Post by Gem on Aug 21, 2015 16:24:16 GMT -5
"You shouldn't have been there, Father."
I'd been waiting to say it since the end of Return to Glory, but my nurturing protection of him still held a lot stronger than I thought it would. It truly made me realize how much I'd held back for his sake, not wanting to cause him to drift further. Surprisingly, he seemed more animated than ever.
"Emerald, listen to me!" he demanded. Sighing for a second while trying to calm down, he slowly regrouped before speaking directly to me in his best attempt at a calm voice. "You know as well as I do that they're never going to give you a fair shot. Your first chance, triple threat. Your second, the one who has taken issue with both of you is the referee. I'm supposed to just sit back and watch this?"
"Yes, you are!" I screamed. I took a deep breath, realizing I hadn't yelled like that in a long time. We're taught to contain our emotions as to not reveal our weaknesses, but surely he must know that he is one of mine by now. "Win or lose, I wanted to do this one on my own."
"It wouldn't have been on your own, one way or the other," he challenged my assertion. "The guest ref, the others of the Hand, those above who keep putting them in such convenient positions as to retain the Hand's power... Can't you see what's going on here? This isn't just you, Emerald. It's the entire system. I don't know what it is specifically, but nothing going on is coincidence."
I moved closer to him, staring him deep in his blue eyes. "Going public about who I was will forever taint anything I accomplish. I'm always going to be Lantlas's daughter, and you made that decision with that knowledge in mind. I don't hold it against you, but I don't understand."
"What don't you understand?"
"You're a Hall-of-Famer, former PCW champion, and accolades bestowed upon you of which I could only dream... Why would being related to you work against me now?" I couldn't help but ask this because it didn't make sense to me. Could it have something to do with why he'd been so downtrodden, and why he'd been so reluctant to tell me who I was?
"Em," he started, "before my final run, I burned a lot of bridges. Sure, most of my career here, I was well-respected and liked, but... It's hard to explain. Let's just say someone got into me, and in my name, tore through this place and most of my allies before I could recover it. By the time I did, I was so worn down from the years of bodily abuse that I couldn't overcome it anymore. With everything that had happened, especially after Devon's brother tried to kill me, until..."
I put a hand on his shoulder, not for compassion, but intrigue. "Until what, Father?"
"Until you killed Tomas," he bluntly replied.
That's who it was. The brother of Devon, who had nearly killed my father, and I had been sent in on the mission to save him. What was it with me and that bloodline?
"Now, I see that your chance was wasted yet again, and would've been if I had been there or not. You're paying for my sins, unfortunately, and that's not going to change. Without Tomas, maybe you would've been viewed differently, but this time around, you're constantly going to hear that you didn't earn your shot, that you're overrated, that you'll always live in my shadow. Hell, they'll even say that it was a different PCW when I was there, so that what I've accomplished didn't mean anything either," he bemoaned.
"Do you feel that way, Father?" I asked.
"I've had four years to recharge my batteries. I don't recognize most of these people, but the ones I do know? I've done battle with them, and the respect is mutual. Grimm and I especially had brutal wars that made his Buried Alive match look like a tango by comparison. When I left, I was burnt out. Now I've got more fire in me than I ever have. I only wish I could find Devon and see which strategy she would use..." Father's voice trailed off. He clearly had no idea what had taken place.
"Yeah, if only..." Mine sunk deeper into my own skin, just waiting to penetrate at the worst possible time. Fortunately, I buried it enough that it wouldn't surface at the moment, but sooner or later, I'd have to deal with that too.
"The point is," Father continued, "I may not help you win the championship, but I'm not going to let these envious humans ruin your legacy. I will not let them write your history. As for Sadistic, he'll get his chance to back up those words he was spouting at the Icey's. He'll get his chance right as my flail blasts the side of his jaw."
"You can't do that, Father! I have to do this on my own!" I whined.
"Look around, Emerald," Father instructed. "Look around. None of this is happening on its own. You think the lines haven't been drawn? Sure, this week at Trauma, you've got Sadistic in a tag match with another one of his Hand members. You're teaming with the man..."
"The man who what?" I asked.
"The man who retired me, Emerald," he regretfully admitted. "He's the man who put me out, and he's an amazing competitor and deserves everything he has. I couldn't think of a better ally for you to have in this fight, except nothing is as it seems. You and NCM are walking into another ambush, whether it be corporate or Black Hand-related. Then again, that's basically the same thing at this point. Regardless, you two have the Hand, the corporate ones, not to mention your friend Eira all targeting you. Things are going to get ugly, and I'm not just going to stand by and watch anymore."
"If you must, I won't stop you," I replied, "but do not get involved in my matches, no matter what happens. If this NCM is so great and has your trust, then he has mine. But if he is that great, that means we can take on the Hand, and figure out what the hell is going on. It isn't over between me and Sadistic, and everyone knows that. I can't help it if they think I don't deserve to be here, but I'm not doing it for them. I used to say that I had to prove that I belonged here, but that was leaving far too much focus on the opinions of others. It's not about that anymore. It's about ending a war that he started, and has been allowed to run from far too long. No matter what happens or who gets involved, this will come to an end on his part, and I will do anything to make that happen."
Father put his arms around me, then pulled away to look in my eyes. "I'm very proud of you, Emerald. Even though you think you're stuck in my shadow, you are your own woman, and you belong where you are. I dealt with the same thing and handled it much worse than you. I took it way too personally, and became vulnerable when people figured that out."
He released his grip and turned toward the door. He stopped and looked back once more. "I'm sorry if I had anything to do with the result of Return to Glory, but I can't change the past. I can only do what I need to do for my daughter moving forward."
"Father, right now, that involves letting me and NCM handle our own against Showtime and Sadistic. I will not stop fighting until he either kills me, or I end this war. I will end it the right way."
He opened the door, and took a few steps out. He gazed back one more time with a hint of solemn in his eye.
"If you see Devon, tell her I miss her."
He walked away before I could respond, and it hit me like a shattering dagger. I held myself together, knowing that he didn't know what had happened, but couldn't help resenting the fact that he still loved the woman who destroyed me inside.
I'd been waiting to say it since the end of Return to Glory, but my nurturing protection of him still held a lot stronger than I thought it would. It truly made me realize how much I'd held back for his sake, not wanting to cause him to drift further. Surprisingly, he seemed more animated than ever.
"Emerald, listen to me!" he demanded. Sighing for a second while trying to calm down, he slowly regrouped before speaking directly to me in his best attempt at a calm voice. "You know as well as I do that they're never going to give you a fair shot. Your first chance, triple threat. Your second, the one who has taken issue with both of you is the referee. I'm supposed to just sit back and watch this?"
"Yes, you are!" I screamed. I took a deep breath, realizing I hadn't yelled like that in a long time. We're taught to contain our emotions as to not reveal our weaknesses, but surely he must know that he is one of mine by now. "Win or lose, I wanted to do this one on my own."
"It wouldn't have been on your own, one way or the other," he challenged my assertion. "The guest ref, the others of the Hand, those above who keep putting them in such convenient positions as to retain the Hand's power... Can't you see what's going on here? This isn't just you, Emerald. It's the entire system. I don't know what it is specifically, but nothing going on is coincidence."
I moved closer to him, staring him deep in his blue eyes. "Going public about who I was will forever taint anything I accomplish. I'm always going to be Lantlas's daughter, and you made that decision with that knowledge in mind. I don't hold it against you, but I don't understand."
"What don't you understand?"
"You're a Hall-of-Famer, former PCW champion, and accolades bestowed upon you of which I could only dream... Why would being related to you work against me now?" I couldn't help but ask this because it didn't make sense to me. Could it have something to do with why he'd been so downtrodden, and why he'd been so reluctant to tell me who I was?
"Em," he started, "before my final run, I burned a lot of bridges. Sure, most of my career here, I was well-respected and liked, but... It's hard to explain. Let's just say someone got into me, and in my name, tore through this place and most of my allies before I could recover it. By the time I did, I was so worn down from the years of bodily abuse that I couldn't overcome it anymore. With everything that had happened, especially after Devon's brother tried to kill me, until..."
I put a hand on his shoulder, not for compassion, but intrigue. "Until what, Father?"
"Until you killed Tomas," he bluntly replied.
That's who it was. The brother of Devon, who had nearly killed my father, and I had been sent in on the mission to save him. What was it with me and that bloodline?
"Now, I see that your chance was wasted yet again, and would've been if I had been there or not. You're paying for my sins, unfortunately, and that's not going to change. Without Tomas, maybe you would've been viewed differently, but this time around, you're constantly going to hear that you didn't earn your shot, that you're overrated, that you'll always live in my shadow. Hell, they'll even say that it was a different PCW when I was there, so that what I've accomplished didn't mean anything either," he bemoaned.
"Do you feel that way, Father?" I asked.
"I've had four years to recharge my batteries. I don't recognize most of these people, but the ones I do know? I've done battle with them, and the respect is mutual. Grimm and I especially had brutal wars that made his Buried Alive match look like a tango by comparison. When I left, I was burnt out. Now I've got more fire in me than I ever have. I only wish I could find Devon and see which strategy she would use..." Father's voice trailed off. He clearly had no idea what had taken place.
"Yeah, if only..." Mine sunk deeper into my own skin, just waiting to penetrate at the worst possible time. Fortunately, I buried it enough that it wouldn't surface at the moment, but sooner or later, I'd have to deal with that too.
"The point is," Father continued, "I may not help you win the championship, but I'm not going to let these envious humans ruin your legacy. I will not let them write your history. As for Sadistic, he'll get his chance to back up those words he was spouting at the Icey's. He'll get his chance right as my flail blasts the side of his jaw."
"You can't do that, Father! I have to do this on my own!" I whined.
"Look around, Emerald," Father instructed. "Look around. None of this is happening on its own. You think the lines haven't been drawn? Sure, this week at Trauma, you've got Sadistic in a tag match with another one of his Hand members. You're teaming with the man..."
"The man who what?" I asked.
"The man who retired me, Emerald," he regretfully admitted. "He's the man who put me out, and he's an amazing competitor and deserves everything he has. I couldn't think of a better ally for you to have in this fight, except nothing is as it seems. You and NCM are walking into another ambush, whether it be corporate or Black Hand-related. Then again, that's basically the same thing at this point. Regardless, you two have the Hand, the corporate ones, not to mention your friend Eira all targeting you. Things are going to get ugly, and I'm not just going to stand by and watch anymore."
"If you must, I won't stop you," I replied, "but do not get involved in my matches, no matter what happens. If this NCM is so great and has your trust, then he has mine. But if he is that great, that means we can take on the Hand, and figure out what the hell is going on. It isn't over between me and Sadistic, and everyone knows that. I can't help it if they think I don't deserve to be here, but I'm not doing it for them. I used to say that I had to prove that I belonged here, but that was leaving far too much focus on the opinions of others. It's not about that anymore. It's about ending a war that he started, and has been allowed to run from far too long. No matter what happens or who gets involved, this will come to an end on his part, and I will do anything to make that happen."
Father put his arms around me, then pulled away to look in my eyes. "I'm very proud of you, Emerald. Even though you think you're stuck in my shadow, you are your own woman, and you belong where you are. I dealt with the same thing and handled it much worse than you. I took it way too personally, and became vulnerable when people figured that out."
He released his grip and turned toward the door. He stopped and looked back once more. "I'm sorry if I had anything to do with the result of Return to Glory, but I can't change the past. I can only do what I need to do for my daughter moving forward."
"Father, right now, that involves letting me and NCM handle our own against Showtime and Sadistic. I will not stop fighting until he either kills me, or I end this war. I will end it the right way."
He opened the door, and took a few steps out. He gazed back one more time with a hint of solemn in his eye.
"If you see Devon, tell her I miss her."
He walked away before I could respond, and it hit me like a shattering dagger. I held myself together, knowing that he didn't know what had happened, but couldn't help resenting the fact that he still loved the woman who destroyed me inside.