Post by Lantlas on Apr 7, 2006 0:01:30 GMT -5
Wandering around the darkness of night, searching for the possible location of one Kieran Evenstar. The dark elf, the one who has taken control of the mind of Devon Drake and already caused a trail of destruction. The night is where she'd be found, it's where she lurked. In the cover of night, much like a ninja, no one would be safe from her wrath. Her desire to harm those weaker than her was one not to be challenged. It would be dangerous for a human to even look her in the eye, for her evil could interpret the most innocent of curious minds for an attacker, and that poor soul would never be heard from again. Dr. Virgill might have crossed the line, and it was time to find Kieran before other victims emerged.
I was in unfamiliar territory. Since moving to Charleston, the extent of my travels had led me to and from the Elven Path outside of town, and not much else. I wasn't much of a social butterfly, so the need for me to be anywhere else wasn't there. Instead of heading south, I was heading northwest. Don't ask me why, but it was just the feeling inside of me, almost as if something inside of me was a guiding force.
A helm at the end of my sight, lit by an unknown source, lay before me less than a mile ahead. No matter how fast I seemed to run, I felt like I was moving in slow motion. The end of this little run couldn't seem to get there fast enough, nor did the little speck of light seem to get any closer. A few trees began to appear to the side of me, so I slowed to a walk, as not to trip over an upraised root. Fending away a few branches, I felt my boots collide with rock. No more soil covered the surface on which I was standing, but it was too dark to idenitify exactly where it was. The light seemed like it hadn't gotten any closer, and I quickly felt frustrated. I walked across the rocky ground, and I started to feel an incline. Looking around, I could feel the cool breeze hitting me in the face. Weird, since it wasn't even that cold out when I left. Suddenly, my whole body was shivering. Something wasn't right about this, being that it's the middle of April and we're in South Carolina.
I took another step forward, and almost slipped. Only about half of my foot connected with rock, and the rest with only air. I tore my pants on the jagged edge, and I pulled myself back up. I looked around, and noticed the light I'd been following was gone. Perfect, I've been lead on a chase of nothing. This day couldn't get any better if I planned it. I gazed around one more time, trying to get some sense of what I'd gotten myself into. Despite the fact that I couldn't see anything, I felt like I was in familiar territory. A rocky cliff, there was only one place, one time I'd ever been standing on a cliff, and that was... No, not gonna think about that. I've sworn to strictly keep that off my mind.
My inner thoughts were interrupted by the sound of muffled cries. A sadness inside of me, a feeling of empathy perhaps, overtook my train of thought and I sought out the source of these sounds. Being careful not to slip on the edge, I followed the sound until I could vaguely see the shape of a human. Standing dangerously close to the edge of this cliff, hands burying her face. She must've heard me coming, cause the sounds stopped and were replaced by a startled gasp. "Don't come any closer," she warned.
I stopped dead in my tracks. A voice, one of purity and hope, so beautiful in its sound. What would lead one with the voice of an angel to be crying tears of such pain? "I'm not here to hurt you," I replied.
"You can't possibly hurt me any more than I already have been," came a cold and chilling response. Wow, she sounded an awful lot like... me. I remember feeling that way, a long time ago, but once again... can't get into that now. Situation is at hand, must focus on that. "Don't try to stop me, there is no other end to this."
No no, not another one of these. I had enough experience dealing with those on the verge of ending their lives. Very cautiously, I moved a bit closer. She didn't freak, so I moved a bit closer again. Finally, I was close enough to touch her, and I softly grabbed her shoulder. She flinched and turned towards me to swat it away, and she slipped. Without hesitating, I grabbed her hand before she could fall over the edge, and I pulled her back over to safety. Her heavy breaths of petrified sorrow panted in between trying to let just another tear out of her dried eyes. "You should've let me go," she whispered. "I can't live with this pain."
"Listen, I know you don't know me and I don't know you," I explained, "but there is so much to life you've yet to discover. I can tell by your voice and the softness of your skin that you can't be any older than I am. Things change, whatever is causing you this pain will soon be replaced by a source of joy, of comfort, of satisfaction. Things aren't always so dark, you must believe me." Not believing those words were coming out of my mouth, my heartbeat increased in the silence that followed my little speech. Her breathing was slowing back to normal, and the tears had stopped flowing.
"You're absolutely right," she responded after a few minutes. "I can't believe I almost did that. To think that one boy was worth dying without, what must've come over me?"
"Trust me, my heart has been thrashed enough times to understand the place from which you're coming. It's not an easy thing, the loss of love. In these times, ones of tribulation and soul-crashing, you truly begin to wonder if this 'love', this fairy-tale, this idea really does exist, or if it's something made up to give us hope for the future. Something to live for if you don't have a God, maybe. The future seems bleak, the chances seem great that you'll end up spending the rest of your life in solitude, for you can't imagine going anywhere without this person that became such a part of your life, so you'd rather end it than find out what it feels like to spend the rest of eternity alone."
Again, her silence in response made me nervous. It made me wonder if I was doing more damage than good, and I started to panic inside. There are times where I should just keep my mouth shut. Getting involved in situations never seems to end well, so why did I do it yet again? "Have I offended you?" I ask. "If so, I'll leave you alone."
I felt the touch of her hand against mine, and it lightly pulled me towards her, so I guess she didn't want me to leave. "What is your name," I heard her soft voice ask. Name, this could be where things change. It's not like I was the President, but I was pretty well known in the area because of my recent success in PCW. In the darkness, there's no way she could've identified me via the long blue hair. I didn't speak a lot in public, so the chances of her identifying me through my voice were unlikely. What the hell, where did lying ever get me?
"Anduril. Lantlas Anduril."
"Lantlas, the Elven Warrior 'Lantlas'?" Fuck, I should've kept my mouth shut. What was I thinking in telling her who I really was. I started to get up, but she tugged me back. "Where are you going?"
"I'm sorry," I replied, "I thought you wouldn't know who I was."
"How could I not? I'm an independent wrestler from the northeast. Everyone's heard the story of the recruit from Germany who turned into a world champion!" I was appalled... I never thought I'd see the day when independent wrestlers were hearing the success story of me.
"A wrestler, you are. And a female one at that! That's a rarity these days."
"When I came over from Japan, I didn't expect to have much success. When I learned of others coming in from other countires and eventually becoming world champions, I couldn't help but be inspired. I never thought I'd actually get to meet you though. I've been watching you recently, and I actually came down to see this show for that reason." Wow, I had a fan. I guess the cheers I'd been hearing when my music hit recently weren't just a figment of my imagination. "Hey, look... now that you've got me feeling better about that loser Chris, I think I'm gonna head back to my hotel and have a glass of wine."
"Would you like me to join you?"
"Not this time, but I'm sure you'll see me again." She started to walk off, but I had to at least know who it was.
"Wait a second!"
I heard the footsteps stop. "Yes?"
"Can I have your name?"
There wasn't an immediate response. I guess she liked to take in the moment before she spoke. "I go by 'Schizoid Neko'. That's the name I wrestle under. See you later!" Before I could respond, I heard her pace quicken into a run, and within a few seconds, I knew she was gone. I felt really good, and for a good while, I'd almost forgotten why I was even looking around the unknown. Something else was preoccupying my mind now... a hunch, a feeling, a sheer shread of morbid curiousity that just wouldn't go away.
"Schizoid Neko," I repeated out loud, "why does that sound so damn familiar?" I picked up my cell phone and dialed a number of the one who knew more wrestlers than most big-time promoters.
"Al Laiman," I heard the phone pick up.
"Al... Hey, it's Lantlas."
"What can I do for you?"
"I ran into an independent wrestler this evening, and I was wondering if you'd ever heard of her."
"What's the name?"
"Schizoid Neko."
There was a long pause on the other end. Either he was trying to remember, or I'd struck a serious nerve. Finally, I heard a breath return to the phone... "Listen, you Elven asshole, you've got some fucking nerve calling me with a question like that. I don't know if this is your idea of a joke, but if it is, you can go fuck yourself." I heard the phone click, and I tried to grasp exactly what had happened there. There was apparently more to this than I realized. As I started to head back towards the city, I heard another voice. One that sounded much older than the previous one I'd heard.
"Proceed with caution, my Elven friend." Interesting, it certainly wasn't my Elven side, and the voice sounded way too quiet and raspy to be either Devon or Kieran.
"Who is that?"
"It matters not. I come to you with an explanation of what you have seen and what lies before you." The light I'd seen earlier reappeared, but this time it was right in front of me. A small aura illuminated what appeared to be a very elderly woman. It couldn't have been the same one Neovan was speaking of a few weeks ago... could it?
"You have discovered a new feature of your mind, have you not?"
"Yes."
"And what was this?"
"Before something bad happened, my mind imagined it happening... well, not exactly how it did, but along the same lines. Instead of being in a hotel, I was in my locker room. Small detail differences, but you get the overall idea."
All of the sudden, I saw a glow coming from her. Her eyes became two beams of bright green light. Oh shit, what have I gotten myself into here? "You have learned, but you have not figured out that it will happen more than once... or that it may have happened before."
"What do you mean?"
"When I touched you, when I saw your future, I saw conflict. I saw those that mattered to you leaning on the balance of good and evil. But what I saw above anything was your gift's mind of cautional foresight. It lay unbeknownst to you at the time, but before I could tell you, I'm afraid I passed away."
It was her! Clanstine, Neovan had said the woman's name was! "How are you even talking to me now if you're dead?"
"The soul never dies, my child. I was only able to speak with you through a vessel, and since she has been transmitted with all the information I have for you, I can now leave. Just remember... your mind has cautioned you before!"
There was a great flash of light, and then a burst of air. I fell to the ground from the force, and then I looked over to where she was, and I saw Devon. She looked back at me, and her eyes were glowing green. I guess Kieran had come out to play once again.
"Kieran, what did you do with Dr. Virgill?"
A sick smile crossed her face. "I did nothing to the good doctor. Silly Lantlas, if I were to kill anyone, it wouldn't be that poor man."
"Then what happened?"
"Oh, like you don't know... You going back into time to save that stupid human woman caused it. You knew that fate had to be balanced somewhere, and that it would affect you somehow... You thought too small. Just because you didn't know him doesn't mean it didn't affect you, aye smart one?"
"How do you know all this?"
"I know many things about you, Lantlas. Through speaking with the soul of this Clanstine, I have learned that things are not what you believe them to be."
"Oh really," I responded sarcastically, "is this another test? Another mission to discover what my life would be like if I tweaked something?" Before I knew it, I felt a hand crash across my face. An Elven hand, one with mighty force. It knocked me down to my back with almost no effort. Before I could react, she was standing over me, seriously reminding me of my Elven side.
"Think, if you can... Didn't tonight's little rendez-vous with the Schizoid Neko seem a little... familiar?"
"Yes."
"That's because it should, you idiot!"
"What do you mean?"
She sounded angry, and sighed in deeply. As the sun was beginning to rise, I could see the frustration of impatience on her face. "Look to your right, and tell me what you see."
Although lying down from my side, I turned my head and saw the sun rising over the ocean. I looked at the ground I was laying on, and it all began to sink in. "I'm at the cliff where I met..."
"No, you're at the cliff where you were GOING to meet her!"
"Going to meet her?"
"Lantlas, think back about Dr. Virgill. Wasn't there a slight difference in the situation when you actually found out as opposed to when your mind tried to warn you?"
"Yes, it was in a hotel instead of my own locker room."
"And didn't some things seem to not add up?"
"Yes, like how the cop could find me at a hotel when I didn't check in with my real name or tell anyone where I was going."
"What I want you to do now is to think back on the bitter memories you've tried to supress. Not the ones of the child, those were indeed real. The ones you've found yourself unable to let go of, I want you to search for the inconsistencies."
I see her, my red-headed princess. Her head peeks in the door, those green eyes darting around, searching for something. They come in contact with me, and for a split second, the returned glance is locked. Everything I thought I'd put behind me comes rushing back to the pit of my stomach once again. Her head disappears from the door, and I go after her. I step outside, the road is icy. I see her walking far ahead of me, and foolishly I move as fast as I can to catch up with her. I finally get within reaching distance, how I long to touch her just one more time. Suddenly, the ice under my feet catches up with me, and I crash to the ground as I see her feet take off, running away from me yet again.
"There's no way she would've been able to run on ice, and it was June when it happened."
I'm driving through a snowstorm. It's back in Pennsylvania where we grew up. The hills are treacherous as the snow just keeps piling up on the unplowed roads. I can barely shift into second gear without sliding and almost spinning out of control. I start going down a steep hill, and I almost spin out. The guard rail comes so close to my passenger door that I could probably reach out and touch it.
I stop, breathing in heavily. "I can't let this stop me", I assure myself. "I've got to see her."
The girl means everything to me, and if it takes driving through the blizzard of hell to get to her, I won't hesitate to do so. I'd already given up most of my life and almost my career for her, what else do I have to lose?
I see a pair of headlights in the distance. Because the snow has completely covered the lines in the road, it's time to play safe instead of legal. I'm only going fifteen miles an hour, and I play it very carefully as the two beams of light get closer. I hear a screeching noise, and I see the car spin, the headlights coming closer... closer... CLOSER....
"We didn't grow up in Pennsylvania, and I've never had a driver's license."
Make your future, don't regret your past. Write the Elvish Tale, don't re-live it.
I hear her voice interrupting the flashback to my memories. "Are you starting to get it?"
"I see there's inconsistencies in my memories, but what does this mean?"
"It means that they're not memories, Lantlas!" Not memories? Then they were... forewarnings? "Think back to the time you met her!"
"It was on the edge of this cliff, and it was at sunset, not sunrise, but she was contemplating ending her life over the loss of some guy named Chris."
"Yes, and Chris would be the one she will eventually leave you for if you continue on this path! The one you find through the rainy window, the one who tore your heart in two!"
"So this whole time, I thought my soul had been destroyed, but it was all my mind warning me of things to come?" This couldn't be. I stood up before Kieran could react, and I took off running. There were facts I needed to check, especially why Laiman reacted the way he did to such an innocent question. I heard her voice in the distance as I was running away... "Proceed with caution, Lantlas!"
In what seemed like no time at all, I got back to my locker room. I found my computer and clicked on a web address that hadn't been accessed in awhile, the HHW website. I clicked on "past results", and did a search on "Schizoid Neko." Several hits over the course of the first few months of 2005, the time after Drake had turned on me and I had reverted back to my Elven self. I clicked on "Mayhem 2005 results", and scrolled down.
Backstage, Geno is with Blake Smith.
BLAKE: I’m here with Geno, and I have to ask, what are your thoughts going into this contest against your longtime friend?
GENO: I’m ready for it, and… What the hell?
The camera turns to see a mob of people beating the hell out of someone. There‘s a few unidentified men, and a shorter figure in the front is…
BLAKE: Is that the Schizoid Neko? Who are they attacking?
GENO: I don’t know.
Glass shattering is heard, and Neko hi-fives the unknown men.. Laughter is heard as they walk away from someone lying unconscious on the ground. Geno and Blake walk over, and they realize exactly who it is.
GENO: Al?
BLAKE: Call the medics!
The camera goes back to the announcers in the arena.
TAZZ: Um, what the hell just happened?
ZBYSZKO: Why did Schizoid Neko orchestrate this attack against Al Laiman? Why Neko?
TAZZ: I don’t know, but Al appears to be hurt pretty bad. When we have an update, we’ll let you know.
I couldn't believe it, she had made this common betrayal a habit, and I couldn't even remember it! I kept scrolling...
Neo sets Steele up… FOLEY IS GOOD! At the same time, Lantlas drops Neko with the Elvish Tale, and they both go for the pinfall at the same time. 1...2...3!
TAZZ: Uh…
ZBYSZKO: What’s going on here? A member of each team has been pinned.
Neo and Lantlas get up and look at each other.
RING ANNOUNCING RALFUS: Here are your winners… Neo Anderson and Lantlas?
Neo and Lantlas shrug and shake hands. The ref hands them each a tag team title belt.
TAZZ: Our new tag team champions are Neo Anderson and Lantlas, apparently!
My partnership with Neo had begun, and Neo Anderson had been teaming with her... SHE was the one who was the second part of "Cake or Death" with Neo Anderson? How could I not have remembered this?
As he raises it in the air, Neo suddenly falls to the ground as a kendo stick is broken over his back. His former tag team partner, Neko, stands with blood coming from her mouth. She raises the broken end of the stick in the air, and suddenly a huge cheer comes up from the crowd. Al Laiman, bruised and battered, is limping to the ringside melee. Neko smiles, and as Al lunges out with a right hand, Neko cracks him in the side of the head with the broken end of the kendo stick. She grabs him by the head and drops him with the Cat’s Meow! Al is knocked out cold on the floor as Neko is the last one standing.
Finally, I had to be sure. I returned to the search page for "Schizoid Neko" and searched for her profile. I clicked on the "wrestler profile" hit, and saw under real name...
...
"SONADA, TERRY L."
...
I sat there in disbelief. I couldn't quite comprehend the severity of the delusion I'd uncovered. Everything... Otakon, her agreeing to let me name our first daughter, finding her with another guy in the rain... It hadn't happened yet? It was all in my head! I wasn't sure which to feel worse about. The fact that it didn't happen should be making me feel better... but it wasn't. I still had the empty, void feeling inside my stomach that no matter which turn fate took me around next, I would never be anything but alone.