bowl of Cheerios, I believe tonight, no one will be hungry before bedtime. This is the KAF Report!
We're back once again with a second edition of the KAF Report this week, the fourth overall. We're going straight to the point here tonight, Heroes, as I will once again pursue the glorious omnipotence of Vince McMahon by hunting all his traitors down, in the second of sixty-something series called "Better Know a Brigader". Tonight's guest, introduce yourself, because I do not acknowledge remembering turncoats.
mikey_r- It's mikey_r. And... "turncoats"?
moonprism- Yes, the Benedict Arnold of today's wrestling scene, I know your game and don't even bother trying to hide it from me, Mikey underscore R. That's quite a name for a traitor. Tell me, why did you defect to the dark side?
mikey_r- The reason is simple. Vince McMahon isn't putting on anything good these last few months. No good entertainment, no good wrestling matches...and when he DOES get a great wrestler, they're either turned into crap or pushed down to jobber on Sunday Night Heat. I mean, look at Val Venis. The guy's been with the company since what, 1998? And he's been WHERE since like, 2003? Tell me, what was the last match you remember seeing Venis win?
moonprism- I'll tell you something, Mr. Underscore R... Sunday Night Heat is such a quality program that it's too good to even be on television. It's only broadcast over the internet, because the USA Network cannot handle that high of quality programming on Sunday night... The NFL would get too angry with their drop in ratings... And as for the last match that I've seen Val Venis win, I'd actually have to remember the last match in which he participated, Mr. R. All I know is what JR tells me; that Val Venis is a dangerous former Intercontinental champion, and as far as I'm concerned, he's a bigger expert than you are. At least he's not a traitor.
mikey_r- Oh, please. You expect me to believe that Kane vs. Johnny Parisi is too good a match to put on TV?! I like Kane, yeah, but if a match like THAT is believed to be good ratings, then Vince is more insane than I thought! And so what if Val's a former IC champion? That reign was all the way back in 1999! SEVEN years ago!
moonprism- Who are you to judge, Mr. R.? How many Intercontinental title reigns do you have, sir?
mikey_r- You're comparing an actual wrestler to a guy who just watches wrestling for entertainment. As far as "Who am I to judge", I'll go ahead with the rest of the world and say I could do a better job at writing RAW than the lunatics that think putting DX and a male stripper at the end of a show is a GREAT way to end a show, if not Bischoff's possible final appearance on television!
moonprism- I'm comparing an actual wrestler to someone who believes he could do better. Let's face it, Christopher DeJosephs is a ratings grabber. Just because you've turned your back on the greatest men in wrestling, Johnny Ace and Vince McMahon, don't take it out on me. We're gonna take our first caller... Who's there?
Ravensgurl211- Batman -- erm. Ravensgurl211.
moonprism- Don't try any of your tricks on me, Sir Dark Knight. What's your question for the Prism of Moon and Mr. R. this evening?
Ravensgurl211- Why does Heroes come on only once a week? Why not once a day? It would be easier for us all.
mikey_r- What's Heroes? Hogan's Heroes? I'm sure that comes on daily on TV Land or something...
moonprism- Don't be ridiculous, Mr. R. The greatest wrestler of all time does not have any heroes but himself.
mikey_r- That's what you say. The only heroes he has are painkillers and a plastic hip!
moonprism- That's inside information, sir, and we frown on that here on the Report. And if his hip is indeed plastic, that just makes it indestructable. You can't destroy it, you can only recycle it, which means it'll come back that much stronger if you try to damage it.
mikey_r- That's the most inane thing I've ever heard.
moonprism- Call me inane, call me insane, doesn't make a difference, just means the world's a better place with some of the truthiness of the one known as Moon Prism. Next caller, identify yourself for the traitor and the humble servant of the WRESTLING GAWHD!
mikey_r- You're Jibble's butler?
moonprism- I'm awaiting my position in command. If the DOA, the APA, the TAPA, and T&A end up disappearing, I will be his right-hand man.
pfrsccmore- pfrsccmore from GA.
moonprism- Have no idea where GA is, but it sounds like a wonderful place... If you like places that sound like noises infants make. What's your question for the panel tonight?
pfrsccmore- Should Piper be sued for wearing speedos on TV?
mikey_r- I say any guy, ANY guy, be it straight, Heart Throbs, or even those swimming competitors, ANY man should be sued for wearing a Speedo!
moonprism- Correct me if I'm wrong, but don't most of the wrestlers wear Speedos? Are you saying the Rock and Stone Cold should be sued as well? How dare you disgrace the legacy of the Great One and the Rattlesnake. You're on notice, pal.
mikey_r- Me and the rest of the IWC, pal. But if you can see a guy's wedgie, there's something wrong there.
moonprism- Wedgies are a fact of life, my friend, and your potent fear of the junior high version of the atomic death drop only proves that you were a Melvin boy yourself, weren't you?
mikey_r- A wha? No, you know what, don't answer that, just get the next caller in here before I get a headache.
moonprism- The truth hurts, my IWC fellow. Don't blame me for the sad facts of life creeping up on you like a case of crabs. Next caller, who's turn is it to humiliate the guest?
domluver- Mine!
moonprism- Who is mine? I don't know a Mine.
mikey_r- ::eyeroll::
moonprism- Watch it, or you'll be dead to me before you know it.
domluver- It tis me, the John Cena mark of the comm, but tonight it's the AJ mark of the community. As you know AJ Styles has to be the hawtest wrestler in TNA history. What's your opinion about that? And when do you think he's going to the be the next champion?
mikey_r- Well, Styles has a nice physique, I'll say that. As for when he's gonna be the next NWA champion, who knows? At this point, I'm starting to feel like TNA needs to get a second show, or even a secondary title. I mean, you have all these guys lined up and/or promised the World title in the future. What are they gonna do before that even happens? They'll have to have a belt to help show they're on their way to the top, and the X title isn't gonna cut it for everyone. Some, but not all.
moonprism- Mr. R., if there already is a secondary title, why are you asking for another one?
mikey_r- The X title's NOT a secondary title! It may look like it with Joe, or Styles, or even Daniels, but that's it. They're exceptions, not the rule! If TNA can get an, I dunno, International title or something, fine. But to be Abyss and ask week after week, "when am I finally getting that World title shot?", that's just sad! A guy like him needs a belt to wear until Jarrett finally up and leaves for good!
moonprism- So what you're saying is they need an Intercontinental championship, which would in turn once again reprive the glory of Vincent Kennedy McMahon and his ideas to vault superstars who are on their way to becoming the world champion. AJ Styles as the Intercontinental champion of the ones trying to put Vince, Johnny Ace, Chris Masters, Great Khali, Mitch from the Spirit Squad, Viscera, and the rest of the great stars of WWE on the streets, and all because you think it would benefit the enemy.
mikey_r- ...Actually, yes. That makes perfect sense. Except for the "reprive the glory of Vince" part, whatever that means.
moonprism- It means that for not being smart enough to hail our fearless leader, you've dropped down to the point that you think TNA doing something great would be a beneficial idea to the wrestling world. Well, kind sir, when Vince and I are on the cruise ship together, and you're floating in the ocean behind us with the rest of this so-called Total Nonstop Action, don't expect me to shed a tear. It's just not my style. That does it for the Report, and who knows... if enough of you want to be on the show, we may see you again sooner than you think! Goodnight, Heroes.
-Chris Sabin is slated to become a bad guy mere weeks after winning in his hometown. What does the Future hold for... The Future?
-Last week, yours truly Moon Prism struck down one of the dreaded turncoats. Will this week be just as effective?
If establishing wrestling reality is a spoon and the truth is a bowl of Cheerios, I believe tonight, no one will be hungry before bedtime. This is the KAF Report!
We're back once again with a second edition of the KAF Report this week, the fourth overall. We're going straight to the point here tonight, Heroes, as I will once again pursue the glorious omnipotence of Vince McMahon by hunting all his traitors down, in the second of sixty-something series called "Better Know a Brigader". Tonight's guest, introduce yourself, because I do not acknowledge remembering turncoats.
mikey_r- It's mikey_r. And... "turncoats"?
moonprism- Yes, the Benedict Arnold of today's wrestling scene, I know your game and don't even bother trying to hide it from me, Mikey underscore R. That's quite a name for a traitor. Tell me, why did you defect to the dark side?
mikey_r- The reason is simple. Vince McMahon isn't putting on anything good these last few months. No good entertainment, no good wrestling matches...and when he DOES get a great wrestler, they're either turned into crap or pushed down to jobber on Sunday Night Heat. I mean, look at Val Venis. The guy's been with the company since what, 1998? And he's been WHERE since like, 2003? Tell me, what was the last match you remember seeing Venis win?
moonprism- I'll tell you something, Mr. Underscore R... Sunday Night Heat is such a quality program that it's too good to even be on television. It's only broadcast over the internet, because the USA Network cannot handle that high of quality programming on Sunday night... The NFL would get too angry with their drop in ratings... And as for the last match that I've seen Val Venis win, I'd actually have to remember the last match in which he participated, Mr. R. All I know is what JR tells me; that Val Venis is a dangerous former Intercontinental champion, and as far as I'm concerned, he's a bigger expert than you are. At least he's not a traitor.
mikey_r- Oh, please. You expect me to believe that Kane vs. Johnny Parisi is too good a match to put on TV?! I like Kane, yeah, but if a match like THAT is believed to be good ratings, then Vince is more insane than I thought! And so what if Val's a former IC champion? That reign was all the way back in 1999! SEVEN years ago!
moonprism- Who are you to judge, Mr. R.? How many Intercontinental title reigns do you have, sir?
mikey_r- You're comparing an actual wrestler to a guy who just watches wrestling for entertainment. As far as "Who am I to judge", I'll go ahead with the rest of the world and say I could do a better job at writing RAW than the lunatics that think putting DX and a male stripper at the end of a show is a GREAT way to end a show, if not Bischoff's possible final appearance on television!
moonprism- I'm comparing an actual wrestler to someone who believes he could do better. Let's face it, Christopher DeJosephs is a ratings grabber. Just because you've turned your back on the greatest men in wrestling, Johnny Ace and Vince McMahon, don't take it out on me. We're gonna take our first caller... Who's there?
Ravensgurl211- Batman -- erm. Ravensgurl211.
moonprism- Don't try any of your tricks on me, Sir Dark Knight. What's your question for the Prism of Moon and Mr. R. this evening?
Ravensgurl211- Why does Heroes come on only once a week? Why not once a day? It would be easier for us all.
mikey_r- What's Heroes? Hogan's Heroes? I'm sure that comes on daily on TV Land or something...
moonprism- Don't be ridiculous, Mr. R. The greatest wrestler of all time does not have any heroes but himself.
mikey_r- That's what you say. The only heroes he has are painkillers and a plastic hip!
moonprism- That's inside information, sir, and we frown on that here on the Report. And if his hip is indeed plastic, that just makes it indestructable. You can't destroy it, you can only recycle it, which means it'll come back that much stronger if you try to damage it.
mikey_r- That's the most inane thing I've ever heard.
moonprism- Call me inane, call me insane, doesn't make a difference, just means the world's a better place with some of the truthiness of the one known as Moon Prism. Next caller, identify yourself for the traitor and the humble servant of the WRESTLING GAWHD!
mikey_r- You're Jibble's butler?
moonprism- I'm awaiting my position in command. If the DOA, the APA, the TAPA, and T&A end up disappearing, I will be his right-hand man.
pfrsccmore- pfrsccmore from GA.
moonprism- Have no idea where GA is, but it sounds like a wonderful place... If you like places that sound like noises infants make. What's your question for the panel tonight?
pfrsccmore- Should Piper be sued for wearing speedos on TV?
mikey_r- I say any guy, ANY guy, be it straight, Heart Throbs, or even those swimming competitors, ANY man should be sued for wearing a Speedo!
moonprism- Correct me if I'm wrong, but don't most of the wrestlers wear Speedos? Are you saying the Rock and Stone Cold should be sued as well? How dare you disgrace the legacy of the Great One and the Rattlesnake. You're on notice, pal.
mikey_r- Me and the rest of the IWC, pal. But if you can see a guy's wedgie, there's something wrong there.
moonprism- Wedgies are a fact of life, my friend, and your potent fear of the junior high version of the atomic death drop only proves that you were a Melvin boy yourself, weren't you?
mikey_r- A wha? No, you know what, don't answer that, just get the next caller in here before I get a headache.
moonprism- The truth hurts, my IWC fellow. Don't blame me for the sad facts of life creeping up on you like a case of crabs. Next caller, who's turn is it to humiliate the guest?
domluver- Mine!
moonprism- Who is mine? I don't know a Mine.
mikey_r- ::eyeroll::
moonprism- Watch it, or you'll be dead to me before you know it.
domluver- It tis me, the John Cena mark of the comm, but tonight it's the AJ mark of the community. As you know AJ Styles has to be the hawtest wrestler in TNA history. What's your opinion about that? And when do you think he's going to the be the next champion?
mikey_r- Well, Styles has a nice physique, I'll say that. As for when he's gonna be the next NWA champion, who knows? At this point, I'm starting to feel like TNA needs to get a second show, or even a secondary title. I mean, you have all these guys lined up and/or promised the World title in the future. What are they gonna do before that even happens? They'll have to have a belt to help show they're on their way to the top, and the X title isn't gonna cut it for everyone. Some, but not all.
moonprism- Mr. R., if there already is a secondary title, why are you asking for another one?
mikey_r- The X title's NOT a secondary title! It may look like it with Joe, or Styles, or even Daniels, but that's it. They're exceptions, not the rule! If TNA can get an, I dunno, International title or something, fine. But to be Abyss and ask week after week, "when am I finally getting that World title shot?", that's just sad! A guy like him needs a belt to wear until Jarrett finally up and leaves for good!
moonprism- So what you're saying is they need an Intercontinental championship, which would in turn once again reprive the glory of Vincent Kennedy McMahon and his ideas to vault superstars who are on their way to becoming the world champion. AJ Styles as the Intercontinental champion of the ones trying to put Vince, Johnny Ace, Chris Masters, Great Khali, Mitch from the Spirit Squad, Viscera, and the rest of the great stars of WWE on the streets, and all because you think it would benefit the enemy.
mikey_r- ...Actually, yes. That makes perfect sense. Except for the "reprive the glory of Vince" part, whatever that means.
moonprism- It means that for not being smart enough to hail our fearless leader, you've dropped down to the point that you think TNA doing something great would be a beneficial idea to the wrestling world. Well, kind sir, when Vince and I are on the cruise ship together, and you're floating in the ocean behind us with the rest of this so-called Total Nonstop Action, don't expect me to shed a tear. It's just not my style. That does it for the Report, and who knows... if enough of you want to be on the show, we may see you again sooner than you think! Goodnight, Heroes.
