Post by Dollface on Aug 11, 2014 21:51:39 GMT -5
Yeah, candy. So what? It's kind of how I relate to things, or has really no one caught on to that yet?
Oh wait, that's it. Cliché. I'm a cliché, a caricature of myself, because god for-fucking-bid someone use a gimmick with any degree of consistency, right? We must constantly be changing, presenting new, different, and exciting performances for everyone to be in awe of. Marveling at our artistry and creativity.
I can't.
I don't have it.
There's nothing HERE!
There should be right now, but there isn't. They changed my pills I think. I can't remember. Iska was getting too loud, always hurting me again, so they gave me something to "take the edge off". It took the edge off my ability to feel anything. To WANT to feel anything. To even care whether I feel anything ever again. Iska told them to. I know she did.
Now nothing makes sense. I'm making stupid mistakes, I can't think, I can't focus.
I can't give a single iota of fuck.
Nathan. Pretty awesome guy, and I'm letting him down. We have things to see, people to do - wait, scratch that, reverse it! So much going on and I can't get out of this gray mire my brain has been sunk into. I was really happy with him, things were going somewhere, and now I can't seem to see my way out of wherever it is I'm stuck.
Andy D. He got most loved. I really wanted it, and I thought the crowd still loved me, but apparently not. I'm not the prettiest in the land anymore, and that actually really meant something to me. So you know... thanks, guys. Thanks for taking that one thing away.
Derek Cosmos. I don't even know what to say. You have a nice smile, and you're really good at remembering to introduce yourself by your full name. We're gonna go and do wrestle-y stuff, but Andy D. might kick your ass for being so suffocating and creepy. No means no, you do realize that, right?
There. Have some generic candy that doesn't taste like anything in particular and isn't even very sweet. No more of these pills when it's time to put on a show. I promise.
I'm sorry. You all deserved so much better of me. I'll be better next time.
...I'm so sorry.
Oh wait, that's it. Cliché. I'm a cliché, a caricature of myself, because god for-fucking-bid someone use a gimmick with any degree of consistency, right? We must constantly be changing, presenting new, different, and exciting performances for everyone to be in awe of. Marveling at our artistry and creativity.
I can't.
I don't have it.
There's nothing HERE!
There should be right now, but there isn't. They changed my pills I think. I can't remember. Iska was getting too loud, always hurting me again, so they gave me something to "take the edge off". It took the edge off my ability to feel anything. To WANT to feel anything. To even care whether I feel anything ever again. Iska told them to. I know she did.
Now nothing makes sense. I'm making stupid mistakes, I can't think, I can't focus.
I can't give a single iota of fuck.
Nathan. Pretty awesome guy, and I'm letting him down. We have things to see, people to do - wait, scratch that, reverse it! So much going on and I can't get out of this gray mire my brain has been sunk into. I was really happy with him, things were going somewhere, and now I can't seem to see my way out of wherever it is I'm stuck.
Andy D. He got most loved. I really wanted it, and I thought the crowd still loved me, but apparently not. I'm not the prettiest in the land anymore, and that actually really meant something to me. So you know... thanks, guys. Thanks for taking that one thing away.
Derek Cosmos. I don't even know what to say. You have a nice smile, and you're really good at remembering to introduce yourself by your full name. We're gonna go and do wrestle-y stuff, but Andy D. might kick your ass for being so suffocating and creepy. No means no, you do realize that, right?
There. Have some generic candy that doesn't taste like anything in particular and isn't even very sweet. No more of these pills when it's time to put on a show. I promise.
I'm sorry. You all deserved so much better of me. I'll be better next time.
...I'm so sorry.
